


Blue Ecstasy

by Vamphile



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-02-10
Updated: 2007-03-17
Packaged: 2018-12-26 19:51:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 62,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12065835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vamphile/pseuds/Vamphile
Summary: Brian's a detective.  Justin is a rookie cop.  They're partners. It's not as dumb as it sounds.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

  
Author's notes: comment here or at my LiveJournal where i'm also Vamphile  


* * *

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter One   


* * *

 

  
  


 

Brian was bored. He stifled a yawn behind a Styrofoam cup of coffee. His memory of the previous night’s trick was almost enough for him to zone out what the commander was saying but only almost.   
  


“So we’re focusing a lot of our resources on shutting down the man’s operation.”   
  


Everyone was standing up, Brian did the same, filing out mumbling shit about finding needles in haystacks and no one caring about a bunch of fags dying from some bad E. He ignored them and went back to his desk.  
  


Ten minutes later Horvath was calling him into his office.  
  


“You bellowed?”  
  


“You’re heading up the case.”  
  


“Which case? I’ve got a lot of shit to do.”  
  


“They want the drug trafficking stopped.”  
  


“I wish them good luck.”  
  


“You and Taylor here are going to be working together.”  
  


Brian turned his attention to the other man in the room. Fuck.   
  


“No.”  
  


“Wasn’t a question, Kinney.”  
  


Brian shook his head and Justin smiled at him. “I’m older than I look.”  
  


“You’d have to be. You look twelve.”  
  


“Didn’t bother you las…”  
  


“I’m not working with you.”  
  


Horvath shook his head. “You two figure out how this buddy movie is gonna work on your own time. Just figure out where this shit is coming from and stop it. Three more people died last week.”  
  


“Didn’t seem such a priority when the men dying were doing it quietly on Liberty Avenue."  
  


“Yeah, well now it’s hit the suburbs and the chief is pissed.”  
  


Brian walked out of Horvath’s office. Justin followed him. “So where do we start.”  
  


“You start by getting some juice and cookies and taking a nap. Let the grown ups deal with this.”  
  


“Fuck off. My age didn’t seem to bother you last night.”  
  


Brian turned quickly. “Shut the fuck up. Last night you were a trick. And you could have told me you were a cop.”  
  


“You could have told _me_.”  
  


Brian turned away again but Justin reached for his elbow. Brian twisted out of his grip. “Don’t fucking touch me. I’m not working with you. I’ll handle this and you can go home to mommy. I’ll put your name on the paperwork when we’re done.”  
  


“Bullshit. It’s my case too, and I have a theory.”  
  


Brian pinched the bridge of his nose and leaned against his desk. Justin stood at the opening to his cubicle, his arms crossed against his chest. “I’m not backing off.”  


“So what’s you’re theory?”  


“I think they’re coming from inside one of the clubs.”  


“Is that what you were doing there last night?”

 Justin laughed. “No. Last night was for fun. Seriously though, I think they’re coming from Pistol or Popperz… maybe Babylon.”   


Brian had had the same thought. “Drugs found in gay club. Brilliant theory.”  
  


“No, not that they’re being dealt within the club. I think one of the primary suppliers is…”  
  


Brian shook his head. “Not Pistol. I know the manger, and the guy who owns it. There’s no way he’s trafficking.”  
  


Justin shrugged. “I don’t know him. The deaths were mostly concentrated around the central club location on Liberty; they’ve got to originate from there. Or well, they probably originate from a bathtub in Tijuana but you know what I mean.”  
  


Brian nodded. “So you’ve got a theory.”  
  


“And we’ll prove it.”  
  


“And you propose to do this by…?”  
  


“You’re too high profile. I’m going under cover.”  
  


“I’m high profile?”  
  


“Please, before I danced with you last night I must have heard four different guys talking about you. Everyone at Babylon knows who you are, and that you’re a cop.”  
  


Brian nodded. He knew the kid was right.  
  


“Fine, we’ll find someone, you’re too young.”  
  


“Fuck off. I’m old enough.”  
  


Brian shook his head and continued to ignore his new partner for the rest of the day. By six he was more than ready to go home, shower and meet Michael at Woody’s.  
  


Justin slid between the main door to his building just before they closed. Brian glared at him. “Fuck off.”  
  


“We have to talk about the case.”  
  


“I disagree.”  
  


“Fine. I’m going to Babylon tonight. I’ll let you know what I find out.”  
  


Brian lifted the grate and stepped into the elevator. “Do what you want.”  
  


Justin turned to go but suddenly Brian had a couple of questions. “Wait.”  
  


Justin turned.   
  


“What’s your plan?”  
  


“Plan?”  
  


Brian leaned closer to him. “Plan. Idea. Steps of action to ensure you don’t end up dead on the floor. Plan.”  
  


Justin shrugged. “I have my sources.” He smiled and Brian wasn’t sure if he wanted to smack him or kiss him but he was very sure that the kid had no idea what he was getting into. “Come on, we’ll talk.”  
  


Justin smiled and headed towards the steps. “Race ya.”  
  


Brian pulled the grated down and hit the button with what might be described as excessive force, but the kid was like a three year old. He had no idea what he was getting himself into.  
  


Justin had been impressed last night. He hadn’t hidden it well. Most cops don’t live like this. Last night he had other things to think about. Now as he looked at the top of the line appliances, stainless steel countertops and imported Italian fixtures. his only feeling was suspicion. Most cops don’t live like this.  
  


Brian watched Justin’s eyes narrow. He wouldn’t be the first person to jump to conclusions. Brian took a beer out of the refrigerator and offered one to Justin who took it absentmindedly. Brian sat down and waited for Justin to say something. Eventually he sat down on the other end of the sofa and put his feet up next to Brian’s. “Nice place.”  
  


“You said that last night.”  
  


“Surprised you remember. You were pretty drunk. You have a cleaning service?”  
  


“Beats the hell out of putting all my furniture back in place myself.”  
  


“So you juggle like that a lot?”  
  


Brian smirked. “You were gonna tell me about your plan, or lack thereof.”  
  


“Yeah…” Justin was about to speak but his stomach decided to do the talking for him. He almost blushed.   
  


“Thai okay?”  
  


Justin nodded and Brian threw him a menu.   
  


They ordered and Brian sat back down on the sofa, two more beers on the coffee table. “So, your plan.”  
  


“I need to get on the inside. I’ll get him to hire me.”  
  


Brian almost choked on his beer. “Who?”  
  


“Gary Saperstein, he owns Babylon. I’m pretty sure that’s where the stuff is starting out.”  
  


“Pretty sure? And you’re going to get a job as what exactly?”  
  


Justin shrugged. “Probably end up dancing in a cage, but…”  
  


Brian shook his head. “No way. Too dangerous.”  
  


“Too dangerous? I’m a cop.”  
  


“Where are you gonna stash a gun in a g-string?”  
  


Justin shrugged and smirked.   
  


“We’ll figure something else out.”  
  


“We? Last I heard you didn’t want me anywhere near this case. You were gonna solve it all by yourself.”  
  


“And last I heard you were intent on going rogue cop and getting yourself killed.”   


“Pfft. I’m not gonna get killed.”  
  


Brian was about to say something when the buzzer sounded. “Dinner.”  
  


Brian paid the delivery guy and by the time Brian turned back to the sofa Justin wasn’t there. He scanned the loft and found him, in bed, naked.  
  


“Not hungry anymore?”  
  


Justin shook his head and slowly stroked himself. Brian’s eyes followed Justin’s hand. He put the food on the counter and pulled his shirt over his head as he walked towards the bed. He’d been drunk last night and still been able to appreciate the texture of his skin, the soft feel of his hair, the tight warmth as Justin’s body melted into his own. He was sober now and planned on taking some time to appreciate all those things properly.  
  


Justin’s hands were wrapped around his neck as he pulled him in for a kiss. His wet pink tongue sliding between Brian’s lips. Brian’s tongue stroked against Justin’s as he removed his pants. He pushed at the man’s hip and Justin rolled over, his legs spread, his back arched. Brian reached for a condom. His arm slid across the smooth skin of Justin’s back and he couldn’t resist as his hand flattened between his shoulder blades and moved in an appreciative glide across his skin. His mouth followed.   
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


I told myself I wasn’t going to do this again. I swore to myself when I moved to Pittsburgh that I was not going to get involved with another cop. I swore to myself after I met him at the station tonight that I would NOT fuck him again, and here I am, naked, on his bed… I didn’t even wait for him to make the first move but damn! Last night was hot. And he was sitting there, drinking a beer, and then he stood up and… well, now I’m naked, and on my knees and his mouth is working it’s way down my back and he may be the hottest man I’ve ever met. I’ve met guys who are more buff, more sculpted. I’ve been with guys who have a much better line of banter than “fuck off, twat.” But I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone set my skin on fire with his lips before. I KNOW I’ve never been so turned on by the sound of a condom wrapper opening.   
  


His tongue is inside me now. His fingers, long, I couldn’t take my eyes off of them tonight wrapped around the neck of the beer bottle… I swear I got hard, like a teenager. And now… oh god. He’s moving his tongue behind my balls and I’m lost. This is not how it’s supposed to go. It shouldn’t be this good. It is. It’s better than this good. I can’t think anymore. I shiver as a breeze blows through the loft and the sweat on my skin dries. He feels it. His body covers mine. He’s pushing inside me. Thick, smooth, wide, amazing. He strokes and I’m pulling the sheets into balls inside my fists. I’m so full so stretched and he’s on top of me, his tongue sliding along the curve of my ear. He bites and I groan.   
  


We’re moving together now. Our rhythm somehow perfect. More perfect than I would expect with a guy I just met, a guy a barely know, a guy I was in love with last night, but then, last night, I was very very drunk.  
  


He pulls out and pushes back in quickly and it’s that painful stretch that pulls me back into the moment. His chest is pressed against my back. His arm curves with mine and his long fingers are between mine and we fist the sheets together as he rides me hard and I’m lost in the sensation. He may be, I can’t tell. All I know is his breathing is ragged, he speeds up and I feel my orgasm blasting out of me as I feel his overtake him. My mind seems to go blank, empty. I feel the cool air again as he pulls off of me, out of me. I hate this part.  
  


I’m lying prone, diagonally across the bed and I smell the smoke of his cigarette. I must have dozed for a second. I sit up and move until I’m sitting next to him against the headboard. He offers me a cigarette and I shake my head. I don’t smoke. He shrugs. His is almost finished and he stubs it out and stands up.   
  


I get up a little more slowly; my knees are still a little rubbery. I pull on my pants and he’s wearing jeans, the top button unbuttoned and nothing else. He hands me a beer as I walk down the few steps from his bedroom. The fucking thing is practically an altar, but then, I think I may have met a real life sex god.   


He moves the boxes of food back to the coffee table and holds up a fork and some chopsticks. I motion towards the chopsticks and we both sit down, digging into our respective orders and not saying anything. Fuck. I wasn’t thinking.  
  


I wanted to fuck him. Christ, I still do. This guy is amazing, but I didn’t do it to get him to work with me. I’m going to solve this thing if he works with me or not. I didn’t do it to get him to profess his undying love; I just… wanted to feel him inside me again. I’m hoping he knows that and I don’t have to actually tell him.  
  


“So where’d you come from?”  
  


 

“Huh?”  
  


“I’d have seen you before. Where’d you come from?”  
  


 

“Oh, I was a cop in Pitcairn. Transferred here.”  
  


“Got tired of busting speeders and high school keggers.”  
  


“Something like that.”  
  


“And now you’re ready to make your first big drug bust in the city.”  
  


“Now I’m ready to do my job. Those drugs are killing people.”  
  


“All drugs kill people.”  
  


 

“Eventually, slowly, maybe. These are causing kids to keel over at seventeen.”  
  


“Someone you know?”  
  


“Huh?”  
  


 

“Sounds like you have a personal investment.”  
  


“In people not dying? Doesn’t everyone.”  
  


Brian shook his head. “No, most people don’t.”  
  


Justin shrugged chewed thoughtfully on another mouth full of sesame coconut shrimp. “I’m not most people.”  
  


Brian shrugged. “So, are you done thinking getting a job at Babylon is a good plan?”  
  


 

“You think you fucked the idea out of me?”  
  


“I was hoping you’d managed to find some common sense.”  
  


“I have. Best way to do this is from the inside. I’m gonna work the inside before everyone on Liberty knows I’m a cop.”  
  


They ate in silence and Brian tried to find a way to politely get his new partner/ex trick out of his loft. He paused for a moment wondering why he cared if it was polite and then decided it must be because they’d have to work together. Otherwise it made no sense at all. In the end he was spared having to figure it out. Once Justin was done eating he pulled his shirt on and found his shoes.   
  


“Later.”  
  


“Later.”  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


Brian’s cell rang. He’d been sitting at his desk, contemplating the information he had on the killer E that had been making the rounds.  
  


“Michael.”  
  


“Where were you last night?”  
  


“Something came up.”  
  


“I’m sure.”  
  


“I’ll be at Babylon tonight.”  
  


“You’d better be. I haven’t seen you all week.”  
  


“It’s Wednesday.” Brian hung up the phone and was contemplating going outside for a cigarette when Horvath called him.  
  


“Yeah?”  
  


“Dinner Sunday.”  
  


“I might be busy.”  
  


“Wasn’t a question. You’ve missed the last two Sundays Deb's gonna have both our balls.”  
  


“Your problem. You married her.”  
  


“Which makes me your almost father in law and your boss. Consider it a direct command.”  
  


“From whom, my father in law, or boss?”  
  


“Both.”  
  


Brian nodded. “Sunday.”  
  


“And bring the kid with you.”  
  


“The kid?”  
  


“Your partner. Taylor.”  
  


“No fucking way.”  
  


 

“He’s new in town. Debbie wants to meet him.”  
  


“If I see him.”  
  


“He’s your partner, why wouldn’t you see him?”  
  


“He’s going deep undercover.”  
  


“As what?”  
  


“One of Sap’s employees.”  
  


“Shit, the kid’ll get himself killed.”  
  


Brian didn’t say anything. It was the same issue he’d been struggling with since Justin had declared his intentions. “He’s a big boy. Let him make his own mistakes.”  
  


“He’s your partner. You’d better be there to…”   
  


Brian walked out of Horvath’s office before he got a lecture on protecting his partner. He didn’t need to hear that shit right now.  
  


He was antsy all day. He went home to take a shower and found Justin standing by the door to his loft.   
  


“What are you doing here?”  
  


“I needed to talk about the case and I can’t be seen near the station, or hanging around your building.”  
  


“You got the job?”  
  


“I start tonight at nine.”  
  


“So what do you need?”  
  


“I need someone I can get the information to. Nothing I learn does any good if it can’t be corroborated and documented.”  
  


“Big words.”  
  


“Fuck off.”  
  


Brian nodded and opened the door to the loft. Justin followed him in.  
  


“I’ll see you tonight. I’ll be at Babylon.”  
  


“I don’t need you there.”  
  


“I’m not going for you. I’m meeting a friend.”  
  


“A date.”  
  


“I don’t do dates.”  
  


“Then who?”  
  


“A friend. Christ, are you always this nosy?”  
  


 

“I’m a detective.”  
  


“No you’re not.”  
  


“I will be one day.”  
  


Not if you don’t learn better interrogation methods.”  
  


Justin shrugged. “I’ll leave the information in your mailbox, but I need a key.”  
  


“Meet me back here tomorrow with anything you learn.” Brian hesitated. “Meet me here at three.”  
  


“I might have to…”  
  


“Just meet me back here when you’re done there.”  
  


Justin nodded.  
  


“Oh.”  
  


Justin turned around. “Yeah?”  
  


“Debbie wants you to come to dinner on Sunday.”  
  


“Who’s Debbie?”  
  


“Horvath’s wife.”  
  


“Dinner with the boss?”  
  


“No, dinner with the boss’s boss, and a myriad of freaks, but I’m required to bring you so you’d better show up.”  
  


“I’ll meet you there.”  
  


“Meet me here. I’ll drive.”  
  


Justin smiled.  
  


“It’s not a date.”  
  


“Clearly, you don’t do dates.”  
  


Brian sighed. “You’re not going to find out anything dancing in a cage.”  
  


“And what are you gonna find out getting drunk off your ass, high on poppers and fucking some guy in the backroom?”  
  


Brian said nothing as he poured himself a scotch. “Don’t you have something to get waxed before your big debut?”  
  


Justin grinned again. “You weren’t complaining last night.”  
  


“Yes, you’re very hygienic.” Brian pressed his hand against Justin’s chest; his plan was to push him out the door. Justin leaned in and kisses Brian. His plan was shot to hell.  
  


He was leaning forward and about to kiss Justin when he hesitated. He saw the question in the blond’s eyes and then leaned down to devour his mouth. Justin was unbuttoning Brian’s shirt and licking down his chest. He kneeled in front of him, unbuckling his belt and unzipping his fly. Brian bit back a smile.   
  


The glass of scotch was in his hand but it was now of the utmost importance that it be somewhere else. His hands needed to be in Justin’s hair. He put the glass precariously on the bar stool and slid his fingers through the soft locks. Justin’s hands found his hips and pulled him closer, deeper as he deep throated him. Brian’s head fell back and he restrained himself from pistoning his hips and fucking the kid’s face. He felt Justin’s tongue, flat and rough, hot and wet, slide along the base of his shaft and rolled his bottom lip into his mouth, biting back the sounds he was close to allowing himself. His back bowed and he came hard. Justin stood up, kissing Brian.   
  


Brian pushed Justin back against the loft door, sucking on his neck. He moved the stupid orange t-shirt, chosen, he was sure, to make Justin look more like a twink, and less like an officer of the law. He sucked on one of his nipples and was surprised to find a nipple ring there. He knew it had not been there yesterday. He looked up questioningly.   
  


Justin shrugged. “Cops aren’t allowed to have them, this will at least throw some people off.”  
  


Brian nodded and flicked at it with his tongue. “Hurt?”  
  


Justin shook his head and pressed his nipple into Brian’s mouth. “I’ve had worse.”  
  


Brian ignored whatever the hell that feeling was. So the kid had felt worse, hadn’t everyone?  
  


He flicked it again and felt the change in Justin’s breathing. He moved his tongue slowly down Justin’s chest and pale flat belly, plunging his tongue into his belly button and enjoying the surprised gasp the action elicited.   
  


He unbuttoned Justin’s jeans with expert ease and was licking the head of his hard cock before Justin’s hands could find purchase in his hair. Eventually Justin gave up any pretense of controlling Brian’s movements. His hands pressed flat against the metal door and his body rocked into Brian’s mouth. When he came Brian’s hands were squeezing his ass. His tongue was swirling the head and his lips had formed a tight wet pressure around his shaft.   
  


Brian stood up and leaned his weight against Justin’s, trapping him between his body and the door. He had a feeling that might be the only thing keeping the kid from falling to the floor. He hoped his smile didn’t look too gratified. He knew it probably did.  
  


After a few moments, when Justin’s breathing was back to a relatively normal level he pulled away. “Be careful tonight.”  
  


Justin nodded.  
  


“The Sap will let you dance on the bar if you let him blow you.”  
  


Justin shook his head. “I don’t need to dance on the bar, I just need access to…”  
  


Brian nodded. “Smart move but watch it, I’ve known this guy for years. He’s a sleaze.”  
  


Justin finished buttoning his jeans. “I think he’s dealing E that’s been stepped on with something seriously toxic to his customers, who he fucks is NOT what makes him a sleaze.”  
  


Brian laughed and Justin turned to go. “I’ll be by tomorrow after your shift.”  
  


Brian shook his head. “Tonight, after yours, or I’m coming to find you and blowing your cover.”  
  


Justin’s smiled and nodded.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

  


  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Two  


* * *

  
  
  
Brian was at Babylon by 8:45, which was unheard of for him. He knew Michael probably wouldn’t be there 'til ten but he wanted a drink. Why not Woody's? He decided he didn’t have to answer that question, even in his own head.  
The music was already thumping. Most of the men on the dance floor were trolls. He ordered a double chivas and was about to down it when he realized that he’d be no use or help if he was drunk. He drank it more slowly and scanned the place looking for Justin.  
  
Justin eventually made his appearance. White spandex briefs and angel wings. Brian tried to catch his eye but once Justin spotted him he seemed to deliberately avoid eye contact again. Sometime before ten Michael and Emmett joined him at the bar. He raised his glass to them, finished what was left at the bottom and moved forward finding someone to dance with.  
  
When he came back almost half an hour later Michael bought them both beers. “Glad we found time to hang out.”  
  
Brian draped an arm over Michael’s shoulder and kissed him on the temple. “I always have time for you Michael.” As he finished the sentence a likely prospect caught his eye. “Gotta go. Be back later.” He heard Michael and Emmett laugh as he danced with the tall man with green eyes. He kept Justin in his peripheral vision. They man was trying to steer them to the back room. Brian smiled and moved back to the bar.  
  
Michael gave him a surprised look. “He have crabs?”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“That guy was hot.”  
  
Brian shrugged and bought Michael another drink to distract him.  
  
“So Ma says you have a new partner.”  
  
Brian nodded, “you’ll meet him Sunday.”  
  
Michael was about to ask another question so Brian dragged him out to dance. He kept Michael occupied 'til he left around midnight. Brian threw back another drink and watched Justin surreptitiously while appearing as if he were scanning the room for fresh meat. He found some, even though he hadn’t been looking very hard. Being Brian fucking Kinney had its advantages.  
  
He led the guy to the backroom and leaned against the wall. Watching Justin dance all night had left him with a strong need to feel talented lips on his cock.  
  
Sadly, the guy was less than talented but Brian held his curly black hair in his fists and closed his eyes, picturing blond hair, and dark pink lips. He came, zipped up and headed back out to the floor. Eventually he realized there was nothing he could do to help and even less he’d be able to do if he couldn’t get his ass out of bed an to work the next day. He left hoping Justin saw him go; knowing Justin would meet him back at the loft by three.  
  
At three Brian was on the sofa, one hand behind his head, smoking and waiting. By three thirty he was pacing.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
Justin did his job. He danced; he made minimal eye contact with any of the men and even less with Brian. The last thing he needed was his cover blown on the first night. When he finished his shift he swallowed a bottle of water and changed into his “street clothes”. Not his usual taste. A little too bright, a little too tight, but he was undercover. A couple of the other dancers invited him to join them for a drink. He did. Several beers and tequila shooters later they all stumbled out of the club. Justin hadn’t found out much, but he’d made nice, he’d made friends, and information was easier to get that way.  
  
He gulped the cool air when he left Babylon. His eyes felt red and dry. He was tired. He headed towards Tremont. He had to let Brian know all was well and then get home and sleep. He was expected at the club early tomorrow to get his new costume and learn some lame routine.  
  
He took the elevator up and was about to knock on the door when it flew open. “Where the fuck were you?”  
  
Justin squinted… “Mom?”  
  
“Fuck off. You were supposed to be here by three.”  
  
Justin laughed. “I didn’t know I had a curfew. I had some drinks with the guys.”  
  
“Why?”  
  
Justin shrugged. “Easier to get information out of people when they think you’re one of them.”  
  
“So what’d you find out?”  
  
“Nothing. I’m tired. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Justin turned to leave but Brian grabbed his arm.  
  
“Nothing? What the fuck were you doing there all night?”  
  
“Dancing, duh. You saw me. You were there, you know, except when you were too busy in the back room.”  
  
“Jealous?”  
  
Justin shot him a dismissive look. “Brian, I know we’ve got this whole buddy movie banter thing we do, but I’m seriously exhausted. So if we’re going to fuck, cool, I’ll go to your bed. If not, I’m going home to sleep in my own.”  
  
Brian pulled him forward and kissed him. “My bed. Now.”  
  
Justin nodded. “I’m drunk, and, as I think I’ve mentioned, exhausted, so I’ll let it go, but I’m not much for being ordered around like a puppy.”  
  
Brian smiled as Justin pulled his shirt over his head and dropped his pants, leaving a trail of clothes as he gave his speech and headed up the steps to the bed.  
  
He dropped his own jeans and watched Justin make himself comfortable. “Which side is yours?”  
  
Brian stared at him, not sure he understood the question. Justin looked up. “I’m too tired to go home if you’re going to fuck me. I’m going to fall asleep. No need in both of us getting up on the wrong side of the bed in the morning, on which side of the bed do you usually sleep?”  
  
Brian gestured towards the side closest to the bathroom. Justin nodded. “Okay, you can fuck me now, and I promise I won’t fall asleep on your side.”  
  
Brian watched as Justin laid back and closed his eyes. He shook his head. “I’ll fuck you in the morning, just sleep.”  
  
Justin sat up. “I’ll go home.”  
 _The fuck?_ Brian thought to himself. “The fuck?” too late he realized he’d said it out loud.  
  
“That was the deal. We fuck, I sleep here. We don’t fuck, I have a perfectly good bed at my place, well, not perfectly good, it’s got enough space for me, but I haven’t bought any shelves yet so the other side is completely covered in stuff, but that’s really not the issue here.”  
  
“Justin.”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“Sleep.”  
  
“I didn’t come here to sleep.”  
  
“Are you sure all you’ve had is alcohol?”  
  
Justin nodded “a lot of it. I think I downed four shots in half an hour.”  
  
Brian shook his head. “Sleep. You gonna be sick?”  
  
“I don’t throw up when I drink too much.”  
  
“Good.”  
  
“Only if I take Tylenol.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Nothing, I’m allergic.”  
  
“To Tylenol.”  
  
“Yeah, and codeine.”  
  
“That’s… “  
  
“I know, freakish. Can we talk about it tomorrow? Either I’m sleeping here, now, or I’ve got to get a cup of coffee into me and then catch a bus.”  
  
“Justin.”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“Go to sleep.”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
Brian watched as Justin did just that. he let his own head fall back on the pillow, he was tired, emotionally exhausted, seriously horny, and not a little amused by the man who really did look a lot like a little blond club boy, especially with his lashes fanned out against his cheeks and the glitter from the club catching the blue lights over the bed.  
  
Brian closed his eyes and tried not to think about what the maids were going to say about trying to get glitter out of the sheets.  
  
Justin woke up in to the alarm. Brian grumbled and moved his hand forcefully slamming it down on the dresser twice before he actually hit the button to turn it off. He seemed to be making no move to get up. Justin closed his eyes again. He felt Brian move and assumed he was getting out of bed. He was wrong. Brian’s body moved closer to his. Brian’s arm draped over his waist. Justin figured he was sleeping. Wrong again. Brian’s hand moved slowly, starting at his chest. He flicked at the nipple ring and Justin gasped and cursed the fact that he’d have to take it out once the case was closed. Brian’s hand seemed to be moving of its own volition, nothing else about the man indicated that he was awake.  
  
His fingers fanned out over Justin’s stomach and then moved lower, combing through is pubic hair and finally grasping his cock. Justin groaned. He was tired, but there was no way he was going back to sleep now. He moved his hips a little, enjoying the friction of Brian’s hand on his dick, gratified to feel Brian’s erection against his ass. They stayed like that for a while, Brian stroking Justin, not hard enough to get him off, just enough to make him squirm.  
  
Justin pressed his ass against Brian’s groin, the international signal for “now would be a good time to fuck me.” but Brian seemed too drowsy, or too intent on torturing Justin slowly to get the message. Justin decided maybe body language wasn’t enough. He tried words. “Now would be a good time to fuck me.”  
  
He felt Brian move closer, felt his breath against his ear. “Not what you said last night.”  
  
“Actually that was this morning. A few scant hours ago and I really need to go back to sleep so, you know, fuck me. Then you can go in and be on time, Horvath will probably be shocked, and I can get some more sleep.”  
  
Brian laughed, and Justin wriggled out of his grip, mourning the loss of Brian's warm hand around his cock. He was facing Brian now, Brian’s arm still across his body. Their cocks almost touching. Brian’s hand found its way to Justin’s ass. Brian’s hand splayed across Justin's ass and pulled him forward, pressing their bodies together. “You’re pretty demanding. You know that?”  
  
Justin nodded against Brian’s neck. “I’ve been told. I’m also pretty tight. Sure you don’t want to fuck me?”  
  
Brian kissed Justin. Justin ignored the stale cigarette taste and just enjoyed the moist heat of Brian’s mouth and the feel of Brian’s fingers running along the crack of his ass.  
  
Eventually he pulled back. “Brian, I’ve got to work today. I really do need to get back to sleep.”  
  
Brian nodded and pushed at Justin's hip. He rolled over.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
Brian’s POV  
  
He’s pretty fucking confident. Then again, we did agree last night that I’d fuck him in the morning. His arms are folded over the pillow and his face is resting on them, his legs are spread and I swear to Christ, he has to have practiced that casual pose because there’s no way anyone can make me want them this much without putting thought into it. No fucking way.  
  
He grinds against the sheets and his pale skin against the dark blue is… I’m going to fuck him, but first, I really want to taste him again. I want him to want this. He’s acting like he’d be just as happy if I showered and let him jerk himself off. Fuck that.  
  
His skin is amazing. He smells like beer, and tequila, and Babylon, but under that, he tastes like… there aren’t words. It’s musky, and sharp, and acidic and sweet, all at the same time… must be that glitter they make him wear. Whatever. I part his cheeks and he moves. He raises himself up on his knees, just a little. He loves a good rim job, he told me that the first night, when he was too drunk to… or maybe he wasn’t, maybe he was just telling me what he wanted. I’m not going to overanalyze this. He was playing me, or he wasn’t. Either way, kid’s a hellion in the sack when he wants to be. Not now though. Apparently now what he wants is my tongue up his ass. I can oblige. I lick at his hole and he sighs. Just lets out this long breath like he’d been holding it, waiting. I plunge my tongue into him and he lets out a small sound in the back of his throat and pushes himself back against my face. His hand is moving towards his own cock but he’s not coming until I’m inside him. I move his wrist away. He moves it back when I bring my hands back to his ass. Fucker.  
  
I lean over him and get a condom and lube. He takes the lube from me, and almost before I can get the condom on he’s got a finger in his own ass, fucking himself with it. I can’t move my eyes from the sight of that finger disappearing and then reappearing. He adds a second one and I wrap my hand around his wrist again, guiding him. He angles towards his hand. So, good to know, he’ll let me control him, as long as I’m making him do what he was going to do anyway.  
  
I pull his hand away completely and I think he just growled. This little twinkie is growling at me? But he’s not, not really, a twinkie…he really did growl. He’s a man, a cop, and he’s on his knees now, facing me. Um… were his eyes always that narrow?  
  
He pushes me backwards and he’s straddling my hips. Hmmm, he doesn’t seem tired anymore. His hand wraps around my cock, and then he’s lowering himself onto me, slowly. Really really slowly. I bend my knees and plant my feet for leverage pushing up into him but he raises himself up at the same time, preventing me from even taking that much control. The fuck? He’s got one hand on either of my shoulders now and he’s pressing down, further, further. And when he’s almost taken all of me he raises himself up again. I’m going to have bruises on my shoulders…I really don’t care.  
  
He moves 'til just the head of my cock is inside him and I’m about to protest when I think he’s gonna pull off completely but then he slams down onto me, fast. I think I let out an oof, or something. He’s clenching and rippling, hot and tight around me, and he’s moving fast now. Fucking himself on me, angling his hips. He takes a hand off of my shoulder and finds my hand, bringing it to his cock. My dick is up his ass, how did he end up running this show exactly? Who cares? He’s doing an excellent job.  
  
We’re stroking him, his hand still slick with lube, coating his cock, and thus my hand as well. His other hand is on his own thigh and I lay my hand on top of it. I want more contact, I’m not touching him nearly enough. He keeps fucking himself on me until he’s close. I can feel it. I’m about to come. He moves so that the head of my cock hits his prostate and then he just grinds down, making slow circles on me, around me, with me. He’s letting the head hit his prostate with every movement now. His hand guides me to speed up on his cock.  
  
We come at the same time. He shoots across my chest, and I’m coming hard into the condom inside him.  
  
He leans back against my thighs for a second, his arms dangling at his sides, his head back. His eyes are really really blue. I want to sit up and lick his throat. He pulls off of me and rolls back to what has been established as _not_ my side of the bed. I watch him burrow into the pillows and pull the duvet up until I can barely tell he’s still there.  
  
“Thanks. See you later.” He mumbles it against the pillow. I think he’s already half asleep. I guess I’ll shower and go to work.  
  
It’s not until I’m about to get into my car that I realize I’ve just been sent off like a trick, from my own goddamned loft!  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
Brian had trouble keeping his eyes open most of the morning. He’d only gotten a couple of hours of sleep, and unlike Justin, he didn’t have the luxury of falling back asleep after they fucked. The thought of that made Brian’s cock twitch. He focused on something else. The image of dangerously narrowed blue eyes kept popping back into his head.  
  
He finished a couple of reports he’d been working on and considered calling Justin to see if he was up, and more coherent. He must have found out _something_ last night.  
  
He was still debating when Horvath came by his cubicle. “What’d Taylor find out?”  
  
Brian shook his head. “Don’t know yet. He didn’t get off 'til after three.”  
  
“You tell him about Sunday?”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“You and he…”  
  
Brian looked up at Horvath. “You want to know if we’re fucking?”  
  
Carl shook his head. “I was asking if you were getting along.”  
  
“We’re playing nice, I promise.”  
  
“Just get this thing wrapped up quickly. They’re breathing down my neck.”  
  
“Which is why you’re breathing down mine?”  
  
“That and Debbie.”  
  
“What’s she got to do with the case?”  
  
“Some of her boys are dying. You know diner regulars…”  
  
“Hustlers.”  
  
“Yeah, but you know Deb...”  
  
“Heart and mouth, both too fucking big.”  
  
“Exactly. So she wants this wrapped up.”  
  
“Well, I never disobey a direct command from a superior officer, so if Debbie says fix it...”  
  
“She does.”  
  
Brian nodded and stood up. “I’m heading out. I’ve got to catch Taylor before he leaves for work. Oh, and my hours are gonna change if I’ve got to work this case. It’s not a nine to five thing.”  
  
Horvath raised his eyebrows and then scowled at his coffee. “This shit’s cold. I’ll see what I can do about the hours.”  
  
Brian didn’t say anything. He headed back to the loft. His loft. His loft, from which he’d been summarily dismissed this morning. His anger grew with each block.  
  
By the time he’d reached the loft he’d built up enough steam to have an argument that would be an excellent precursor to some really rough, angry sex, in which he could have the opportunity to prove who was _really_ in control here.  
  
He opened the door ready to roust the sleeping blond from _his_ bed. The bed he owned ALL of, not just one side. _both_ sides were his thank you very much. He was about to say something when Justin slid past him. “Hi, you’re home early. I used your shower, hope you don’t mind. Bye, I’m late for work.”  
  
“Stop.”  
  
Justin turned. “Didn’t I tell you about that whole ordering me around like a puppy thing last night? Did I dream that?”  
  
Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. “Come inside.”  
  
Justin headed towards the elevator. “Can’t. Late. Bye.”  
  
He pulled the grate down and hit the button. Brian was about to say something but the elevator lurched to action and Justin disappeared. Brian cursed and closed the door.  
  
He noticed the place was clean. No crumbs on the counter, although there was one less bagel than there had been this morning. No coffee mug in the sink. He moved towards the bedroom and glanced to see the towel neatly hung in the bathroom and the bed made. He shook his head. Fucking twat kid.  
  
He pulled off his clothes and took a nap. He was tired, he had to go to Babylon tonight to keep an eye on Justin and the brat had better check in with him after his shift.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
Justin changed into his new costume and practiced the steps for the new routine; they were having a "Fab Abs" contest. He was suddenly grateful to his mother for making him take those seemingly nonsensical ballroom dancing classes when he was eleven. Although, as he thought about it, he was almost 100 percent positive that memorizing steps while wearing a lime green Speedo and sneakers is not how his mother pictured him using his talents. He reminded himself to call her tomorrow. She’d left three messages over the past week.  
  
When rehearsal was over several of the dancers invited him to join them for dinner. Justin pulled on his jeans and followed them to the nearest pizza place. He walked past a beat cop he recognized and tried his best not to react. The officer was smart enough not to show any recognition and Justin let out a relieved sigh as he joined the other three men in a booth.  
  
After they ordered pizza and a pitcher of beer the attention turned to the new guy. "So, what do you do?"  
  
Justin had prepared his back story. "I’m going to school. Well, I’ll start in the fall. 'til then, just saving money."  
  
"You make enough working in the cage?"  
  
Justin shrugged. "It’s a start. I’ve got some saved up."  
  
"There’s a shortcut to the high traffic dance spots."  
  
"Yeah, not really into that, but thanks."  
  
"He’s not that bad. Gary's a good guy."  
  
Justin highly doubted it, but now was not the time to belabor the point. "I’m okay, thanks."  
  
They were joined by a tall lanky kid a few moments later. "Is Gary pissed?"  
  
"At what?"  
  
"I missed rehearsal. Fuck, was it complicated?"  
  
Morrison, the one who'd first started asking Justin questions, grabbed a breadstick and shook his head. "It’s exactly like the Wet Willy routine. I thought you worked a party last night so you could have off tonight."  
  
"Yeah, but I need the money. Fucking professor requiring another goddamned textbook."  
  
There were five men at the table including Justin; all of them were nodding in commiseration.  
  
"You worked one of Gary’s parties?" Justin tried to steer the topic back to what it was exactly Gary was into, or involved with."  
  
"Yeah, you know, stand around, look pretty..."  
  
Justin had a feeling working for Gary Saperstien required more than that but he didn't push it. "Maybe I can work one; I could use the extra cash."  
  
"I thought you said you were flush."  
  
Justin started to dislike Morrison. "I am, but reserves are always nice. How hard can it be? Stand there, look pretty, I can do that."  
  
He saw a couple of them shift in their seats or fidget with their beer mugs. He knew he was right. One of them might have been about to say something but just then the pizza came and conversation turned a corner. They were laughing and on their third pitcher of beer when Morrison shepherded them all back towards Babylon. Justin got the feeling Morrison was older than he looked, but hey, who wasn't? As Justin trailed behind the boisterous twinks Morrison held him back for a minute. "You’ll do fine tonight."  
  
Justin smiled. Morrison looked like he was about to say something else. Justin waited but nothing was forthcoming so he headed back to the club.  
  
Justin danced; he watched Brian watch him and wanted to tell him to cut it the fuck out. Brian didn't look worried, he looked...angry? Justin wasn't sure but he was sure that Brian’s gaze was going to draw more attention to him. Justin moved closer as Brian slid a ten dollar bill inside his briefs and whispered into his ear. "I’m heading out soon. By four or I swear to Christ I’ll kill you."  
  
"I’ll just go home and meet you tomorrow."  
  
Brian glared. "You want me to blow your cover right now?"  
  
Justin stood up and crossed his thumb over his palm, for just a second, enough to gesture the number four to Brian who watched his hand but made no eye contact. He turned around and Justin watched him pull a tall broad shouldered guy into the backroom. He smiled and caught the eye of an older silver haired man who'd been checking him out all night. He made an extra couple of hundred dollars with a few flashes of this big smile thing he'd learned. He'd been working this particular smile since he was a teeneager. He'd found it was the best way to get teachers to agree to extending assignment deadlines and bosses agreeing to days off.  
  
He and the guys drank a few beers at the bar after they'd changed to street clothes. he saw them passing a bullet throughout the evening but none of them seemed to have died, so it probably wasn't the same batch, or they were more used to it than the people who were dying, or they were getting stuff that hadn't been stepped on a second time and it was the second cutting that was killing people, or, or, or. Justin’s head was spinning with questions but he wasn't drunk when he left a little before four.  
  
At a quarter after four he was at Brian’s door. The door flung open again. Brian seemed to be in a perpetual state of aggravation Justin noticed...and then amended, except when they were fucking.  
  
He decided to fuck Brian first, and talk to him afterwards. Far more sensible than trying to talk to an unreasonably angry man and then trying to get laid.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
Brian was aggravated. Justin had come to check in at the loft late, again, and now seemed to be ignoring him completely. Well, not completely. Justin’s hands were splayed against Brian’s chest and pushing him. He felt the sofa hit the back of his thighs and let himself fall. Justin removed Brian’s pants quickly, dropped his own and fell onto Brian, between his naked thighs.  
  
Brian felt Justin’s tongue probing for entrance into his mouth and he resisted, and then opened his lips, pulling Justin’s tongue into him. Sucking on it. Scratching it lightly with his teeth and then nibbling on that full bottom lip for a moment. He let his head fall back then. "Learn anything?"  
  
"Yeah, dancing in a cage is boring, and makes you horny."  
  
"I meant about..."  
  
"I’m bored and horny; we'll talk about work when we've fixed those two things."  
  
Brian wrapped his arms around Justin and pulled him fully on top of him. In a complicated maneuver that involved bending his knees, sliding one foot to the floor for leverage, ignoring the warm flesh grinding against his body, and maintaining control against simply humping Justin’s thigh 'til they both came, Brian flipped their position until he was hovering over Justin, his weight on his arms. His hips between Justin’s naked thighs. "Horny?"  
  
Justin’s legs wrapped around Brian’s hips and his cock, hard, hot, and leaking, moved against Brian’s. "Yeah. Fuck me, then we'll talk."  
  
Brian reached behind Justin, and pulled the condom from behind the pillow. The lube was under the sofa. Justin’s hand found it before Brian’s did. Brian took it out of his hand and then realized his predicament. This kid...man...cop...twink...whatever was way too aggressive. If he used both hands to do the prep work, Justin would no doubt be running the show again in a matter of moments. If he gave the lube to Justin... well, same song, different verse. Finally he handed the condom to Justin, who smirked.  
  
Brian’s brain got enough blood to realize what he'd done. "Put it on me."  
  
Justin nodded and Brian moved forward toward Justin’s hands.  
  
He slid inside Justin almost effortlessly, and was still astounded by how hot and tight he was. By how good he was... how they fit. Justin’s hands were on the back of his neck, pulling him in for a kiss. Brian's hands were everywhere, and still not touching Justin enough. Brian tried to stop thinking, because this was the second time within this single interaction that Brian had wished for more hands. Stupid. He stopped thinking and just paid attention to the important things. Things like the feel of Justin’s thighs against his hips. Things like the feel of Justin’s teeth nipping at his bottom lip, his mouth sucking Brian’s tongue inside it and then pulling back, causing Brian’s head to follow. He could taste those lips forever. Or well, until he came, which might be any moment now. He pulled back and Justin moved his body with Brian’s. Brian plunged back in and Justin was grunting out commands, demands, directions....Brian didn’t need a GPS to find Justin’s prostate. He tuned out Justin’s words and lost himself in watching Justin shudder under him. He pulled back before Justin could come though. He moved slowly, and held Justin's hands over his head, refusing to let him jerk himself to completion. He was running this show goddammit.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~  
  
Justin's POV  
  
Um... I may have pushed this control freak just a little too far. The look on his face... it's a little scary. His hand is around my wrist. One hand holding them both and I can't really get out of his grip... he's strong. I’m close, but he won't let me touch myself, apparently he's going to do it or it's not going to happen. I want to scream because he seems intent on making this take as long as possible. Now, don't get me wrong, that's not always a bad thing, but it's four thirty in the morning, I’m still getting used to this schedule, I’ve had at least three beers in the last hour and now he wants to take his time? Fuck this. I open my mouth to say something but he leans in and sticks his tongue down my throat. Okay, he tastes really good. It’s weird. I usually HATE guys who smoke, but on him... it's mixed with mint, and bourbon, and coffee, and it's intoxicating. The air is warm and musky around us. Pungent and his eyes are... have I mentioned they're a little scary. I try to talk again but he puts his hand over my mouth. I freak.  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
Brian's POV  
  
He's with me now. Moving with me. He tries to talk and I push my tongue in his mouth. His hands twist in my grip but they're pressed against the arm of the sofa and he won't get loose until I’m ready for him to. His ankles cross behind me and pull me forward. I’m moving slowly now, letting the pressure build again. I’m not sure if I’m gonna let him come this time, or next time, or maybe I’ll just keep taking him to edge and bringing him back all night. He opens his mouth again and I put my hand over it. I expect him to bite my palm, or lick it, either way I’ll remove it in a second... but then he's bucking against me. I look at his eyes and that's not passion... I let go, of all of him. My hands are at my sides, palms up, his legs are not around me anymore, he's using them to push himself against the edge of the sofa. Neither one of us is hard anymore. He’s... fuck, is he crying?  
  
I try to touch his shoulder but he slaps my hand away and glares at me. Nope, not crying. Pissed, but not crying.  
  
"You fucking asshole."  
  
"What the hell was that?"  
  
"That was me not being into rape scenes, you stupid motherfucking control freak."  
  
He’s pulling on his jeans now. Finding his shirt. I don’t want him to leave... not like this.  
  
"Wait."  
  
"Fuck off. You order me around, you feel threatened the moment any one else takes the slightest iniative when fucking, and then you pull something like that. Fuck. Off!"  
  
"Justin."  
  
He’s shaking his head and moving towards the door. "Just tell me what you found out at Babylon."  
  
"Nothing. The Sap hires little twinks as party favors, which is not surprising, most of his boys are college students. Whatever they're taking isn't toxic, and I think the bartenders are in on the distribution thing. Goodbye."  
  
"Justin...I’m..."  
  
"You’re..."  
  
"Sorry." Fuck, did I just say that? Yeah, well, I am, I didn't mean to freak him.  
  
He’s walking towards me now, stalking towards me actually. "You don't say that a lot do you?"  
  
"I’m not usually sorry."  
  
"But you are now? Why?"  
  
How the fuck do I know? "How the fuck do I know?"  
  
"I think you know yourself pretty fucking well."  
  
"Maybe. The bartenders are in on it?"  
  
He nods. "I think so."  
  
"Gonna tell me what the fuck just happened?"  
  
He shakes his head. "I’m going home. Sleeping in my own bed. I’ll see you Sunday."  
  
"You working tomorrow?"  
  
"At Babylon? Yeah, dancing, nothing dangerous."  
  
"I’ll see you after your shift."  
  
"This is getting ridiculous."  
  
"And yet..."  
  
"You’re a fucking control freak and I’m not checking in with you every night. I’ll see you Sunday."  
  
I look at him and he runs a hand through his hair... a shaky hand. "Stay here."  
  
"No."  
  
"We didn't finish."  
  
"We’re finished."  
  
Ouch... why the fuck does that hurt? It shouldn’t. Fuck, let him go. He can go home and sleep in his bed, in his apartment with no shelves and shit all over the bed. "Goodbye."  
  
"Brian, I’ll see you Sunday."  
  
I nod. "Sunday."  
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~  
  
Justin's POV  
  
Oh Christ, that was embarrassing. I just... hate that... fuck, my hands are shaking, and he better not have seen that. It’s after five am, people are starting the morning rush hour and I’m just getting back to my place. I walk most of the way. It's only about thirty blocks, takes me an hour but I’m exhausted by the time I get there and I crash on the small part of the bed that isn’t covered in books. The blinds do little to cut the light and I remind myself to buy some room darkening drapes and some bookshelves this weekend. It’s the last thought I have until I hear my phone.  
  
"'lo?"  
  
"Taylor, you have to check in."  
  
"Brian?"  
  
"No. Horvath, your boss."  
  
"Oh, Detective Horvath. I'm sorry, I was asleep, I’m..."  
  
"Undercover, yeah, I know. I expect you to check in occasionally."  
  
"I check in with Brian... if I’m seen at the station..."  
  
"Fine. Brian. Every day."  
  
"Every day. Tell him he wins. Goodnight."  
  
Horvath looked up at Brian. "He said to tell you that you win."  
  
Brian grimaced but breathed a little easier. Direct orders from a superior officer. He’d check in.  
  


 


	3. Chapter 3

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Three 

* * *

  


  
Justin woke up again at a little after six and cursed. He’d meant to get a few things done before he headed to Babylon but now he wouldn’t have the chance. He sat up and grabbed his phone. If he didn’t call his mother soon she’d probably send the police looking for him. The idea of the entire force seeing an APB for their newest recruit made him laugh. He called her.  
  
“Justin!”  
  
“Hi mom, sorry I haven’t called. Working the night shift.”  
  
“Well, everyone has to start somewhere.”  
  
“I know.”  
  
“Did you get my card?”  
  
“Yes. And you know, I don’t need you to send me cash. I’m fine. I have a job.” _Two jobs_ Justin thought to himself.   
  
“I just wanted to make sure you were covered.”  
  
“And now I’m more than covered.”  
  
“So what’s new?”  
  
Justin gave her a revised and edited version of his life. Leaving out bits like dancing in a cage, and not working actually in the station house, but at a club. Other than that, there was full disclosure.  
  
“JUSTIN!”  
  
“What?”  
  
“You can’t sleep with your partner.”  
  
“Um… too late?”  
  
“Justin.”  
  
“It’s not like that, mom. He’s not looking for anything. I’m not looking for anything.”  
  
“Well, be careful.”  
  
“Always am.”  
  
He heard his mother sigh and chose to ignore it.  
  
He spent about half an hour online and ordered some bookcases. Eventually he had to get all of his stuff off of the floor and his bed. He showered quickly and headed to Babylon.  
  
He was a little early, and wandering around a bit aimlessly when Gary called to him from the catwalk. “Taylor, c’mere.”  
  
He followed Gary into his office. It was a dark and unadorned place with little more than a sofa, desk and filing cabinet. _not the way TV shows portray drug dealer’s_ Justin thought to himself.  
  
“You doing okay?”  
  
Justin nodded. “I think so.”  
  
“You making enough money? You’re not really in the high traffic areas.”  
  
“I like my spot. I get to people watch.”  
  
“You’re not here for your own amusement.”  
  
“I know, I’m here for theirs.”  
  
“If you want to amuse them a little more personally…”  
  
Justin shook his head at Gary’s leer.   
  
“Well, if you change your mind.”  
  
“I might, you never know.”  
  
Justin left and as the lights went down and customers began to enter and head towards the bar Justin changed into his costume and took his place above the crowd. It was easier this way. He had a better view of the club. He watched as bartenders passed customers change back to them, with something hidden underneath the rumpled dollar bills. He watched the other dancers sharing a little chemical energy. He watched Brian try not to stare at him. He knew he was missing something. He could feel it, he just didn’t know where he should be looking.  
  
When he went back to Brian’s that night he felt a small twinge of anxiety. Things had changed last night. He hadn’t told his mother about it. He didn’t want to talk about it. But they wouldn’t be fucking anymore. He missed it already but then again… not last night, not with someone who, he realized, didn’t even really know him. He thought it might be best if he followed his mother’s sound advice and didn’t fuck anyone for a while. That thought bothered him too and he’d decided that maybe just getting his needs met at a bathhouse wouldn’t count.   
  
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  
After Horvath called Justin and ensured his compliance Brian had tried to casually question his boss about his new partner. His boss, the detective, recognized the cloaked interrogation methods and told him, in no uncertain terms, with language that he either picked up from longshoremen, or Debbie, that he was to leave the kid’s history where it belonged… in the past.  
  
Brian agreed. And when Horvath left for the day he sat down in front of the man’s computer and logged into the unit’s personnel records.   


>   
>   
>   
>  Taylor, Justin  
>   
> DOB 03 – 12 – 1982  
>   
> Address: 2207 Humber Way  
> #305  
> Pittsburgh PA 15219  
>   
> Date Of Hire: 04 – 09 – 2006  
>   
> Date Of Termination: TBD  
>   
> 

Brian scrolled down the page.

>   
> PREVIOUS INVESTIGATIONS/COMPLAINTS  
>   
> FEB 05 2005: PEER COMPLAINT OF BEHAVIOR UNBECOMING A POLICE OFFICER  
> RESULT: UNFOUNDED  
>   
> FEB 07 2005: PEER COMPLAINT OF HARRASSMENT  
> RESULT: UNFOUNDED  
>   
> FEB 11 2005: PEER COMPLAINT OF…  
>   
>   
> 

  
Brian read down the sheet. 38 separate complaints over the course of three months, and then an IAD report on a complaint filed by someone else involving Justin. Harassment, assault, battery, endangering an officer. Brian scanned the report.

 _Assault? Battery?_ he scrolled down further and found the pictures of the damage. His anger was building. So apparently, Pitcairn PD weren’t happy to have a fag on their force. He printed the report and closed out the file. Horvath should have told him. Justin should have told him. He checked his watch, almost eight.

Brian went home and changed into black jeans and a sleeveless shirt. He checked his hair, changed his shirt. Checked his hair again, changed his shirt a third time and then headed towards Babylon.

His eyes followed Justin as he walked out of The Sap’s office. He looked pensive. Brian wanted to yank him out of the building and ask him about what he’d read. He didn’t. He just watched. Justin disappeared and then took his place above the crowd to dance. Brian was unable to take his eyes off of him. It was Friday, the place was filling up and offers were being made, and declined. It shouldn’t make a difference, but it did. After what happened last night, and what he’d learned today, he was less and less comfortable with Justin’s employment by Gary, with Justin’s need to control things, (although he now understood it), and with Justin going back to working as a beat cop with the assholes on the Pittsburgh PD. Brian was suddenly beginning to realize that the kid was fucked… or maybe that was him.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Brian left the club at a little after two. He tried to busy himself until Justin showed up. He heard the knock on the door at a little before three. Surprised, this was early for Justin, he opened the door.

“I’m fine. Going home. Tired.”

“Wait, can we…”

“What?”

“Talk?”

Justin looked confused. “About what? I didn’t find anything out tonight. The bartenders are definitely dealing, beyond that. I know exactly nothing.”

“But you talked to Gary?”

“Yeah, I’m trying to get him to offer me a chance to work one of his parties. I think one or two more days and he’ll ask.”

Brian’s brow furrowed. “You’re going to…”

“Stand around, look pretty.”

“Don’t bullshit me.”

“Well, he’ll want more, he’s not getting it.”

Brian had about three hundred things he wanted to ask. He was as surprised as Justin when his next question was; “you get the stuff off your bed?”

Justin shook his head. “Not yet. Busy. I’m going home.”

“You can stay.”

“No, I can’t.”

“Justin.”

“Brian, we don’t mean anything to each other. We’re partners. You’re hot. We fucked. If I stay, then what? I need to go home.”

“You’re working tomorrow.”

“Yeah. I have Sunday off.”

“Good. I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

Justin nodded and Brian wanted to move forward, to touch him. He realized they hadn’t touched since he’d fucked up. He’d covered Justin’s mouth and… one little gesture, easily overlooked but the reaction was clear. He’d fucked up.

Brian heard the door close. Justin was gone.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Fucker. I refuse to feel guilty because I’m not fucking him anymore. He’s hot. I’d happily fuck him again except… he’s my partner, he’s a control freak, he doesn’t fucking know me. That’s the problem. Too much, too soon. And the control freak thing. Whatever. Now we’re just partners. I get home and there’s a package on my doorstep. It’s from my mother… curtains.

She sent me vinyl-backed curtains. Good. I can go back to sleep after I hang them.

But once they’re up, and the room is dark I’m not tired. I move to the living room. The sofa is not my style but then, neither are the curtains. I don’t spend enough time here awake to care. When I do, I’ll change them. In the meantime, I’m perfectly happy with my mother’s cast offs. I curl up in the corner of the sofa and flip through the channels. I must have fallen asleep before I found anything I like.

I remember turning the TV off and going back to sleep. By the time I wake up again it’s almost three in the afternoon and I’m running late…again. I remind myself to buy an alarm clock for the living room if I’m going to end up falling asleep on the sofa.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

This time I invite _myself_ to Gary’s office. An air of desperation will hopefully wrangle me that offer.

I play all the cards I’ve got in my hand. I bat my eyes. I do the near tears thing. I explain about utility deposits and new phone activation fees. He makes a move for my pants and I back away a little and explain that our relationship is professional and I don’t want to mess that up. It’s a good line. I should have said that to Brian. What did I say to Brian? I think it was “now would be a good time to fuck me”. He seems to get what I’m saying. Can’t let him think I’m against _anyone_ touching me. That would be… well, counterproductive. He asks me to work a party he’s throwing on Monday night, my day off. I’ll put the shelves together some other day. I need to get into Gary’s place and see what I can find out.

Brian’s here. No surprise. I’m watching, as the traffic seems to move in small concentric circles. Groups of people that might not be distinguishable at close range become clearly delineated from where I am. After my break Gary moves me to a perch closer to the action. I watch everything. I wish I could take notes. I’m wearing orange spandex shorts, barely more than briefs. I've got rainbow wings attached to my arms so they flow when I move. I think I might be noticed taking notes. I mentally categorize everything. Brian’s dancing with a guy who’s taller than he is. I’ve watched him dance with a lot of guys. I have no idea why he picked me up last week. I’m not his type at all.

The guy moves on and Brian dances with the guy he was hanging out with the first night I worked here… Michael. He’s Horvath’s stepson, Debbie’s son, Brian’s best friend. He’s going to blow my cover when he finds out. He’s as subtle as a chainsaw. I’ve never seen anyone telegraph their feelings the way he does. He’s in love with Brian. I wish them both luck.

There’s a commotion and I look towards it. About ten feet away the guy Brian had been dancing with keels over. He’s on his side, shaking, or maybe convulsing. Brian moves towards him and a couple of bouncers take notice and haul the guy off the floor. Brian looks at me and then follows the bouncers. The guy didn’t look good. He looked dead. Even under the pink and orange lights, he looked blue.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian helped them until the EMTs came. He gave them what information he had, very little, and then headed back out to the dance floor. The music hadn’t stopped and the press of hot bodies didn’t seem to have lessened. Brian tried to read Justin’s expression but the blond just kept dancing and didn’t seem to have been affected.

He left at two, not sure when he could expect Justin. He was sure that he’d get the same cold reaction he’d gotten yesterday.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin almost raced out of Babylon. Gary was gone for the evening and none of the bartenders were willing to share information. They’d been chatty before. Now they seemed to have closed ranks. The other dancers didn’t seem phased.

Two guys had died at Pistol over the week and four teenagers had been found dead in the Squirrel Hill area, their tox screens positive for MDMA.

He knocked on Brian’s door.

“You okay?”

Justin nodded. “Fine. You?”

“Dazzling.”

“What happened?”

“Fuck if I know. He crashed.”

“Is he…?”

Brian nodded. “He was dead before the EMTs got there. Whatever’s doing this is doing it quickly. We’re looking for the wrong thing.”

“We are?”

“Overdoses don’t work that fast. It’s not what they’re cutting it with.”

“So what is it?”

“I have no idea. We have to go over the coroner’s reports again. We’re missing something.”

“You have them here?”

Brian shook his head. Can’t access them from my home computer.

“Print them tomorrow, we’ll go over them before dinner.”

Brian nodded. “You see anything?”

“No. But I got The Sap to invite me to his party.”

“It’s not The Sap.”

“He’s involved.”

“It’s too dangerous.”

“We’re back to this?”

“I never moved away from this.”

“I’m going…”

Brian’s head leaned in until he and Justin were sharing breath. “I want to kiss you.”

Justin had steeled himself for the controlling manhandling he’d expected from Brian. A bruising kiss, a searing touch, and then he was just supposed to roll over. He hadn’t prepared himself for that simple statement. He had no reply. He tilted his head back and let his own hand snake its way behind Brian’s head, pulling him in and delivering the searing kiss he’d been expecting.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
Brian was relieved. He hadn’t expected to ask permission, but he had. Worse, he was afraid he’d be denied. He hadn’t been. Justin’s mouth was on his. Justin’s teeth were nibbling at his bottom lip now. Justin was backing him towards the bed. Brian let himself be led.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Being a twat yesterday.”

“Sorry’s bullshit.”

“Not if you mean it.”

“You had a good reason to be.”

Justin was laying on top of Brian now, both still fully clothed. “I did?”

Brian nodded and then realized he wasn’t supposed to know what he knew. “I was being a controlling asshole.”

Justin laughed and kissed him. “You were. Don’t do that.”

“I’ll try.”

Justin ground his groin against Brian’s, “try hard.”

“Hard is easy.”

“You’re easy.”

Brian pulled his head back from the kiss. “Excuse me.”

“Please. I’ve had you how many times now?” Justin snapped his fingers. “Easy.”

Brian laughed. “Maybe. But so are you.”

Justin laughed too and the feeling of Brian’s arms around his lower back, and Brian’s chest moving with the effort of laughter felt good. Justin was tugging at Brian’s shirt. “This needs to come off.”

“Back to being demanding.”

“Didn’t know I’d stopped.”

“Don’t stop. You have a right to ask for what you want.” Brian smoothed Justin’s hair back from his face in what might be described as a caress

Justin rolled off of Brian in order to allow him a better angle from which to remove Brian’s pants. “No shit. How can I get what I want if I don’t ask?”

Justin’s fingers were working the button on Brian’s. Brian bit his bottom lip. Justin sighed. “Look, I’ve got a control issue, I would think, you, of all people, would get that. Now could you please stop thinking about what I don’t like and start paying really close attention to what I do?”

Brian nodded and Justin was moving Brian’s jeans over his hips. “I like the way you smell.”

Brian’s sat up a little as he pulled his shirt over his head. Justin stood up between Brian’s knees, which were now hanging off the edge of the bed frame. He dropped his pants. “I like the way your eyes get dark when I’m naked.”

Brian’s hands reached out towards Justin. He didn’t touch him. Justin took a step forward and leaned his head back a little. “I love the way it feels when your hands are on my waist and your mouth is on my neck.”

Brian’s mouth found Justin’s neck.

Brian wanted to move, to pull Justin forward, but he was hesitant. He waited.

“I love it when you stroke my cock.”

The words were delicious the feeling was unbelievable. He wrapped his hands around Justin’s shaft and stroked slowly.

Justin moved forward until his hands were around Brian’s head holding his mouth to his chest. “I love it when your tongue plays with my nipple ring.”

Brian’s face brushed against Justin’s chest as he found and worried the silver ring and the nub to which it was attached.

Justin’s hands moved from Brian’s head to his shoulders and pushed him backwards. He wrapped his arms around Brian and rolled them until Justin was on his back and Brian was on top of him, his mouth still working Justin’s nipples. His hands following the line of his waist and hips. Justin used his foot as leverage against the mattress and pushed his body back up onto the bed. Brian’s body followed as if attached by the mouth to Justin’s nipple.

“Brian, Christ, you’re good at this.”

Brian smiled and fought back the strong urge to move lower. He could feel Justin’s cock, leaking and hard. He moved his hand to touch it but then felt Justin’s fingers in his hair and a pressure on his head. He moved his mouth lower, tracing his sternum.

“I love it when your mouth is on me.”

Brian moved lower licking at Justin’s cock. Moving to his balls and pressing on the spot just behind them.

He felt Justin’s legs spread further apart. “I love it when your tongue is inside me.”

Brian’s hands moved cautiously to Justin’s ass, spreading his cheeks and licking softly at his hole.

He felt Justin’s body respond and flicked his tongue repeatedly over his hole until it was wet and ready and then he pushed his tongue in. Justin angled towards him, opening up to him and Brian’s relief was disconcerting so he ignored it and concentrated on holding Justin open and alternatingly fucking and licking at him until he could feel the tension in Justin’s body begin to build. Brian wanted to fuck him, thought Justin might be ready, wasn’t sure. Justin’s hands were on Brian’s, pulling at them, pulling Brian up until they were kissing again.

Brian was lost in the kiss. He wanted more but he’d wait. He’d tried to take control; the results had been less than satisfactory to either of them. He kept kissing the blond whose body was showing every sign of being ready. Brian still held off. His hands stroking, and reveling in the feel of soft flesh.

He pulled his head back a little. Justin’s eyes were narrow and his skin was flushed. “I love it when your cock is inside me. Filling me.”

Brian moved for a condom and lube and as he did Justin rolled over. Brian wanted him on his back, wanted to be able to see his face. He risked it. “I love watching you come when I fuck you.”

Justin rolled over again, his legs wrapped around Brian’s waist. Brian moved slowly, inching into Justin, taking him carefully. Justin curved his body to take more. “I love it when you fuck me like I’m not some little china doll.”

Brian smiled and began to pound into him. He watched as Justin tucked his chin down against his chest and then leaned in and kissed him again. His hands were around Justin’s back now. Justin wrapped his arms around Brian’s neck. “I love it when you fuck me.”

Brian moved harder. Justin bit down on his bottom lip. Brian pulled out almost all the way and then drove back in. Justin grunted and smiled. Brian was holding off. He wanted to see Justin come. He wanted Justin to come while he was still inside him. He slowed down, moving his hand between them to stroke Justin to orgasm, inside and out. Justin grunted and then moved his body to grant Brian access to all of him. “I love it when you come inside me.”

It was all Brian needed to hear. He let go. His orgasm rippling through him. He felt Justin’s shudder and vibrate out of him and into his hand. Brian was about to pull off of Justin but Justin’s arms were around him. “I love it when you stay inside me.”

Brian let his head fall into the crook of Justin's neck. He felt Justin’s fingers carding through his hair and sighed against the smooth pale skin. They both fell asleep.

Almost an hour later Brian woke up removed the condom and rolled off of Justin’s body. Justin woke up and yawned.

“Shit.”

“What?”

“I fell asleep. I should go.”

“We’ve got work to do tomorrow. You can stay.”

Justin nodded and rolled onto his side. He fell asleep.

Somewhere around noon Brian woke up. He used the bathroom and started coffee. He had to go into the station to get the coroner’s information. He drank the coffee quickly and pulled on a pair of jeans.

He was back within an hour and Justin was still asleep. He poured him some coffee and sat down on the side of the bed. Justin woke up and smiled, taking a large gulp of the strong brew. He closed his eyes and Brian wasn’t sure which gave Justin more pleasure, orgasms or strong coffee. He liked to think it was the orgasms. The look on Justin’s face made him hesitant to bet on it.

When Justin put the coffee down Brian leaned in to kiss him.

Justin sighed. “You know, the scheduling thing might really become an issue soon.”

Brian shook his head. “I’m working the night shift now we’re synced.”

“Hardly, but our schedules are closer.”

“It’s a start.”

Justin nodded. “You should go get those reports.”

Brian waved the sheaf of papers at Justin. “Right here.”

“Anything interesting?”

I haven’t really had a chance to look at them.

Justin stood up and pulled on his jeans. He took his coffee and moved to the sofa. “Give ‘em to me.”

Brian handed the papers to Justin and poured himself another cup of coffee.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Justin started leafing through the reports but he wasn’t sure what he was looking for. Brian was watching him with a bemused expression. “Do you even know what you’re looking at?”

“Sure, coroner’s reports.”

“Do you know what you’re looking for?”

“Um…” Justin dropped the papers and took another gulp of his coffee. “No clue.” Can I shower?”

“Can I join you?”

Justin smiled and headed towards the bathroom. Brian followed. When they were clean, and once again acquainted with the feel of the other’s cock in their mouth they returned to the sofa and the papers. Brian scanned them carefully.

“They were all positive for MDMA, but why is it only killing some of them?”

“The tox reports don’t find anything else out of the ordinary? No other drugs, no opiates or poisons?”

Brian shook his head. “Trace amounts of bullshit. A lot of high THC levels, but nothing that would kill someone.”

Justin yawned. “I should get home. I’ve got to change before we go to Horvath’s. What time are we supposed to be there?”

“Six. Be back here by five.”

“Brian, it’s four now. I’m not racing there just to race back here.”

“Then wear what you’re wearing.”

Justin looked down at his faded corduroys; he glanced over at his silver and white t-shirt currently in a heap on the floor. “Don’t think so. I’ll meet you there.”

Brian sighed. “I’m not getting anywhere with these, and it’ll be faster if I drive you.”

“I can’t be seen with you.”

“Duck.” Brian smirked.

“Fuck off, I’m not blowing you in your Jeep.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s against the law.”

“It is?”

“Probably. Everything fun seems to be. Look, take me to my place, I’ll change. Then we can go straight to dinner.”

Brian nodded.

Justin smiled. “That gives you…” he looked at his watch. Forty seven minutes to fuck me.”

Brian faked reluctance, for about three seconds.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian headed towards Justin’s apartment. After a sharp left and a hard right he realized Justin was glaring at him.

“What?”

“You’re heading towards my place.”

“Isn’t that where we’re going.”?

“I didn’t tell you where it was.”

“Oh. Right… um, right or left?”

“Brian?”

“I might have checked your driver’s license.”

“It still has my old address on it.”

“Oh, then I’m probably taking you to Pitcairn.”

“Brian.”

“Justin, I saw your basic information. I know you live on Humber. Okay?”

“No. Why were you reading my file?”

“Why would I?”

“That’s what I’m asking.”

Brian pulled up to the apartment complex. “This is it right?”

Justin undid his seatbelt and got out of the car. “Stay here, I’ll be right down.”

Brian nodded, unbuckled his own seatbelt and followed him.”

“Brian.”

“Justin, we could have the argument and _then_ I’ll go up with you, or we could just skip the argument.”

Justin took the steps. Brian followed. Justin unlocked the door and Brian noted that he didn’t have a deadbolt.

“You should have a deadbolt.”

“You should adopt a child from a third world country.”

“Huh?”

“The worrying thing. I don’t need another parent. I’m an officer of the law Brian, I can take care of myself.”

“You’re an officer of the law. You should know better than to have inadequate locks on your doors, especially in this neighborhood.”

“There’s nothing wrong with this neighborhood.”

Brian was about to say something else when finally took a real notice of his surroundings. “ You’re very neat.”

Justin was rummaging through a duffel bag. “Fuck off. I haven’t had time to unpack anything yet.” He found a pair of jeans that looked clean. He moved to a suitcase to find a shirt that wouldn’t need ironing.

Brian wandered around the place with an air of distaste. It was a box. Living room, galley kitchen. A good-sized bedroom with a dresser, ugly drapes and… the kid wasn’t lying… a bed covered in books.

“Justin.”

“Yeah?”

“There are books all over your bed.”

“Yeah.”

“I thought you were…”

“I thought you were gonna adopt a child from Namibia.”

Justin finished shaving and came out of the bathroom. He was wearing a deep burgundy button down shirt and jeans. He pushed his wallet into his back pocket and grabbed his keys. “Let’s go.”

Justin walked out and locked the door behind them.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

They got in the car and Brian wasn’t sure what to say. He’d never really seen Justin in his own adult clothes before. He wanted to take them off of him. Now. “Nice shirt.”

“Thanks. So, who’s going to be there?”

“Debbie and Carl, their son Michael, I’ve mentioned him, a couple of our friends. Ted, my accountant, and Emmett… he was at Babylon with Michael.”

Justin nodded. “Wait, your accountant comes to dinner at Horvath’s?”

“Debbie’s but yes. He’s a friend.”

“And your accountant.”

Brian sighed. “Ask what you want to know.”

“Are you on the take?”

Brian laughed. “Direct.”

“Are you?”

“No.”

“So how can you afford your place and your clothes? You can’t make _that_ much more than I do.”

“I have my resources.”

Justin shook his head. “You’re not going to tell me are you?”

“No.”

“Fine. So…”

They were at a red light. Brian pulled Justin towards him for a kiss.

Justin smiled. “What was that for?”

Brian shrugged. “Felt like it.”

When they got to Debbie’s Brian couldn’t tell who was more nervous but he hoped it was Justin. There was no reason for him to be nervous. They opened the door and Debbie descended on them.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin found himself being clucked over by a very colorful redhead. Horvath was standing next to her. “Deb, leave the kid alone.”

Brian steered him towards the living room and scooped Gus off of Lindsay’s lap. “Hey sonny-boy.”

Justin looked over and was not sure what to do with the image of the Brian he knew standing and holding a child who couldn’t be more than a few months old.

“Brian, are you going to introduce us?” The blonde woman was smirking at Brian, a petite brunette sitting on the edge of the chair.

“Mel, Lindsay, this is my new partner, Justin. Justin, this is Melanie, and Lindsay.”

Justin moved toward Brian. “Cute kid.”

“Thanks.” They all said in unison.

Justin looked at Brian. “Your kid?”

Brian shrugged. “Their kid. I’m just the sperm donor.”

“Your kid.”

Brian nodded and handed Gus back to Lindsay. He turned his attention to Michael and Justin sat down. “His kid?” He looked at Melanie who was smiling at Lindsay. “Our child.”

Justin nodded. They were raising him, he got that… Brian loved his son, he got that too.

Eventually they were all called to dinner and Debbie began the interrogation.

Justin wasn’t sure what she was worried about. He tried to steer the topic to anything other than himself but it didn’t work. Debbie made sure she knew his age, his mother’s involvement in his life, his mother’s involvement in PFLAG, his address, his blood type, his waist size, and would not have been surprised if she’d asked for his cock size too.

“So you and Brian.”

Justin nodded. “We’re working together.”

“More than work I’d bet.” She let out a laugh and Justin bit his lip.

“Nope, nothing more than work. That’s all we do.”

Debbie clearly didn’t believe him. Horvath looked like he very much _wanted_ to believe him.

“You got any leads?”

“You dance at Babylon!”

Justin looked up to see Michael finally recognize where he’d seen him before.

“Shhhh. I’m not supposed to moonlight, don’t tell my boss.”

Brian laughed.

“You dance at Babylon.”

“I should start going to Babylon again.” Ted said as he lifted a fork to his mouth.

Emmett was sitting near him and ran a hand through Justin’s hair. Justin moved his head away.

“Why are you dancing at Babylon?”

“Mikey, let it go. We’re working on something.”

“Is he scoping out the fresh meat for you?”

“I don’t need an assistant.”

“How’s it going?” Horvath interjected.

Justin was grateful to be back on comfortable ground. “Someone died last night.”

“Elliot.”

“That was the guy’s name?”

Emmett nodded. “I um… met him once.”

“You fucked him.” Deb clarified.

“He was nice. It’s a shame what happened.”

“Well, we’re trying to figure it out.” Horvath added.

“Not soon enough for me.”

Horvath looked at Debbie. “I’m doing what I can.”

“Yeah, we’ll talk about it tomorrow.” Brian added.

After dessert Brian went out for a cigarette. Justin joined him.

“Your family’s.”

“Insane.”

“I was going to say nice. Why are you always such an asshole?”

“Part of my charm?”

“Believe me when I say, NO.”

“I always believe you when you say no.”

“Brian.”

“Mmm?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“I didn’t mean anything by the adopting a child. I didn’t know you had a son.”

“I didn’t tell you.”

“Well, yeah, but…”

“Justin…”

“Yeah.”

“Let it go. It’s not about Gus.”

“Then what?”

“Nothing. I just wanted a cigarette.”

“Okay. We should get going. I need sleep. I’m working The Sap’s party tomorrow and I have some shit to do at home.”

“Cleaning?”

“Fuck off, we can’t all have mysterious incomes and a maid service.”

“Justin, you can’t sleep in that bed.”

“I can. I do. It’s my bed.”

“Justin…”

“Brian. Just take me home.”

Brian nodded and they said their goodbyes.

On the ride home Brian tried to find a way to say something about Justin working the party. Justin was a cop. He was a fully-grown man. He was about to get himself into a shit load of trouble. Brian dropped Justin off in front of his building. “Call me before you leave. If you’re going. And if you go, check in when you’re done.”

“I’ll call you when I get home. I am going.”

“Check in.”

“Calling is checking in.”

“Justin. Check in.”

“There’s that ordering me around thing again, I thought we talked about this.”

Justin walked into the building and noticed that Brian didn’t drive away until he was inside the elevator. He closed his eyes and tried to figure out how to get Brian to back off… and wondered how much of his file he’d read… how much information had transferred from Pitcairn. How much Brian knew.

Once he got upstairs he wasn’t tired. He pulled one of the books from the pile on his bed and read until he couldn’t keep his eyes open.


	4. Chapter 4

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Four   


* * *

  
  


 

On Monday Justin woke up at a reasonable hour and tried to get a few things accomplished in his apartment. He found the box with hangers and began putting things into his closet. The dresser was almost full when he was done and he realized that other than the two shirts he’d worn already he hadn’t brought anything that would work for Gary’s party. He sorted through his shirts again considered his options. Eventually he shoved some of the money he’d made dancing into his wallet. He’d remember to keep the receipts. This was a legitimate expense of the job.  
  


He headed out to Liberty Avenue. It couldn’t hurt to be seen, even when he wasn’t working. His first stop was Torso. The mannequin was displaying something trashy and possibly ideal. He scanned the racks and was about to pull something down to try it on when a vaguely familiar voice greeted him.  
  


He turned. “Oh, hi.”  
  


“Justin, what are you doing here baby?”  
  


“Needed something to wear to a party.”  
  


Emmett frowned. “You know, those functions are usually a little more…”  
  


Justin shook his head. “Different kind of work party.”  
  


Emmett smiled. “Oh.” He leaned in conspiratorially. “A _work_ party.”  
  


“Shhhh.”  
  


“Right, top secret, undercover. Got it.”  
  


Justin wasn’t sure he had gotten it but he did lead him to a couple of shirts that would serve his purposes. He paid and left. He was excited about tonight. He was sure he’d find some proof, some clue at The Sap’s and really, that’s what he needed.  
  


He was considering what he might find when he neared the diner. A cup of coffee, and maybe a burger didn’t sound like a bad idea. He walked in and realized it was. He’d forgotten this was _the_ diner. The one where Horvath’s wife worked. She greeted him exuberantly and he wondered if she might blow his cover but then she pointed him towards a booth and greeted the next customer in a similar manner. No one was paying attention.  
  


Justin amended that when he put down his menu and scanned the room. Brian was sitting at the counter, cup of coffee in one hand, newspaper in the other. He wasn’t reading though. He was staring at Justin. Justin shook his head almost imperceptibly. If Brian sat down next to him he was fucked. Brian got the message.  
  


Justin finished lunch, took his new purchases and decided to take the bus back home. Brian walked by him as he was moving towards the bus stop. “Come to my place. You can change there.” Brian didn’t even slow down as he said it.  
  


About a minute later Justin let himself into the back entrance to the building and took the stairs to Brian’s door. It was open. Brian had shed his shirt and shoes. His jeans were unbuttoned at the top and Justin stopped for a moment to appreciate the sight.  
  


“Close the door.”  
  


“You were that sure I’d come?”  
  


Brian smiled. “Did you really want to take an hour’s bus ride just to change your shirt?”  
  


Justin laughed. “No. That’s why I’m here.”  
  


Brian moved closer to him. “No it isn’t”  
  


And Justin had to admit, no, it wasn’t.  
  


“Maybe part of the reason I’m here.”  
  


“And what’s the other part?”  
  


“Well, I’m sure as hell not going to let anyone at The Sap's fuck me, and I’m not really in the mood for The Adonis, and you know, you’re convenient.”  
  


“Convenient?”  
  


Justin nodded. “Geographically. I was already at the diner, you’re closer than the Gravel Pit.”  
  


Brian laughed. “You’ve been to The Gravel Pit?”  
  


Justin was taking off his shirt and moving towards the bed. “I’m not really concerned with your believing it or not. I’ve been there a couple of times.”  
  


Brian’s hands were on his waist. His neck was bent so that he was looking Justin in the eye. He was clearly amused. “When?”  
  


“When I was up here interviewing, and then when I got the job, I had to find an apartment before I moved, so…”   
  


Brian looked a little less self-satisfied. Justin laughed. “Brian, it would, in general, be helpful if you could remember that I _dress_ like a twink, because I’m undercover, but I am, as I’ve so often reminded you, a police officer. A fully grown adult.”  
  


Brian’s hands moved over Justin’s cock, still encased in black cotton briefs. “Fully grown.”  
  


Justin nodded. His hand moving towards Brian’s fly. “Fully grown. Just like you.”  
  


The fell together onto the bed. Brian’s mouth exploring and sensitizing every inch of flesh in an almost systematic fashion.  
  


Justin closed his eyes and let the sensations wash over him. Brian’s hands were firm and steady as he lifted Justin’s legs and put them on his shoulders. Justin reached up, trying to touch Brian but then just let his hand fall back at his sides.   
  


Brian pushed into him slowly and Justin curled his back until only his shoulders were on the bed. He squeezed his ass around the base of Brian’s cock and smiled, satisfied, as Brian let out a groan.   
  


Brian folded him in half then, kissing him deeply as they rocked together. Justin’s hands finding purchase on Brian’s back. Brian’s hands running through Justin’s hair. When they came together Brian pulled off of Justin and Justin rolled over to kiss Brian again. Brian lifted his arm and Justin laid his head on Brian's shoulder, enjoying the feel of Brian’s arm across his back and resting lightly on his hip.  
  


Justin’s arm was flung across Brian’s torso. Brian lit a cigarette one handedly.  
  


“So you get something disgustingly twink-like at Torso?”  
  


“Yeah. Emmett’s not that subtle is he?”  
  


Brian laughed. “Emmett’s alright.”  
  


“How do you even know him?”  
  


“He’s Michael’s roommate.”  
  


“But…”  
  


“ _Just_ his roommate.”  
  


“Does Michael have a boyfriend?”  
  


Brian looked down at Justin. “That’s really none of your business.”  
  


“I’m just wondering. He’s clearly…”  
  


“Clearly what?”  
  


“In love with you.”  
  


Brian sighed. “Maybe. He’ll get over it.”  
  


“How long has he been in love with you?”  
  


“Fourteen years.”  
  


Justin laughed. “You think he’s going to just magically get over it someday? Do you love _him_?”  
  


“He’ll find someone better for him than I am. I’m not boyfriend material. I love him as a friend. You don’t fuck your friends.”  
  


“So we’re not friends.”  
  


Brian sat up. “We’re partners.”  
  


“You know, in some people’s vocabulary…”  
  


“We’re not people, we’re cops.”   
  


Justin nodded, unsure why Brian had suddenly become so prickly.  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian’s POV  
  


So one minute I’m wrapped in warm blond, having a post coital cigarette, and the next minute I’m discussing a relationship that’s none of his business and then one I didn’t even know I had. This is why I don’t cuddle, leads to talking.   
  


I stub out my cigarette and grab a beer. I don’t offer him one. He’ll get one for himself if he wants. He does just fine for himself. I look over and he’s pulling his shirt back over his head. It’s a nice one; he really doesn’t dress like a twink when given the option.   
  


I assume he’s leaving but he’s goes to the refrigerator, see, told you he’d just help himself. He sits down next to me. He’s drinking water. I light another cigarette.  
  


“You shouldn’t smoke, it can cause lung cancer, heart disease, stroke, emphysema, bronchitis and bad breath.”  
  


“You shouldn’t go to party’s hosted by drug dealing sleaze balls. And I don’t have bad breath.”  
  


“I have to get into his house, and cigarette breath is not the world’s best aphrodisiac.”  
  


“Get enough on him for us to get a search warrant. I’m more likely to die in a car accident. Should I not drive?”  
  


“I’ll get enough on him tonight to get a warrant, but by then, we’ll also have a lot more information. Someone died last night, Brian.”  
  


“Not from smoking, and it was two people. A girl, 19, she was at a party at CMU, and a guy at Popperz.”  
  


“Shit, I didn’t know about the guy at Popperz.”  
  


“Fags dying in clubs rarely make the news.”  
  


“Yeah. Did Horvath call you?”  
  


“Debbie told me.”  
  


“Debbie?”  
  


“She knows most of Liberty Avenue. The hustlers, the club rats, the tourists.”  
  


“Really?”  
  


“Really.”  
  


The kid is smart but his common sense lacks something. Right, sense. When you need to know something you don’t ask the professionals. They’ll stonewall you. Waitresses, bus drivers, people in the service industry, they’re the ones who always have the best information, least diluted, and are usually more honest about it. I think about telling him this but decide it’s best to just let him figure it out for himself. He’s not going to learn anything from Gary and Gary’s not going to let him see anything he doesn’t want him to.  
  


“Can I use your shower?”  
  


I nod and light another cigarette.   
  


“Stop brooding, you’re being a stereotype. It’s unbecoming.”  
  


I laugh and put the cigarette out. He’s young and impulsive but his instincts have been pretty accurate, and he might learn _something_ I join him in the shower.  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


It was almost an hour later when they both emerged from the shower, a little more waterlogged, a little less horny. Brian watched as Justin changed into tight black jeans and a blue shirt made of nothing but nylon mesh. His nipple ring, his nipples, his torso, all clearly visible. Brian bit his bottom lip.   
  


Justin looked up as he was pulling on his shoes. “I’m a cop. Do I have to wear a sign to remind you?”  
  


Brian shook his head. Then nodded. “Maybe. You look…”  
  


“I know, I look young. I’ve always looked young. When I was born, I looked like a zygote, I’m sure.”  
  


“I was going to say you look hot.”  
  


Justin moved towards the door. “You always think I look hot.”  
  


“I do?”  
  


Justin turned around. “Yeah. You do. My clothes, Sap’s costumes, twink outfits. Whatever. I wear it and you slide your hand under it.  
  


Brian pulled away realizing that was exactly what he’d been doing, inching his hand under Justin’s shirt to touch the silver ring that seemed more obvious under the shirt than it was when he was completely naked.  
  


Justin laughed. “Don’t worry about it. I’ve got a great ass, and blonde hair, and you’re not the first guy who couldn’t keep his hands off of me.” Justin turned to go.   
  


“How are you getting there?”  
  


“Walking.”  
  


“And how are you getting home.”  
  


“Didn’t Horvath issue you a jet pack? I got mine when I got my gun and badge.”  
  


“You don’t have either of them on you do you?”  
  


Justin’s look went from amused to aggravated. “You think I’d take my gun or badge to this place? Do I _look_ like I’m trying to get murdered?”  
  


Brian nodded and Justin laughed.   
  


“I’m not. And no, my gun and badge are safely at home.”  
  


“But…”  
  


“Now you _want_ me to take them?”  
  


“How _are_ you getting home.”  
  


“Walking.” Justin was aggravated.  
  


“I’ll pick you up, call me.”  
  


“Right, because that wouldn’t fuck with my cover at all.”  
  


“Justin…”  
  


“Brian, I’ll call you when I get home.”  
  


“Here. When you get here.”  
  


“Here. I’ll call you when I get here.”  
  


“If you’re here you don’t have to call.”  
  


“Good, saves me the minutes. Don’t wait up.”  
  


“Don’t get killed.”  
  


“Deal”  
  


Justin turned and left.  
  


He took the elevator to the first floor and then went out the back way. It was stupid, but he really was concerned about people seeing him spending any excessive amount of time with Brian. He checked the address for the fifteenth time and headed towards The Sap's house.   
  


It was already dark, sometime after nine. He knocked and Gary escorted him inside. There were a several “boys” there but he only recognized one of them. The others apparently worked different shifts, or didn’t dance anymore. Gary offered him a drink but he declined.   
  


Gary walked him through the living room, a play room that looked fairly innocuous, a lot of leather sofa’s and floor pillows but no slings, no toys, and so far, no drugs or paraphernalia. He brought him back to the bar and then excused himself.  
  


Justin joined the other set decorations currently sharing a joint. He took a small hit and was about to ask them something when several men entered the room. The music started and the lighting changed. Justin wandered around, hands reaching out to touch him. He didn’t back away, nor did he move towards them. He plastered a smile on his face and when there didn’t seem to be anyone at the bar he poured himself tonic water with lime. The bartender came back at that moment and added a shot of gin to the mix. “Stronger is better right?”  
  


Justin smiled a thank you and took his drink to the other side of the room.   
  


The lighting got lower and Justin used the small distraction to slip behind one of the doors Gary had specifically categorized as off limits. A long flight of steps led him to a basement. Wine, a lot of fucking wine. Racks of it. He moved around looking for something more condemning than… Justin picked up a bottle and shook his head, really lousy taste in pretentious Bordeaux. Justin put the bottle back and heard a voice calling down. He stayed quiet and then heard the door close. He continued to look around but found nothing. A small door off to the side revealed an actual storage room, but everything was dusty, a cobweb across the doorframe. No one had been in here in a while.  
  


He walked back upstairs and opened the door cautiously, slipping back into the hallway. “I thought I told you to stay out of there.”  
  


“Um, sorry, I was looking for the bathroom.”   
  


The Sap grimaced and pointed Justin in the right direction.   
  


Justin took a minute to get his breathing calmed a little. He had left his drink on the table in the other room when he’d gone downstairs. There was no way he’d drink it now. He let himself out and headed back towards the bar. The bartender made him another gin and tonic, liberal with the gin. Justin nodded a thank you and went back to mingling.  
  


The drugs were visible now. Lines laid out on mirrors and trays. A large hookah pipe in the corner where several men were congregated. One of the boys was being mauled by one of the guests but he didn’t seem to mind. Justin smiled at Gary as he offered him a joint. Justin took a hit and Gary scowled. “You could take your shirt off. You’re not here as a guest.”  
  


Justin nodded and when his shirt was thrown in a corner Gary offered him the joint again. Justin shook his head. Gary held it up to him, “loosen up.” It was a direct command from a superior, Horvath gave orders the same way, hell, so did Brian. He took a longer toke and exhaled as quickly as felt safe. Then he wandered away to find a non-disgusting party member to play nice.  
  


A couple of guys reached for him, one wasn’t so bad. Older than Justin usually went for, but then so were most of the guys here. He leaned into him and the weed helped. He felt relaxed. He breathed deeply and the man kissed him. He let him, kissing him back, not with a lot of passion but he didn’t bite his lip hard and knee him in the balls, so really, Justin thought to himself, I’m being very friendly.  
  


The man’s hands wandered and Justin closed his eyes and let images of anything other than this take over for a few minutes. “Derrick.” The man whispered in his ear. “Justin.”  
  


Derrick smiled and his hand was palming Justin's cock through his jeans. “Want to take this somewhere more private?”  
  


Justin nodded. He wanted access to the rooms from which Gary had banned the boys. This seemed the only way to get there. He was confident he could stop this before it went too far if he had to.   
  


Derrick took his hand and opened the sliding door off the hallway. They were standing in a small vestibule three doorways all open and visible. One room was occupied. One of the boys Justin hadn’t recognized was in a sling. From the sounds he was making, he was having a good time. So were the several men surrounding him. The next room looked interesting and Justin moved towards it. Derrick shook his head. “It’s just a supply closet.”  
  


Justin craned his neck; he leaned over a little further and stumbled. Derrick caught him. “You okay?”  
  


Justin laughed. “Little too much to drink.”  
  


Derrick smiled and tried to pull Justin in to the room directly behind them. Several couples were already there. It looked like a cushier version of the back room. Justin still wanted to go see the “supply closet.”  
  


He moved towards it again and when Derrick’s arm was no longer around his waist he felt like he might fall. The world was spinning and Justin dimly realized that something was not quite right. Derrick’s hands were in his belt loops again. Justin allowed himself to be led into the other room where Derrick pushed him back into a pile of pillows and quickly shucked him of his jeans. “Just relax.”  
  


Justin nodded and felt Derrick’s mouth on his cock. He leaned his head back and moaned, his own hand moving to his nipples. He came quickly, riding a wave of pleasure that was from more than just a mediocre blowjob.   
  


Justin’s eyes opened when he felt someone’s hands on his ass. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. He didn’t know how long he’d been out but for clearly longer than he’d intended. He looked around for Derrick but the man was gone. This guy, older, gray hair, and a crooked yellow tooth was not what Justin was looking for. He pushed the man’s hands off of his ass and stood up. His head swam but he was able to remain upright. He smiled.  
  


“Sorry, I need a drink.” He walked out of the room. He heard the guy curse and hoped it wasn’t going to become an issue. He was having trouble focusing but made it into the supply closet. There was a felonious possession level of drugs there. Justin wasn’t surprised but he wasn’t thrilled either, he needed to know what was killing people. It wasn’t the drugs themselves. He looked around, categorizing everything and hoping he could remember it later.  
  


He heard Gary’s voice behind him. “Taylor.”  
  


Justin plastered a wasted smile on his face and turned around throwing his arms around Gary. “There you are… I got lost.”  
  


Gary seemed to buy it. “C’mon let’s get you a drink.”  
  


Justin followed him and when he approached the bar the bartender poured him a gin and tonic. Justin tried to watch and see if he put anything else in it but he couldn’t tell, most of the preparation was done with the bartender’s back to him.  
  


He took the drink and knew he shouldn’t drink it but he was really thirsty. He drank a small sip and chewed on an ice cube crunching loudly. Gary led him to the playroom, which now looked significantly less innocuous. There were toys and groups of men in varying degrees of undress. Justin noticed he was naked. He gave Gary a crooked smile. “I lost my pants.”  
  


Gary laughed. “You don’t need them.”  
  


Justin moved towards the sliding door to retrieve them. Gary wrapped an arm around his waist. “Keep these men company, I’ll get your pants.”  
  


Justin nodded and sat down. Two men moved to stroke and lick him and he laid his head back and allowed them to do so. One of them was tonguing his nipple ring and the other’s mouth was wrapped around his cock. He moaned and then felt both tongues on him. He spread his legs a little and closed his eyes.  
  


When they were done they moved away. Justin kept his eyes closed for a moment. He needed water. His mouth felt dry, his skin felt hot. He stood up on shaky legs and took a quick look around. He found his shirt and pulled it on. Gary smiled at him. Justin smiled back. “Find my jeans?”  
  


Gary held them out.   
  


“Thanks, I really have to go.”  
  


Gary looked at his watch. “It’s early.”  
  


“It’s after three and I have to study a little tomorrow, and then I’m working.”  
  


Gary nodded and Justin checked his pocket for his wallet keys and cell phone. “See you tomorrow.”  
  


Justin gave him a brief nod and headed towards the front door. He’d wanted to get some pictures of the supply closet but he hadn’t gotten the opportunity. Still, he had enough to get a warrant.  
  


The air was cool. He walked for several blocks but his head still felt fuzzy. He continued to move and almost a half hour later realized he’d just made a large circle. He was lost. He called Brian.  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


Brian knew Justin was at the party. Brian knew it was a bad idea to let him go. And then he laughed at himself. _Let him_. He wondered if Justin had ever asked permission for anything in his life. He doubted it.  
  


He tried to distract himself. He went to Babylon, keeping his phone on so that he’d be available if Justin called. Brian kept his eyes open for anything out of the ordinary while Gary wasn’t there. Nothing struck him. There were men getting high, and yeah, you could buy some shit from the bartenders but several of the usual dealers were working their areas of Liberty Avenue. Brian had talked to them last week, and earlier this week, their business wasn’t dropping off due to any new players in town and they swore to him they didn’t know anything about the new shit that was killing people. Brian wasn’t sure he believed them but they had no real reason to lie. Dead customers were rarely repeat customers.   
  


He headed home after a boring blowjob and a few more minutes dancing with Michael. It was only one am. He didn’t expect Justin for a couple of hours. He knew he should sleep. He tried. It didn’t work. They should have given him a camera or a microphone. The idea that there was absolutely no place to hide it on Justin’s body for this particular detail just made Brian a little more concerned. No gun, no badge, no camera, and an allergy to some medications. He moved to his computer. There were reports to write, facts to compile. The Medical Examiner for the Squirrel Hill area had emailed him the preliminary findings. He looked at them blankly unable to concentrate.  
  


His phone buzzed against the table. He picked it up quickly and sighed. “Fuck. Off.”  
  


He had to remember to block his number before calling random tricks for a second go. Eventually he just lit a cigarette and told himself that he was not staring at the phone or the door. The phone was on his chest, and he could see both at the same time but that was merely coincidence. He’d fall asleep soon.  
  


Brian was drilling a hole through the door with his eyes when the sound of the phone startled him. He picked it up. “Where are you?”  
  


“I don’t know.”  
  


Brian felt an ice cube run down his spine. He didn’t remember pouring himself a drink or spilling it down his back, but he must have.   
  


“Justin.”  
  


“I’m… I think I’m lost.”  
  


“Where are you?”  
  


“If I knew that, I wouldn’t be lost.”  
  


“Are you outside?”  
  


“Yeah. It’s cold.”  
  


“Justin. Focus. Street signs? Anywhere?”  
  


“I can’t be seen with you.”  
  


“You’re lost. No one can see you when you’re lost.”  
  


“Oh, right. Wait. I think…”  
  


Brian tried not to worry about the fact that Justin had bought that last line. He wondered how drugged Justin was. “I’m near…um… Linton Street. Oh, there’s Centre Ave. It’s right there.   
  


“Justin, don’t move.”  
  


“Brian I’m fine now.” Brian heard Justin’s breathing become more rapid and then the sound of traffic. “I just need to…”  
  


“Justin, don’t move. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”  
  


“Can you bring a jacket? I’m cold.”  
  


Brian pushed his feet into a pair of shoes and grabbed two jackets from the hooks by the door. “Don’t move.”  
  


“Okay I won’t. It’s just that I… SHIT!”  
  


“What?”  
  


“Nothing. These cars are moving pretty fast.”  
  


Brian sighed. “Justin are you on the street?”  
  


“No.”  
  


“Then sit down.”  
  


“Okay. This sucks.”  
  


Brian started his car. “Yes it does. Can you see a street sign now?”  
  


“Yeah. I think I can.”   
  


Brian waited.  
  


“What’s it say?”  
  


“Oh. Centre Ave. They spell it like they’re British.”  
  


“Yes, they do. Is there another sign?”  
  


“Yeah, it says Heldman.”  
  


Brian held the phone between his ear and shoulder as he shifted the jeep into fifth gear and headed towards Justin.  
  


Justin’s teeth were audibly chattering over the phone. He found him sitting on the side of the road frowning. Brian pulled the jeep into the shoulder and handed Justin a jacket. He pulled it on, his hands disappearing in the length of the sleeves. Brian tried to help him into the car but he resisted.  
  


“Stop it, I’m not an invalid.”  
  


Brian didn’t say anything. He got back in the jeep and slid the sleeves up, rubbing Justin’s hands between his own. Justin pulled them away.   
  


“Just turn the heat up.”  
  


Brian did. He pulled Justin forward into a hug and almost flinched when Justin’s cold lips touched his ear. He pulled back and kissed him. Warming the almost blue lips. Sucking and nibbling to get the blood flowing back to them. Justin pulled away.   
  


“Brian, stop it. Just take me home.”  
  


Brian nodded turned his focus forward and merged back into traffic.   
  


“Fuck.”  
  


“What?”  
  


“Nothing, just… Sap’s definitely trafficking.”  
  


“And you had to taste it to make sure it wasn’t baby powder?”  
  


“I think the bartender slipped me something.”  
  


“Feeling better?”  
  


Justin nodded. “A little. Mostly just feel like sleeping for about a year.”  
  


Brian nodded and Justin took note of his surroundings. “Stop.”  
  


“You gonna puke?”  
  


“No. I said take me home.”  
  


“No.”  
  


“I’m not sure you noticed, but I didn’t phrase that in the form of a question.”  
  


“You don’t know what you took. You don’t know if what you took is the same shit that’s killing people. I can’t sleep on your bed; it’s covered in books. You’re going to have to sleep at my place.”  
  


Justin ran a hand through his hair. “Fine but…”  
  


Brian shook his head. “We’ll do that whole buddy cop bonding banter thing in the morning. Let’s just get you back to the loft.”  
  


Justin held his hands in front of the heater. “Actually that sounds good. I think we’ve got enough for a warrant.”  
  


“Good.”  
  


“But…”  
  


“I thought we just agreed we’d do this in the morning.”  
  


“Oh yeah.”  
  


Brian parked in the back and Justin leaned on him heavily as they took the elevator. He opened the door and Justin moved towards the bed. Brian grabbed a couple of bottles of water and sat next to him. Justin hadn’t taken off Brian’s jacket. He curled up under it.  
  


“Why don’t we take a shower, it’ll warm you up.”  
  


“Yeah, I could use a shower.”  
  


Brian decided not to consider any sinister meaning behind the words. He pulled his jacket off of Justin and Justin reached his hand over his head, pulling on the collar of his shirt until it slid off his body. He stood up and dropped his jeans.  
  


“Could have sworn you were wearing underwear when you left.”  
  


“Must have lost them.”  
  


“Justin.”  
  


Justin shook his head. His eyes closed. “Nothing more, actually, a lot _less_ than I’ve done before. Don’t get worked up.”  
  


“Justin.”  
  


Justin turned his back to Brian and walked towards the shower. Brian was behind him in moments. His hands wrapped around Justin’s waist. “You were careful right?”  
  


“I’m not some stupid teenager. I let a couple of guys blow me. I need to get in tighter with Gary and whatever operation he’s got going on.”  
  


Brian was massaging shampoo into Justin’s scalp. “What did you find?”  
  


“He’s got a room with seriously visible drugs. If he’s not the supplier of “clock” then he’s a heavy investor. He may even be the guy with the stamp. I’m not sure. But there are also your standard bags of powder, couple of kilos. If he’s not cutting it lethally he’s selling it to the guy who is. I’d bet on it.” Justin finished and then added. “Mmm, that feels good” as Brian smoothed conditioner into Justin’s soft locks.  
  


“I’m not sure.”  
  


“I am, it feels good.”  
  


“Not about that, twat. About Gary. He has the drugs, and I have no question he’s selling them. But manufacturing E? Babylon brings in thousands a night…”  
  


“Greed is an insatiable thing.”  
  


“Maybe. But why cut it lethally?”  
  


“Maybe he doesn’t know he is. Maybe he didn’t.”  
  


Justin turned around in Brian's arms and kissed him. Then moved behind him and soaped his back. “He seems to know what he’s doing. None of this is making a lot of sense.”  
  


Brian tried to focus but Justin’s hands were sliding between his crack. “You think it’s going to start making sense just because you keep dancing for him?”  
  


“I think I have a better shot than if I’m just another face in the crowd.”  
  


“Maybe.”  
  


“Brian, you have to trust me.”  
  


Brian felt the water sluice down his back. Justin’s mouth was following the trail until he was on his knees, his hands on Brian’s hips. His tongue sliding between Brian’s cheeks. Brian decided to trust him, at least 'til they were out of the shower.  
  


He leaned forward a little. His hands bracing himself against the glass wall. The water sliding over him. Justin's hands moving to part his cheeks. His tongue pressing against his hole, opening him up until he stabbed it home and then used a finger to reach further. Brian’s hand moved lower to his own cock and he rocked back onto Justin’s tongue and then into his own fist. Justin continued to lick and play with the soft flesh of his asshole. Nipping lightly and then soothing with a flat swipe of his rough and hot wet pink tongue.   
  


When Justin stopped Brian groaned and started to move his hand faster but Justin wrapped his own hand around Brian’s wrist and then pulled a little until Brian’s back was against the glass wall and Justin’s mouth was on Brian’s cock, swallowing him fully. He felt Justin humming around him and taking him into his throat, moving back, his lips sliding over his wet, slick shaft. Feeling so much better than a hand. His tongue sliding around the head and then over the slit before he moved forward and deep throated Brian again. He swallowed and sucked in his cheeks, creating a strong vacuum. His lips a hard hot pressure on the base of his cock. Brian exploded. Justin moved his head back as Brian came and when he stood up, he fed the results to Brian in a scorching kiss.  
  


Justin pulled back and giggled. Actually giggled and Brian realized that Justin may be more altered than he had originally assumed.  
  


“Christ what did The Sap give you?”  
  


Justin was rinsing his body and stroking his own cock. “I told you, I don’t know. Why, was I that bad?”  
  


Brian pulled Justin out of the shower and grabbed a towel, drying Justin’s hair and body and then his own. Justin moved towards the bed and pulled the duvet over him.   
  


“Still cold?”  
  


Justin nodded. “A little. And tired. I don’t know what that shit was but it’s making me feel loopy.”  
  


Brian moved closer to him under the blanket. He heard Justin’s teeth still chattering. His face was flushed red and his skin was now dry and warm. He reached a hand to stroke Justin’s hair away from his forehead. That was warm too. He couldn’t tell if his scalp was sweaty or just still damp from the shower. He motioned towards the water bottle. “Drink that.”  
  


“I’m not thirsty.”  
  


“Justin, your heart’s beating faster than usual and you’re hot to the touch. Drink it.”  
  


“Your dick is pressed against my ass. Water won’t fix what’s making me hot.”  
  


Brian sighed and rolled Justin onto his back, leaning over him. “Drink the water and I’ll think about fucking you.”  
  


“Fuck me and I’ll think about drinking the water.” Justin wrapped his legs around Brian's waist and pressed their cocks together. “C’mon.”  
  


Brian reached behind him and uncrossed Justin’s ankles. “Water first.”  
  


“Christ. And you say _I’m_ demanding.” Justin slid up from under Brian’s body and sat back against the headboard. He opened the water and drank half of it in a single swallow. He put the lid back on and thunked it down on the nightstand. “Now. Fuck me.” Justin wriggled back under Brian and rolled over. “Hard.”  
  


Brian laughed. “You’re drinking the rest of the water when we’re done.”  
  


Justin pushed his ass up against Brian’s cock and there really wasn’t anything left to say. When they’d both come, again, and Justin had finished the rest of the water they slept. Brian left an arm slung over Justin’s hip and one under his neck. He assured himself this was merely to make sure he was aware if Justin got overheated or went into convulsions.  
  


He gritted his teeth as Justin moved closer to him, his ass pressing against Brian’s groin.  
  


Brian didn’t lift his head but he knew, if he looked, he’d see a very satisfied grin on a very satisfied blond.  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


 


	5. Chapter 5

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Five 

* * *

  
  


 

Brian felt Justin move against him. He opened his eyes and panicked. Justin was sweaty and shaking, thrashing against him. He moved his arm to avoid an elbow in the ribs and to hold Justin down, make sure he didn’t swallow his tongue, call someone, do something. Justin struggled under him and when Brian released his grip Justin sat up.   
  


He watched as Justin took a couple of deep breaths and ran a hand through his hair. He reached for the water bottle and realizing it was empty, pulled on his jeans and shirt. Justin was moving towards the door before Brian said anything.  
  


“Justin.”  
  


He turned, seeming a little startled. “What?”  
  


“It’s only seven in the morning.”  
  


“I know. I have to get home.”  
  


Brian stood up and moved towards Justin. “What happened?”  
  


“Nothing.”  
  


Brian took Justin’s hand. “Come back to bed. Sleep. Later, much later, you can tell me what the hell just happened.”  
  


Justin shook his head. “I’ve gotta go home. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”  
  


Brian released Justin’s hand shaking his head. “We need to go down and file the warrant.”  
  


“We? I’ll do it on my way home.”  
  


Brian just stared trying to figure out what Justin was thinking, or if he was thinking at all. “We’ll go together.”  
  


Justin moved towards the sofa and then turned sharply, almost walking into Brian. “Christ could you put some clothes on?”  
  


Brian arched an eyebrow but said nothing. He slid on a pair of sweatpants and a wife beater while Justin got a bottle of water from the refrigerator. They met back at the sofa. Brian had a notepad and pen with him. He waited.  
  


Justin seemed to be concentrating on the water bottle label, and removing it from the bottle in one piece.   
  


“Justin.”  
  


“Hmm? Oh, right. Gary’s house isn’t as big as I thought it would be.”  
  


Brian nodded, waiting for the information he’d wanted last night. “He’s got a room in the back.” Justin’s expression changed and Brian gripped his pen harder.   
  


“A room in the back…” he prompted after almost a minute of silence while Justin rubbed his temples.   
  


“There are drugs. He’s got drugs in the room in the back.”  
  


“Any idea what you took? Able to remember anything?”  
  


“Actually, um… memory seems more fuzzy now. Not sure why.”  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


Justin rubbed his temples and tried to stave off his panic. He’d woken up to a nightmare. The nightmare threw him a little; he’d thought he was past those. Long past them. Now he was trying to concentrate on giving Brian the information he needed, _they_ needed to get the search warrant but he was having difficulty. His memory of the previous night had some gaps in it.  
  


His head was hurting, and he still felt a little out of it. He was trying at the moment to remember how he got back to Brian’s loft, the last thing he remembered was a man with long gray hair and a crooked yellow tooth touching his ass. Someone blew him. He flinched inwardly. Had he let _that_ guy blow him. Had he let _that_ guy fuck him? He looked up at Brian who was grinding his teeth.   
  


He closed his eyes again and tried to picture the drugs. He’d seen them. A lot of them. He realized Brian had said something and was waiting for a response.  
  


“I’m sorry, what?”  
  


“Did you see anything that would give us a reason to search Babylon?”  
  


“No. Well…” Justin stopped to consider but he really wasn’t sure of what he’d seen. “No. Nothing that would justify searching Babylon.”  
  


“What did you see at Gary’s?”  
  


“Mostly a lot of naked men playing with a lot of naked boys.”  
  


“Just what every jury wants to hear, the eyewitness testimony of a party favor.”  
  


“Fuck you.”  
  


“You don’t remember much do you?”  
  


“It’s all a little fuzzy after…”  
  


“After what?”  
  


“It just all seems to blend together. The timeline’s gone.”  
  


“What’s the last thing you remember accurately?”  
  


Justin remembered a man whispering his name against his ear. He remembered the long gray hair and the crooked tooth, arms wrapped around him, keeping him from falling while he tried to get a better look at the…  
  


“Supply closet.”  
  


“Supply closet.” Brian repeated slowly.  
  


“That’s what he called it.”  
  


“What he called what?”  
  


“The room with the visible amounts of drugs, it’s in the back. There are a couple of rooms back there, behind the sliding door. A play room, with a sling and a couple of other back room setups and the supply closet, with copious amounts of…everything.”  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


Brian’s fingers clamped around the Mont Blanc pen in his hand. If it had been a cheap Bic it would have broken by now. He wanted to shake his partner, this cop, this _kid_ who was clearly not okay. He wondered what Justin _could_ remember, because it wasn’t much. And when he started to describe the back rooms his face showed visible discomfort. What the hell had happened in bed? Nightmare? Something.  
  


He listened as Justin told him what he knew, and had a feeling that Justin was leaving out large parts of the story. He wasn’t sure if he was doing it on purpose or because he didn’t have the memory to fill in those blanks. Either option pissed him off.  
  


“He’s got drugs in a back room of his house?”  
  


“Yeah, and a basement full of wine, but I don’t think that’s nefarious, I think he just has crap taste in wine.”  
  


“Okay, so what _is_ nefarious?”  
  


“Nothing. He has parties, everyone sort of knows what to expect, and gets what they want.”  
  


“Did you?”  
  


“Did I what? Know what to expect? Yes.”  
  


“And did you get what you wanted?”  
  


“I wanted probable cause to get a warrant.”  
  


“And if the judge isn’t willing to issue a warrant based on the testimony of a half drugged twink?”  
  


“He has no reason to believe the testimony of a half drugged twink, but I’m a police officer. We will get the warrant. But if we don’t, if you fuck up the paperwork, I’ll do it again.”  
  


Brian’s hand cramped around the pen and he was a little proud of himself when he didn’t throw it across the room. “Okay, let’s go to the station to fill out the forms and get them approved. We can’t be there when they raid the place. So you go home to sleep. I’ll call you when I know anything.”  
  


Justin shook his head. “We’ll file the warrant, and we’ll wait.”  
  


“Neither of us has gotten much sleep in the last week. We can wait here. We’ll hear the phone.”  
  


Justin sighed and Brian had a feeling he was going to get another diatribe on his methods of communication. He was wrong.  
  


“I’ll be at my place. I live there. I’ll sleep better there. Call me when we know something.” Justin was at the door and threw it open. “Let’s go”  
  


Brian was pulling on clothes. He drove them to the back of the station house. Justin was clearly uncomfortable and Brian wondered if it was because of what had happened in Pitcairn, or because he thought someone would see him and he’d blow his cover.  
  


They walked in together and Horvath greeted them at the coffee machine. “You two are up early.”  
  


“Up late actually.”   
  


Horvath looked over to Justin. “You haven’t slept yet?”  
  


“Not now Carl. We’ve got what we need to search Gary’s house.”  
  


“Great. Get it all filed and we’ll do it today.”  
  


Brian sipped his coffee and almost grimaced. How could coffee taste old at eight thirty in the morning?   
  


“You think they’re gonna offer him a deal?”  
  


Horvath shrugged. “Really depends on what we find, and what he’s willing to do to stay out of jail.”  
  


Justin nodded. “I think he’d do a lot. He doesn’t strike me as the type who’d do time for his business partners.”  
  


“Let’s hope you’re right.”  
  


Brian and Justin walked toward Brian’s desk to file the forms and take them to the DA, who would take them to the judge. He heard a few offhand remarks and would normally not have noticed. Fag jokes were part and parcel of being a cop. Even more so when you’re unapologetically out. Today he minded. Today Justin had to deal with them and Brian had a feeling Justin had dealt with enough homophobia from his fellow officers to last a lifetime. He walked more quickly.  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


Justin’s POV  
  


I’m glad he’s being quiet. I can tell the fag jokes upset him, which is odd, he’s never seemed anything less than fully open about who he fucks. I hate them, the fag jokes, but I’m used to them. I’d probably hate them less if they weren’t so stupid, if they didn’t miss the fundamental point of what it is to be a gay man. Okay, I’m intellectualizing. They probably would piss me off less if I didn’t have to wonder if the harsh and supposedly playful words were a precursor to harsh and “playful” actions. But fuck it. New force, new city, and they don’t seem to have done any damage to Brian. I’m safe, and if I’m not, I’m strong; I can take care of myself.   
  


I consciously stand up taller. I’m exhausted; I think Brian’s right. We’ve gotten 18 hours of sleep between the two of us in the last week. That’s just… not enough. I have to remember not to tell my mother that. Fuck, I should call her.   
  


Brian’s at his computer filling out all the information. The only reason I’m here is that without me it’s hearsay. Good thing they don’t drug test eyewitnesses. I have no idea what I took but it’s making my head feel like it weighs a thousand pounds. My body feels sluggish. I close my eyes and lean against Brian’s desk.   
  


The next thing I hear is a loud sound and I startle. Brian looks at me with amusement. “It’s the printer. You fell asleep.”  
  


I nod, not sure I can talk. My heart’s racing. “Tired. Are we done?”  
  


“DA’s office and then we’re done.”  
  


I follow him and someone calls out to me. I look behind me. What the fuck?”  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*  
  


Brian and Justin were heading to the DA’s office. Brian was hoping that Amanda was working and not Preston. Preston was always looking for an opportunity for a repeat performance. Brian wasn’t interested, he wasn’t that good in the first place. He was biting back the urge to smack Wilson and Jackson as they gossiped and joked like schoolgirls over their cubicle walls. He didn’t care. Their stupid fag jokes meant nothing to him, but he wanted to usher Justin past them as quickly as possible.   
  


He turned to ask Justin a question, hoping to distract him, when he noticed he wasn’t there. He was facing a newer member of their force. A uniformed officer who was apparently just getting off the overnight shift. Brian tried to remember his name. He couldn’t. He walked back over to Justin, standing next to him, his shoulder slightly angled, separating the two.  
  


“Billy, this is Brian, my partner.”  
  


“Billy, or William Holbright as his nametag pronounced, gave an odd smile.  
  


“We’re working together.” Justin clarified.  
  


“Sure, work. What the fuck are you doing in Pittsburgh?”  
  


“Same thing you are I guess. Pitcairn can get boring.”  
  


Billy nodded.   
  


“How long have you been here?”  
  


“Couple of months. Still working the graveyard shift. You?”  
  


“Doing some undercover work.”  
  


“You made detective?” Billy looked angry and Brian fought the urge to push him backwards, further away from Justin. Justin seemed to sense it because he took a step, not backwards, or forwards, just… further away from the both of them, and turned a little. “Not really. Just helping out.”  
  


Billy’s eyes raked Justin’s form. His black jeans from last night and Justin’s own gray sweater from earlier yesterday. His smile was knowing. “I’ll bet.”  
  


Justin shook his head. “I’ve got some work to do and a meeting with the DA. See you around.”  
  


“Yeah…”  
  


Justin turned and walked away before Billy could say anything else. Brian glared at Billy for a moment and then turned to follow Justin. He had a lot of questions. Experience with Justin told him they wouldn’t get answered today. Experience with himself assured him that wouldn’t keep him from trying to get the answers.  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**  
  


Paperwork filed they were back in the jeep. “My place.”  
  


Brian nodded and Justin relaxed against the seat. He wasn’t in the mood for an argument.  
  


“So Billy was on the job with you in Pitcairn.”  
  


Or a conversation. “Yes.” Justin replied without opening his eyes.  
  


“Were you friends?”  
  


“No.”  
  


Justin felt the car turn; he gripped the door a little harder.   
  


“Was he…?”  
  


Justin waited, a knot in his stomach. “Was he what?”  
  


Brian said nothing. Justin chanced a look over towards him. “Was he what?”  
  


“Just wondering if you worked together a lot. Is he gonna risk your cover?”  
  


Justin knew Brian was lying. The question didn’t even make sense. He once again wondered how much Brian knew about why he left the force in Pitcairn. The one thing he _did_ know was that he wasn’t in the mood to worry about it.  
  


The car swerved suddenly and Justin opened his eyes again. He was just in time to see Brian roll down the window and hear him turn up the music. Brian was as tired as he was. He hid it better.  
  


“Pull over.”  
  


“We’re almost there.”  
  


“Brian.”  
  


“Justin.”  
  


Impasse.  
  


Brian drove the next mile and a half hyper vigilantly and when he pulled the car in front of Justin’s building Justin shook his head. “You’re coming up.”  
  


“Aren’t you too tired to fuck?”  
  


“You’re not driving home this tired. You’re coming up.”  
  


“I’ll get some coffee.”  
  


“Brian. Now.”  
  


“Speaking of being ordered around.”  
  


“Now.”  
  


Brian closed his eyes, half in exasperation, half in exhaustion and then moved the car to a parking spot. He followed Justin to the elevator. “I’m just getting coffee. I can’t sleep in your bed.   
  


“Shut up. Please.”  
  


Brian was surprised to hear the please, so he shut up.  
  


When they got to Justin’s apartment there were two long narrow boxes in front of his door. “My bookshelves came.”  
  


Justin unlocked the door, pushed it open and tried to slide the heavy parcels inside. Brian helped and when they were finally clear of the door Justin shut it behind him. Brian locked it. He was about to mention to Justin again about doors, locks, safety and its importance when he turned around. Justin dropped his shirt onto a pile of like colored clothing. He stepped out of his pants in the doorway to his bedroom.   
  


Brian walked towards him and was startled when Justin lifted his duvet and with a forceful shake, knocked the contents of his bed to the floor. “There, now you can sleep.”  
  


“There are books all over your floor.”  
  


“Well, I’m not asking you to sleep on the floor.”  
  


Brian shut his eyes and then opened them, as if somehow, he might magically make the books organize themselves.  
  


“You sleep. I’ll get the bookcases together and the books put away, then I’ll join you.”  
  


Justin shook his head. “You are no good to me if you’re too tired to fuck me when I wake up.”  
  


Brian smirked and Justin gave him a dismissive glace. “Stop acting as if I find you irresistible. You’re convenient.”  
  


“Geographically.”  
  


“Especially if you’re already naked in my bed when I wake up.”  
  


Brian stepped carefully around the books and had to admit he was impressed with the eclectic nature of the collection, not a Harry Potter book in sight.  
  


Justin pulled the duvet up to his shoulders and settled his head down on his own pillow. Brian slid in carefully, as if afraid something might bite his toes. He put his head on the other pillow.   
  


“See, not so scary.”  
  


Brian huffed a sound that was neither agreement nor argument.  
  


Justin smiled. He leaned over and kissed the corner of Brian’s mouth. Brian’s hand pulled him in for a deeper kiss and Justin’s tongue was soon pressing between Brian’s lips, then he pulled away. “Now, sleep. Later, fucking, then, whatever else we have to do for the case, then, more fucking, and then more sleep.”  
  


“You’ve got our whole day planned.”  
  


“Is that a problem?”  
  


“Sleep, fuck, work, fuck, sleep. Sounds reasonable.”  
  


“Food.”  
  


“What?”  
  


“I forgot to add food but we’ll have to eat at some point.”  
  


“Maybe.”   
  


It was the last sound Justin heard before he slept.  
  


~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~  
  


Brian woke up the sound of Justin talking. He looked over but Justin seemed to still be asleep… and talking. He wasn’t making any sense. Brian shook him a little. Justin opened his eyes.   
  


“Justin.”  
  


“Hi.”  
  


“You okay?”  
  


“Raspberry frozen yogurt.”  
  


“Get up and we’ll go get some.”  
  


“That’s what will fix this.”  
  


“Raspberry frozen yogurt will fix what?”  
  


Justin laid back down and was back asleep, no, still asleep, Brian amended. His partner was fucking weird.   
  


He was awake, and not tired enough to go back to sleep. He stood up and cursed as a corner of a hardback bit into the arch of his foot. He stepped carefully out of the bedroom and rummaged around in the kitchen until he found the coffee. The coffee maker was new, and cheap, and he grimaced but made coffee. He found a set of mugs, none of which matched each other exactly. He took one out of the cabinet, washed it, and then poured himself a cup. He sat at the small tile topped table next to the kitchen in what he supposed was called a “dining nook” on the apartment floor plan and drank in silence waiting for Justin to start naming flavors again.  
  


When he’d finished his second cup he could no longer stand staring at the boxes, and the piles of odds and ends on the floor, and then back at the boxes.  
  


He opened one and read the directions. Allen wrench, glue and cam bolts in hand he began assembling the bookshelves. He finished the first one and considered waking Justin up to ask where he wanted them but decided against it. He put one next to the television and assembled the other, aligning it cattycorner with the wall next to the window in Justin’s bedroom. Justin didn’t stir.  
  


He moved quietly and put all the books on the shelf, ordering them by subject and then alphabetically by author. Fiction he separated into genres.  
  


He was placing the last one when Justin’s phone rang. Hoping it was Horvath with news he picked it up.   
  


“Hello?”  
  


“I’m sorry. I have the wrong number.”  
  


“Wait, are you looking for Justin?”  
  


“Yes, who are you?”  
  


Brian almost held the phone away from him and stared at it. “Who was he? Who was this woman calling Justin?” Then reality hit, “Justin’s asleep, can I take a message.”  
  


“Asleep? It’s four thirty in the afternoon.”  
  


“I’ll tell him you called. Whom should I say is calling?”  
  


He heard a familiar sigh and a cold coil of tension wrapped itself around Brian’s stomach. “This is Jennifer Taylor.”  
  


“Justin’s mother.”  
  


“Yes. You’re Brian I take it.”  
  


“I’m his partner.”  
  


“Tell him to call me.”  
  


“I will.”  
  


Jennifer hung up and Brian wanted to wake Justin up and yell at him, although he wasn’t quite sure for what.  
  


Brian startled when the phone rang while it was still in his hand.  
  


“I said I’d give him the message.”  
  


“Taylor?”  
  


“Who’s this?”  
  


“It’s Preston.”  
  


“Oh, hi. It’s Kinney.”  
  


“You’re answering Taylor’s phone?”  
  


“He’s sleeping. What happened?”  
  


“They found exactly what Justin described. And more. A lot of it’s going to the lab, we’re hoping we can find the toxin.”  
  


“And Gary?”  
  


“He’s willing to work with us.”  
  


“So…”  
  


“So Babylon stays open.”  
  


“And he knows Justin’s a cop?”  
  


“No. He won’t know that unless the whole thing goes to trial. We’ve got another team working with him externally. You two are going to stay on the inside. He doesn’t know you’re working the case. He doesn’t know Justin’s on the force.”  
  


“I’ll let him know.”  
  


“We may be able to get some big dogs on this one.”  
  


“Yeah, well, we do what we can.”  
  


“Talk to you later.”  
  


Brian hung up the phone. Justin sat up. His breathing rapid. Brian looked at him. “You okay?”  
  


“Yeah.”  
  


“Want some yogurt?”  
  


“What?”  
  


Brian shook his head. “Nothing.”  
  


“That’s my phone.”  
  


“Yes.”  
  


“You answered my phone.”  
  


“Twice. Call your mother.”  
  


“Oh fuck.”  
  


“She knew who I was.”  
  


“We’re close.”  
  


“The DA called.”  
  


“And?”  
  


Brian recounted the information while he watched Justin who seemed to be calming down. He wondered if he had nightmares often. He noticed Justin looking around. “My shelves.”  
  


“They’re nice.”  
  


“They’re up.”  
  


“And no books on the floor.”  
  


“You’ve been up a while.”  
  


“I guess.”  
  


“And you redecorated my apartment.” Justin’s eyes narrowed and Brian realized that maybe he had, and maybe that was a controlling thing to do, and then he thought about all the mismatched mugs with the handles facing every which way, and all the books on the floor and the bookshelves that were just laying in the middle of the floor and he decided that if anyone’s life needed a little more control it was Justin’s. He stood, his arms crossed at his chest. “You weren’t going to have the time.”  
  


“I might have.”  
  


“I made coffee.”  
  


Justin nodded and stood up. He tossed a few items of clothing from one pile to another and pulled on some sweat pants. He was staring at his cabinet of clean, ordered mugs and chose one, pouring the coffee and drinking it black. “You’ve got issues.”  
  


Brian sat across from him and shook his head. “Things have a place, I put them there, how is that an issue?”  
  


“These aren’t your things. This isn’t your place.”  
  


“You need to buy a couple of hampers.”  
  


“Probably.”  
  


“And more drawers.”  
  


“Possibly”  
  


“And an area rug.”  
  


“Excuse me?’  
  


“The living room looks…”  
  


“Like it’s not yours.”  
  


Brian decided the conversation was going in the wrong direction.  
  


“You said, sleep, fuck, work, fuck, sleep.”  
  


“And food.”  
  


“Is coffee food?”  
  


“No.”  
  


“We still haven’t fucked.”  
  


Justin smiled. Why don’t we fix that?”  
  


Brian stood up and offered his hand to Justin who accepted. “Let’s.”  
  


Justin fell back onto the bed and Brian’s dropped his pants and fell on top of him. Justin was still in his sweatpants and Brian could feel the warm damp heat of the cotton against him as both their cocks leaked on either side of the fleece. Justin moaned a little and Brian leaned in to kiss him, his hands pulling at the drawstring and sliding the soft material over Justin’s hips.  
  


Justin’s legs moved as he used his feet and the friction of the sheets to remove them totally. They were both naked now. Justin’s mouth finding the sensitive spot on Brian’s neck and nipping at it. Brian’s hands pulling Justin’s thighs around his waist, moving them ever closer.  
  


He pulled back, and Justin reached into the nightstand for a condom and lube. He handed Brian the condom and flipped open the bottle of lube himself. He drizzled it onto his hand and reached out, stroking Brian’s cock, covering it in the now warm liquid. He rolled over then, moving his slicked fingers to his asshole and coating it liberally.   
  


Brian wanted to grab his wrists, pull him away, plunge into him with abandon but he was too aware of how sudden moves sometimes affected Justin. Instead he pushed the head of his cock against Justin’s asshole.  
  


Justin buried his head in the pillows and Brian almost came when both of Justin’s hand moved to his ass. His fingers sliding gently against Brian’s cock as he pushed them into his ass and pulled himself open. Brian bit his tongue. He concentrated on the small scratch in the headboard, on the book on the nightstand that should be on the bookshelf. On anything that wasn’t the image of Justin wantonly spread before him. He pushed into him, feeling his head slide past Justin’s fingers and then feeling Justin’s hands pull out, leaving him inside the tight hot sheath that was Justin. His hand slid up Justin’s back and found it’s way to his hair.  
  


Justin moaned and pushed back against Brian. He was murmuring, “fuck me” then he was gritting it out, rough and demanding and Brian fucked him the way he was asking to be fucked, roughly, at a demanding pace. Justin met his movements with his own. His lubed hand jerking himself off while Brian wrapped an arm over his shoulder, finding his nipple ring and tugging at it.   
  


Brian felt Justin’s orgasm approaching. Watched his rhythm become erratic, felt his own body respond in kind. His free hand reached down to join Justin's in stroking him off, while he angled down and prodded at Justin's prostate, eliciting groans and a sound of almost surprise, just as he felt the warm flood of Justin’s come on his hand.  
  


The warmth combined with Justin’s ass convulsing around his cock brought Brian’s orgasm crashing over him and he collapsed on top of Justin’s prone form, his mouth worrying Justin’s ear. One hand trapped under Justin’s body he listened to Justin and was concerned. Was he crying? But he wasn’t. Justin laughed.  
  


Brian rolled off of him. “You’re laughing.”  
  


Justin rolled onto his back. Brian tied off the condom and looked for the trashcan. Justin pointed towards it. Brian shook his head and tossed the latex. “We’ll discuss the wrong-headedness of the placement of your trashcan in a moment. Why are you laughing?”  
  


Justin shrugged. “Happens sometimes.”  
  


“When you’re fucking?”  
  


“Yeah, you’ve never laughed in bed?”  
  


Brian thought about it. “No.”  
  


“More’s the pity. Sex is supposed to be fun.”  
  


“It is fun.”  
  


“But you don’t smile or laugh.”  
  


“It’s…”  
  


“What?”  
  


Brian sat up. “Nothing. Call your mother. I’m taking a shower.”  
  


Justin followed Brian into the bathroom. “I’ll call her tomorrow.”  
  


“She seemed…”  
  


“Worried? Pissed? Demanding? She’s a mom. They do that. I’ll call her tomorrow. She’ll live.”  
  


Brian shrugged. “Your funeral.”  
  


“How often do you call your mother?”  
  


“I’m not twelve.”  
  


Justin turned, glaring. He palmed Brian’s dick, wrapped his hands around it and stroked lightly, his gaze never wavering or softening.  
  


“I’m not twelve. I’m not a momma’s boy. I’m not some little twink, or a charity case. I’m an adult, who’s currently about to make you come harder than anyone should after they’ve just come harder than anyone should. I have absolutely _no_ issue with not fucking you again, with not being your friend, with not dealing with you in anything other than a strictly professional manner. I’m not threatening. I’m stating the facts. If you want to continue the way we’re going. Fucking, and working together and then fucking some more, you _will_ stop acting as if I’m a high school student who needs training in the ways of the world. Do we have an agreement?”  
  


Brian pushed into Justin’s hand and then pulled back. He pulled Justin to him and kissed him, gratified to feel Justin’s cock, hard and wanting against his hip. He wrapped his arms around Justin, practically lifting him off the floor as his mouth, his hands, his arms, his hips, all worked together to bring Justin to a frenzy. He laid him down then, ass against the bathmat, shoulders against the linoleum. Justin involuntarily wrapped a leg around Brian’s waist. His hands were in Brian’s hair and his tongue was sliding and curling around Brian’s. No part of them was separated. When Brian was sure Justin was lost to the feeling he stood back up. “I understand completely.”  
  


And he stepped into the shower.  
  


Justin stared at the ceiling, not sure what had just happened. That had never happened to him before. He’d had to tell other tricks, in no uncertain terms, that he was not some little fuck toy, some little gay boi, but he’d never had the tables turned so completely. Once his breathing was back to normal, his heart rate down to a reasonable facsimile of human and not jackrabbit, he stood up and joined Brian in the shower. As he knelt to lick Brian’s cock, sucking him into the back of his throat. Brian moaning, his hands fisted in Justin’s hair, Justin tried not to smile. A worthy adversary. It was novel, and exhilarating.  
  


When they got out of the shower Brian tried to decide what was more aggravating, wearing the same clothes he’d worn over here, or watching Justin riffle through a pile of clothes on the floor of his closet looking for a shirt.  
  


“Shit.”  
  


“What?”  
  


“I left the shirt I bought at your place.”  
  


“So wear a different one.”  
  


“Everything I own is…”  
  


“Is…”  
  


“Non twink like.”  
  


“I doubt that.” He looked at Justin’s mutinous expression, remembered his impassioned speech and rolled his bottom lip into his mouth. “I’m sure we can find something.”  
  


Justin shrugged and moved away gesturing for Brian to try his luck. Brian looked at the clothes hanging on the rack. He had to admit Justin was right. He may have the perfect twink physique but his taste was that of an adult. Button down shirts, sweaters in expensive blends of cotton, linen and wool, even his t-shirts were, Brian noticed, names he at least recognized.  
  


“I used to live with a guy who had a thing for labels.”  
  


Brain raised an eyebrow but said nothing. He was about to give up when something caught his eye. It was a long sleeve red t-shirt. He looked at the label and cringed. What he was about to do to this shirt was a crime. “Scissors?”  
  


Justin looked at him oddly but walked away, shirtless, in his khaki cargo pants. He held them out to Brian and then pulled them back. “What are you planning on doing?”  
  


Brian pushed the shirt over Justin’s head and then took the scissors from his hand as Justin pushed his arms through the sleeves. “Trust me.”  
  


Justin snorted. Brian gave him a look. Justin’s demeanor softened. “I hate this shirt.”  
  


“Good.” Brian pulled the fabric away from Justin’s body and made a snip he then slid the tip of the scissors into the hole he’d created and slowly, evenly cut the bottom of the shirt away from Justin’s body. He watched Justin flinch as the cold metal touched his skin.  
  


“Relax. I don’t want to hurt you.”  
  


He watched as Justin closed his eyes. Brian walked around Justin’s body, cutting slowly, and carefully. He kissed the back of Justin’s neck and continued around to where he’d begun. Justin stood up and Brian couldn’t take his eyes off of what he’d done. The pale expanse of Justin’s flat stomach. The red material that clung to Justin’s body, outlining his nipple ring. The soft downy hair that was just barely visible above the waistband of his khakis.  
  


“Do I need that sign?”  
  


Brian nodded. “And your badge, gun, passport, anything you’ve got. You look…”  
  


Justin moved away to view himself in the full-length mirror that was leaning against the wall. “I should probably hang this.”  
  


“I would have but I couldn’t find your drill.” Brian moved behind him, his hands sliding along the naked expanse of skin. His fingers gripping lightly and turning Justin around. “You look hot.”  
  


Justin was about to respond when Brian dropped to his knees burying his face in Justin’s belly, licking at the soft skin, dipping his tongue into his navel. Justin’s hands were in Brian’s hair. His eyes closed. His head thrown back. “You always think I look hot.”  
  


Brian didn’t bother to respond. He continued to allow himself to be intoxicated by the scent, feel, and essence of his partner. His arms wrapped around Justin’s waist, pulling him closer and then moved higher, palming his shoulder blades, moving forward and bunching the shirt up under Justin’s arms as he stroked his thumbs over Justin’s nipples.  
  


Justin let out a gasp and Brian could feel Justin’s erection against his cheek. Justin's hands moved from Brian’s hair to his own waistband. He dropped his pants and Brian let Justin’s leaking cock sit against his face, feeling the warmth, taking in the smell of Justin’s arousal.  
  


He pulled back a little and felt Justin move with him, towards him. He moved lower, sucking on Justin’s balls, nuzzling his nose at the spot behind them. He then showered Justin’s cock with light kisses and flicks of his tongue. Painting a wide swath from the base of his cock to the head. He flicked at the slit and felt Justin’s hands grip his hair even tighter. Eventually he took him to the back of his throat and Justin pumped into his mouth while Brian's hands left Justin’s hips and continued to stroke his torso, soft, pale, and perfect.  
  


He felt Justin close to coming and moved one hand slowly between his cheeks, tapping lightly at his hole, not pushing for entrance, just teasing him, adding to the sensations and pleasure. Justin gasped and came. Brian’s arms wrapped around his hips holding him up.  
  


When they were both a little more sure of their ability to stand Brian released his hold and stood up. He leaned down and kissed Justin, letting him taste himself on his tongue.  
  


Justin moaned into Brian's mouth and then bent over, pulling up his khakis and reexamining his red shirt. “I think this could work.’  
  


Brian smiled behind him. His broad hands almost entirely covering the tantalizing exposed flesh.  
  


“I think so too.”  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  


 


	6. Chapter 6

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Six  


* * *

 

 

Four days later Justin had learned little else. Brian was equally frustrated but not for the same reasons. Not _entirely_ for the same reasons. They’d gotten no further on the case, and two more people had died, but he and Justin both thought it was due to drugs that were still out there. The number of deaths had decreased. He was frustrated because he knew no more about what was bothering Justin than he had before.

After he’d spent the night at Justin's apartment he’d seemed to pull back a little. That night, he’d checked in with Brian, wearing the red shirt that ensured very little information passed between them, and quite a bit of heat did. He’d literally come and gone. The next day he’d called on his way home, assuring Brian that he was fine and simply tired. They hadn’t seen each other at all. Brian had stayed away from Babylon, unable to stop watching Justin when he was there, and knowing it was dangerous, for a lot of reasons.

He hadn’t heard from Justin at all yesterday and so this morning he’d gone to check on him. That had resulted in a diatribe from Justin about trust. And after Brian’s heart had slowed and his initial panic based on all the reasons he’d concocted that Justin had not contacted him abated, he went off on Justin about partnership and the meaning of working together and… Brian lit a cigarette and debated going to Babylon tonight. 

He was concerned about a lot of things, but mostly, he wasn’t sure why he was so fucking concerned about Justin. For that reason alone he decided to stay in, well, his definition of staying in. He went to Woody’s picked up a hot guy and brought him home. He was about to wake the sleeping trick and kick him out when Justin came through the door.

“It’s not locked. I thought you were the one with the lock issues.”

The trick sat up and Brian turned his attention to Justin. “It’s not even three, what are you doing here?”

“I didn’t stop to socialize.”

Brian wanted to ask what the hurry was but first he needed to get the groggy trick out. Justin handled it for him. “Fuck off.”

The trick looked at Brian questioningly. “Fuck off.”

The trick stood up, grabbed his pants and left. 

“If that guy recognizes me…”

“He’s from out of town.”

“You don’t know that.”

Brian shrugged, and lit another cigarette. “He said he was.”

“And random strangers are so often honest.”

“He’s probably married with kids.”

“Whatever, I’ll call first from now on. We can’t risk it.”

“I’ll have them out of here by two.”

“I wouldn’t ask that of you.”

“I’m offering.”

“Okay then.”

“Did you find something out?”

“I may have.”

Brian sat down, his feet resting casually on the coffee table. His eyes trying to focus on Justin’s face, but he was wearing a very tight white shirt with silver lettering and Brian was mesmerized by the contrast between the dark blue of Justin’s jeans, the pale smooth texture of the skin above his waistband and the white of the hem of his shirt. Justin sighed and took off his shirt. He straddled Brian’s lap and pushed his chest against Brian’s mouth. “Will you be able to listen to me better if you don’t have to mentally undress me?”

 

Brian laughed against Justin’s chest then he took the nipple ring between his teeth and tugged. Justin let out a low groan and Brian released his hold on it. “Yes, let’s pretend it’s all me.”

“It is.”

Brian’s hand lay flat against Justin’s belly and moved lower, under his pants, his fingers brushing lightly against the wet head of Justin’s hard cock. He raised an eyebrow. “Just me?”

Justin sighed again. “You should have seen this guy, he wouldn’t leave me alone.” 

Brian pulled his hand back. “Wouldn’t leave you alone?” his expression darkened.

Justin laughed. “Not like that, he just wanted to take my dance routine someplace private. He was fucking hot.”

“Why didn’t you go?”

“I still think The Sap is trying to figure out who turned him in…”

“You think The Sap hired him to seduce you?”

“Not sure.”

“You know…”

“I know… no one has to be hired to seduce me. He may very well have been a harmless guy with a thing for blond boy ass, doesn’t matter, not risking it there.”

Brian’s hand was back inside Justin’s jeans. “What about here.”

“Here’s good. Here’s not a risk…” Justin bit his lip and Brian wanted to crawl inside Justin’s head. What the fuck was he thinking about…what the fuck did he think was so risky?

“You think I’m a risk?”

“I think _we’re_ a risk. I think you’re too involved.”

“With the case?”

“With me.”

 

“We’re not involved.”

“Then what the fuck was that little queen out at my apartment when I didn’t call?”

 

“You call. That’s the rule.”

“But…”

Brian popped a button on Justin’s jeans and then another. He wrapped his hand around Justin’s cock, stroking lightly. “That’s the rule. Horvath set the guidelines. Not me.”

“Okay but…”

“No buts. You call.”

“I was just going to ask that you not bring up Horvath's name while you’re jerking me off.”

Brian laughed. He pulled Justin’s head forward and kissed him. 

Justin stood up, his mouth never really losing contact with Brian's. He shed his pants and was pulling at Brian’s. As soon as the condom was on Justin was back on his lap, lowering himself onto Brian. Brian's arms were around Justin’s back. His chin against Justin’s shoulder. “So what’d you find out?”

Justin let his head fall back, his eyes closed. “We’ll talk about it when we’re done.”

Brian planted his feet on the floor and bucked into Justin who ground down on him, making small circles and biting his own lip. Brian’s hand was stroking Justin’s cock again, moving to cradle his balls and press on his prostate from the outside while the head of his cock probed it from the inside. Justin almost fell off of the sofa with the force of his orgasm. He clamped hard onto Brian’s cock, almost painfully so. Brian came, wanting to bite Justin’s shoulder, knowing he couldn’t leave a mark. He sucked on it instead, nibbling softly, and hoped that this whole Babylon gig was over for Justin soon.

Justin pulled off of him and sat next to him, his legs propped up on the coffee table next to Brian’s. He sighed. “I needed that.”

“Glad I could oblige. So this guy…”

“The guy was nothing, but the bartenders are still dealing.”

Brian nodded. “It would look to suspicious if they stopped suddenly. Hanover and Montgomery are keeping an eye on it.”

“They’re idiots.”

“They were assigned to work with The Sap.”

“They’re going to fuck up our case.”

“We don’t have a case. They have no proof that The Sap's stash was deadly. And your memory of that night was so reliable.” Brian exhaled a long stream of smoke and Justin coughed dramatically. Brian glared at him. “You rushed over here with news.”

“I was talking to Morrison.”

“That’s not news.”

“You have to let me finish.”

Brian took another long inhale and waited. 

“He was starting to hint around at ways of making extra money without pedaling my ass.”

“You think the dancers are dealing?”

“No, I think _Morrison_ is dealing. I think he’s doing it without the express consent or knowledge of The Sap.”

“How is this news?”

“If there’s other drugs, not coming from Gary… the lab hasn’t been able to find anything potentially lethal from the bust at Gary's house. It’s possible that he wasn’t the last person to step on it, or not the person dealing the lethal shit at all.”

“Everyone dead had clock on him.”

“Name another brand of E out there at the moment.”

Brian thought.

Justin nodded. “Exactly” if they have E, they have clock. Gary had the stamp. But just because they had E doesn’t mean that’s ALL they had.”

“You’re running off in five different directions at once.”

“You have to admit it makes sense.”

“I don’t have to admit anything. They didn’t find anything else on the victims. No other pills, the crystal and weed that some of them had was clean.”

“So it’s something else.”

“Something else… like what?”

“I don’t know. Maybe Morrison knows.”

“Morrison is a kid, he doesn’t know shit.”

 

“He’s my age.”

Brian arched an eyebrow and the look on Justin’s face made him rethink saying anything further. 

Justin nodded and pulled his jeans on. He had his shirt in his hand and was shoving his feet into his shoes. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Where are you going?"

Justin turned around. He looked frustrated. “Home. Do we have to have this conversation every night?”

Brian shrugged. “You’re more geographically convenient when you’re naked and in my bed.”

Justin shook his head. “Not tonight, or tomorrow morning, or this morning, or…whatever. Christ, how do people work the night shift on a regular basis?”

Brian laughed. “Just come to bed.”

“I’m going home.”

Brian nodded. “Tomorrow.”

“See you then.”

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin walked down to the bus stopp and cursed. It’s was only four. The busses wouldn’t start running for another hour. He decided a run would tire him out, maybe so much that the nightmares would wake him. He’d been fine for months but working at Babylon, dealing with Brian, The Sap's party, all of it was apparently too much. He hadn’t been sleeping well; it’s why he refused to sleep at Brian’s, well, one of the reasons. He was usually able to calm himself down, get himself back to sleep but waking up, sweaty and shaking, and having Brian watch him do it, was not conducive to a sense of calm. 

He was less than halfway home when he caught a shadow in his peripheral vision. He crossed with the light heard the steps behind him. He stopped to tie his shoe and catch sight of, what he was sure, was another jogger out for an insanely early morning run. It wasn’t a jogger. It was the guy from Babylon, the one who’d wanted some alone time.

He smiled and stood up. The man approached him. “You always seem to be in a hurry.”

Justin nodded and began running but not towards his home. He didn’t want this guy to know where he lived. Justin knew it was irrational; the man had probably stopped and had a few drinks, and was now on his own way home. He was still wearing the same clothes. 

The man was walking fast. Justin increased his pace but the guy continued to follow. Finally Justin was frustrated and pissed off and now he was almost back in front of Brian’s building, and nowhere closer to home, and sleep. He turned around. “Fuck off.”

The man laughed. “I’m just…”

“Following me?”

“Maybe a little. I wanted to buy you a cup of coffee.”

“It’s four thirty in the morning and I just got off work. I’m not in the mood for coffee.”

“Breakfast?”

“No.”

“You seemed friendly at Babylon.”

“That’s my job.”

“And now it’s not.”

“No.”

“So…”

Justin was breathing hard from the run. He felt the cool air against his sweaty skin and shivered. He ran a hand through is hair. His scalp was damp. “What do you not understand about fuck off?”

The man shrugged and Justin turned and continued his jog. He was not going to enter Brian’s building, he ran past it and decided he’d stop at the diner. Public space, fluorescent lights, all conducive to making creepy stalkers go away.

He opened the door and his nerves jangled with the bells above the door. He sat at the counter and it wasn’t until Debbie had greeted him warmly and poured him a glass of juice that he noticed Brian at the end of the counter reading a paper. 

Annoying man, as Justin had dubbed him during his run sat next to him. “So can I buy you breakfast now?”

Justin shook his head. “I already said no. Three times I think, and fuck off. You’re really not very smart are you?”

Justin could feel Brian’s eyes taking in the scene and he wanted to scream at both men. Instead he drank more juice. Debbie brought him eggs and toast. “You been sleeping at all honey? You look tired. You’re sweaty. Are you getting sick?”

 

Justin swatted her hands away. “I’m fine Deb.”

The man leaned over towards Debbie. “Go ahead and leave his check with me.”

Justin shook his head. 

“This guy bothering you?” Debbie asked, and Justin knew that Brian was waiting, probably impatiently, for an answer. 

“No, we met at Babylon, now he wants to buy me breakfast. He doesn’t seem to understand that I’m perfectly capable of buying my own breakfast.”

Debbie pinched his cheek. “It’s on the house.”

Justin gritted his teeth and he heard Brian make a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh. He shook his head and ate a strip of bacon. “Thanks Deb.”

Justin finished his breakfast and swallowed the last of his juice. “I’m leaving, don’t follow me.” He was saying it to Annoying Man but hoped Brian knew it was aimed at him as well. He was heading towards home. His phone rang. Brian. “Meet me at the loft.”

“I’ve got to…”

“Justin, you’ve got a forty minute bus ride. If you want to sleep I won’t say a word.”

“I’ll see you there.”

Justin moved around the back of the building, watching for anyone who might see him. He slipped inside and took the stairs to Brian’s door. Brian was there before him. “Go to bed.”

Justin sighed. “Brian…”

“I’m not ordering you around. I’m telling you that Deb will have my ass, so will Horvath if word gets back to him that you’re not sleeping. And when you wake up, you can talk to me about stalker boy.”

“You mean Annoying Man? He’s a lot like you, can’t take no for an answer.”

Justin saw Brian’s face change; his look became almost blank. “Trust me, I can take no for an answer.”

Justin shook his head. “I didn’t mean…”

“I know what you meant. Do what you want.” Brian gestured towards the door, and then headed towards bed. Justin realized that Brian worked nights too now, and had probably gotten as little sleep as he had. He felt guilty. He pushed the feeling back. Stupid, worthless feeling. He moved to the bed and shed his clothes. 

Brian was already in bed, he pulled he duvet back and Justin slid between the sheets. Brian’s arm draped comfortably over his shoulder. His hand stroking lightly along Justin’s forearm. Justin slept.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian sensed the moment Justin fell asleep. His breathing more even, his body more relaxed and he allowed himself to worry. He’d been trying to avoid doing it for a while but now, lying here in bed, Justin’s warm body pressed against his he realized he might be in over his head.

Justin was confident, most of the time, but the momentary glimpses of vulnerability, the ones he knew Justin was working at hiding, had him concerned. He decided not to think about it. He decided not to think about how clearly he recognized those moments mirroring his own. Eventually he fell asleep.

When he woke up the seductive smell of coffee met him almost before full awareness. He looked at the clock, almost three. He wondered how long Justin had been up. Apparently long enough to make coffee. 

He was heading to the kitchen to pour himself a cup, scanning the loft for Justin. The bathroom door was open, the bathroom was empty. Towel hanging neatly and, Brian noticed as he brushed a hand over it, still damp. Justin wasn’t on the sofa, or at the table. Gone. Brian poured himself a mug and resisted the urge to call him. He was a grown man. He’d gone home. No reason for alarm.

His phone rang.

“Michael.”

“Hey, they’re playing Roadhouse at the midnight movie.”

“Can’t. I’m working.”

“You can miss a little sleep for…”

“Working nights for a few weeks, sorry Michael.” He could almost hear Michael’s puppy dog eyes blinking at him over the phone. He sighed, “I’ll meet you there at quarter ‘'til.”

“Cool.”

Brian hung up and tried to figure out what the hell he was doing. He moved towards the dining room table and pulled the file from his bag, trying to make the information they had so far make sense. 

He was going over the results from the lab again when the loft door startled him. Justin smiled and held up a bag. “Bagels.”

“Thought you went home.”

Justin shook his head. “We’ve got work to do.”

“No shit. This makes no sense.”

Justin sat down next to Brian, pushing the bag towards him and taking a large bite out of his own bagel. He slid the file out from under Brian’s fingers. “Eat. I think I have an idea.”

Brian nodded and watched as Justin’s brow furrowed while he studied the reports. He was flipping through the pages when his entire body stilled. He was mid chew, but he stopped. He swallowed hard and glared. Brian looked at him and then down at the paper he was reading. He stood up.

“What the fuck is this?”

“What?”

“Don’t bullshit me. Why do you have this?”

“Building a team.”

“Bullshit.”

“Curious.”

“Jealous?”

“Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Then why do you have Billy’s personnel file? How’d you even get it?”

Brian smirked, “I have my ways.”

“What’d you do, hack into the system? You have a friend you schmooze into getting it for you?”

Brian shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. He can’t help us.”

Justin pushed the file away from him. “No. He can’t.”

“So what’s up with the two of you?”

“Up?”

 

Brian watched Justin’s attention turn fully towards his bagel. He took another large bite and Brian knew he wasn’t hungry. He was avoiding answering the question. “He a closet case?”

“Don’t think so.” Justin still didn’t quite meet Brian’s eye when he replied.

“So he’s….”

“A guy I worked with. Now he’s here, so am I. Doesn’t mean we have to be friends.”

“Wasn’t thinking of inviting him to a dinner party.”

Justin was about to say something when his phone rang.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin’s POV

This is getting out of hand. He’s checking on my ex-coworkers? What the fuck? I’m about to call him on it when my phone rings. It’s Morrison. He wants to meet, hang out; he has something he wants to tell me. I agree. Truthfully, getting the fuck out of this loft seems a good idea right now.

I start to leave and Brian looks upset. Fuck. He’s overbearing, he’s controlling, but I’m not sure he can help it. I move towards him. He’s wearing sweatpants, no shirt. I put my hand on his chest. “You have to stop worrying about me.”

He nods. He’s sucking on his lower lip. I want to do that. I lean in and lick along his upper lip. He exhales into my mouth and I smile. “I’m a big boy. I can take care of myself.”

His mouth is on mine. He’s nodding, I think. I’m going to keep thinking that. I don’t want to think about him disagreeing with that statement. I’m backing him towards the chaise lounge. He’s not resisting. “I have to meet with Morrison in a little bit. 

He looks up. He has questions. I pull on the drawstring and his pants fall to the floor. He steps out of them and his cock is hard, perfect, standing at attention and leaking against his stomach. I want to taste that. I push him a little bit further, he falls back against the chair and I straddle him, moving down 'til I’m hovering over his shins and my mouth is circling the head of his cock. I lick lightly and he moans. I look up and he’s perfect. His arms over his head, his eyes closed, his face, the lines and planes, so beautiful. I take him into the back of my throat and his hand moves down to my hair. 

His hand is on my shoulder, and he’s moving his body, trying to dislodge me. I look up and he’s watching me. “I want to be inside you.”

I almost come when he says that. His voice is thick, deep, and his tone is commanding but there’s a hesitance there. I move quickly, he hands me a condom, I roll it on him and lower myself onto him. His hands span my waist and then I’m riding him. He’s watching me again, his eyes don’t close. I can tell it’s an effort for him to keep them open but he does. His fingers are spanning my thighs, pushing my legs apart further, while I move. I tighten around him and he groans, biting his lip again. What is it with this guy? It’s like if I find out he’s enjoying himself I win. He’s way too competitive.

So am I. I’m determined to win. I twist my body and move my mouth to one of his nipples, biting and pulling while I’m riding his cock. His hand is in my hair again. I’d think that was just him too but I know it’s not. Every guy I fuck wants to run his fingers through my hair. Lord save me from gay men with Meg Ryan fetishes. 

He’s close. His breathing is faster. his body is sweaty. I move to his other nipple and he groans. I smile but hide it by biting it again. He’s calling my name now. “Justin” in that deep tone that cracks a little when I squeeze his cock inside me. I’m rocking on him now. I’m sucking his tongue into my mouth. He’s nibbling my lower lip, his tongue playing between my lip and teeth, his breath hot and ragged. 

His arms are around me and he sits up, holding me to him and moving inside me. I’m about to come, and he knows it. His head is in the crook of my neck, I’m bouncing on his lap, my toes against the hardwood floor, he grunts and comes. So do I. My body tenses and I feel my orgasm build. Before I can even move my hand to my cock to speed it along I come, hard. He’s lying back now, looking for a cigarette. I can feel him softening inside me and I’m not quite ready to let him go yet. A few minutes later I do. Both of us wet and sticky.

I shower. He doesn’t join me. When I’m dressed again he smirks. “Soon you’ll be keeping clothes here.”

I flip him off. No, I won’t. I pull on my khakis and shirt. I’m trying to find my other shoe. He hands it to me. I nod. He wants to know where I’m going. I guess, since it’s part of the case, I can’t be too mad. I am anyway.

“Morrison called, he wants to meet with me.”

“For what?”

“I’ll find out when I meet him.”

“Where?”

“Some pizza place near Babylon. Vinny’s I think.”

“That place is a front.”

“Good.”

“It’s…”

“Say dangerous, see what happens.”

“I was going to say it was a health hazard.”

“No you weren’t but I’ll let it go.”

“I’m going in. I’ve got to check some reports and talk to Horvath.”

“Good. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He glares and I want to scream, but somehow, my job as a cop, got me a gig as a go-go boy, and a partner who doubles as a babysitter. I take a deep breath. “Tonight, after I get off work.”

He nods and I leave and I’m not sure I believe his reasons for going in, but I’m not sure I have the time or energy to think about it.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Brian showered once Justin left and then called Horvath to tell him to hang around. He wouldn’t be there 'til after five. Horvath told him to just come to Debbie's for dinner; they’d talk there. Brian had no way to get out of it so he agreed but he had really wanted to check into Morrison a little further, and this Billy guy, and… he lit another cigarette and headed towards his jeep. Vinny’s, the place was notorious for selling a lot more than pizza and cheese steaks. He smiled and wondered if the new little rookie would be the one to take that place down. Other cops had tried. And failed.

He got to Debbie’s somewhere after five. Debbie greeted him warmly. Michael was there too and Brian was a little aggravated. He really needed to get some information from Carl and it wasn’t anything he wanted to discuss in front of Michael. He’d find out later. They ate, and ate, and when he was sure there was no food left, Debbie brought out dessert and Brian tried to politely decline. Experience told him it was a useless endeavor. He tried anyway.

Carl started asking him questions about their progress in the case, and as they talked he became more concerned with their lack of progress. Carl didn’t seem worried but then Carl hadn’t seen Justin dancing at Babylon. Carl didn’t fully know what had gone on at The Sap's party, hell, neither did he… he tried not to focus to much on the fact that he was pretty sure that Justin didn’t really know either. Carl hadn’t been there this morning when Justin had gotten his own stalker. Debbie had.

“Carl, you’ve gotta get that kid outta there.”

“Debbie, he’s a police officer, not a kid. I’m sure he can take care of himself.”

“You didn’t see the guy following him this morning.”

“What guy?” Carl looked to Brian, then back to Debbie.

Debbie retold the events of the diner, but seemed to be addressing them to Brian, as if he hadn’t been there. “So the guy followed him out of the diner.” She finished.

Brian nodded. “And then he came back to the loft, where he’s perfectly safe.”

There were snorts of disbelief all around and Brian tried to find a really pressing reason to leave and meet Michael later. He couldn’t. 

“Let’s go to Woody’s.”

“Or Babylon.”

Brian shook his head. “Justin’s working.”

“So?”

“So I’m trying NOT to blow his cover.”

“And your being at Babylon would make people think there’s something abnormal about the evening?”

“Fine, I have to go home and change first. Meet you there?”

Michael shook his head. “I know you. I’ll go with.”

Brian was no more clear on what direction the case was heading than he had been before dinner. Michael was saying goodbye to his mother when Carl pulled him aside. “The kid’s okay?”

“Thought he wasn’t a kid?”

Carl glared and Brian nodded. “He’s holding his own. Stalker wasn’t much of an issue. Did you know some other rookie from Pitcairn’s working in our precinct?”

“Yeah, Billy, his dad was Pittsburgh PD.”

“So?”

“He’s a good kid.”

“He’s…”

Carl shook his head. “Let’s keep pretending you don’t know why Justin left Pitcairn. Otherwise I have to write you up for reading confidential personnel files.”

“Keep Billy away from Justin.”

“I think Justin can keep him away if he needs to.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, but you shouldn’t know what you mean.”

“Carl.”

“I’ll take care of it. Get the kid out of Babylon soon.”

Brian smirked. “Sick of hearing the boss bitch?”

“Her kids aren’t dying. She’s happy about that. Now she’s got a bug up her ass about Taylor.”

“Yeah, he brings out the maternal instinct in some.”

“And you two are just friends.”

“Carl, you know me better than that. Would I fuck my partner?”

“Probably.”

Brian was about to say something when Michael, coat in hand, joined them. “Ready?”

Brian nodded and headed the jeep back to his loft. It was early. He’d change. They’d go to Woody’s then the movie. If he timed it right they could avoid Babylon completely.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin slid into the booth where Morrison was already working on a beer. He poured himself one from the pitcher and shook his head at the offer of a cigarette. “Hey.”

“Hey, glad you could make it.”

Justin shrugged. “Nothing else to do.”

“You hungry?”

“I could eat.”

They ordered a pizza and Morrison kept up both sides of the conversation. Justin listened as Morrison told stories, asked questions and then answered them. A raised eyebrow, interested expression and occasional, “right” was all that was required of him. It was actually almost relaxing except that he had a feeling Morrison was working towards asking him something. He nodded again and continued to wait.

The pizza arrived. They both started eating and then Morrison changed his tone. “I know you need money.”

“I’m doing okay but yeah, everything’s expensive these days.”

“I think I can help.”

“Cool.”

“I know you worked Gary's party.”

“Yeah. But…”

Morrison shook his head. “I get it, you’re not really into that.”

“Not really.”

“That’s cool. Whatever. This is different.”

“Okay.”

“Nothing too illegal.”

“ _Too_ illegal?”

“I just need… can I trust you?”

“You already know you can trust me or you wouldn’t be talking to me.”

“Right, right. Listen, I just need a runner.”

“For what exactly?”

“Just… not dealing, I just need someone who can take an occasional request.”

“For what?”

“What do you think?”

“I think you’re dealing E and not cutting Gary in on it.”

“E, K, GHB and Crystal, all big sellers. All big money makers.”

“So how’s it work?”

“They tell you. You take the money and let me know. Then I make sure they get what they need.”

“And when Gary finds out?”

“Gary's up to his ass in bullshit with his suppliers. He won’t notice.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, he’s not paying attention. He came up seriously short last month and there are some very pissed off men breathing down his neck. He’s not looking in our direction.”

Justin leaned back and pretended to think about it. He nodded. “Yeah. Okay. So they come to me, they give me the money, how do I get it to you?”

“I’ll pick it up occasionally. Thing is when they come to me, they’re gonna have to be cleared by you.”

“Cleared.”

“I need some signal that they did actually pay you, and you know, what they paid you for.”

“This is getting complicated.”

“Don’t play stupid Taylor. I’m asking you because you’re not. Last kid I had working for me fucked it all up.”

“So how do I signal them?”

Morrison explained it to him and Justin thought about some way to keep Brian from Babylon 'til this was over. This was going to be an issue. He’d worry about that later. “So tonight?”

“Yeah, I need someone to do this for me. Trust me, you’ll make more than you make in tips.”

“I do okay.”

Morrison nodded and they finished their beers and went to work. 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Brian’s plan worked well until eleven when Michael insisted they check out “boy wonder” as he’d dubbed Justin. Brian tried to get him to play a game of pool but in the end, they were leaning against the bar at Babylon and Brian was trying not to stare at Justin in a blue satin Speedo and some weird wrist cuffs. He tried very hard not to watch Justin touch several of the guys who were tipping him. 

Justin didn’t usually touch them back. He wondered if Gary had slipped him something or if Justin was simply more comfortable with the job. 

“He’s all over that guy.”

Brian nodded. “Probably searching him for contraband.”

Michael laughed and Brian dragged him onto the dance floor. He tried to catch Justin’s eye but Justin resolutely refused to meet his gaze.

Less than an hour later Brian was dragging Michael to the theatre.

Two hours later he dropped Michael off and headed back to the loft for his now ritual pacing and smoking while he waited to see what kind of trouble Justin was planning on denying he was in.

He had almost convinced himself that Justin would be fine when the door opened and Justin rushed through, breathless and looking harried. “Fuck.”

“Something new?”

Justin closed the door behind him. “Annoying man, from this morning. He’s back.”

“Did he follow you here?”

“No, he was outside Babylon. I got rid of him.”

“How?”

“I kneed him in the balls.”

“You fight dirty.”

“He touched me.”

Brian tried to stay glib. “Bad touch?”

“Fuck off. He’s creepy. If he shows up again I’m getting a restraining order.” Justin took the cigarette out of Brian’s hand and inhaled deeply. Brian tried to find words. He was torn. He wanted to take off and kill stalker boy. He wanted to ask Justin why he had suddenly taken up smoking. He wanted to know why he’d been touching guys all night and yet this guy touching him had his hand shaking a little as he handed the cigarette back. 

He decided to simply get them each a beer, and maybe a scotch. He could always kill stalker boy later.

They were sitting on the sofa. Justin with a glass of gin, Brian with two fingers of beam. “Okay, so…”

“Morrison's dealing.”

“Really?”

“I’m running for him. That’s why I was touching those guys.”

“You’re what?”

Justin explained it, and Brian did his best not to throttle Justin. 

“You’re getting involved in a _second_ drug trafficking operation?”

“Well The Sap's being dealt with externally. He still doesn’t know I’m a cop, so I’m hoping he either notices what I’m doing… and thus shares more information that he planned, because there’s no way that what he’s telling the idiot twins is accurate. No fucking way. And if not, we can just take down Morrison too. He’s working for the guy who owns Vinny’s, it might be big.”

“You planning on cleaning up Liberty Avenue single-handedly?”

“I was thinking you’d help.”

“Maybe. But…” Brian didn’t get a chance to answer. His phone rang.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Justin’s POV

Whatever news he just got, it’s not good. I lean back against the sofa and try to calm my nerves. I’m pissed off. I let that guy get to me. I knew Brian was pissed about something, and a lot of the customers I had to touch today wanted to take things further. A couple might have even been a good tie but with the other cops working the inside, there’s no way I was going to do that. 

So I was in a hurry to get the fuck out of there. My guard was down. Mistake. Annoying guy thought this would be his opportunity. I told him to fuck off. Not sure what part of that he didn’t get. I moved away. He tried to grab my arm. I turned around to tell him to fuck off again and he was on me. Hands on both my wrists. Knee between my legs that’s when I kicked him. It was instinct. Panic. I thought I was over panic like that. Maybe Pittsburgh was a bad idea. 

I look up, Brian’s off the phone and he’s pacing. Right… focus. There’s an entire world that doesn’t revolve around me.

“What’s wrong?”

“More people died.”

“Oh shit. Is it possible that it’s still residual shit?”

“They don’t think so. There were three at pistol, one at Popperz, two at Babylon. Tonight they all decided to take the last or their stash?”

“Seems unlikely.”

“Carl agrees. And loved getting called at three in the morning.”

“I’m sure.”

“Would you stop fucking agreeing with me.”

“You want to argue? For a guy who’s got serious control issues, you seem to thrive on crisis.”

“I’m best under pressure.”

“Good to know. So, what now?”

“Nothing we can do 'til we get the lab reports from the new victims.”

“So I’ll…”

I’m walking to the door and I am determined that I’m going to sleep, at home, in my bed.

He wraps his fingers around my wrist and pulls me to him. I’m still shaken from annoying stalker man, and this doesn’t help. He’s big on control and I know he’s been holding back, probably because of that minor hissy I threw when he covered my mouth. Now he’s more focused on getting me into bed than anything else. His eyes are dark and he’s angry and that scares me.

Fuck. He sees it. Shit, now I have to get out of here.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*

Brian’s POV

So he’s touching customers to let that Morrison kid know what they paid for. Okay, for a moment I’m going to pretend that’s not the most fucked thing he’s done all week. It probably isn’t. He’s still shaking from whatever happened with his infatuated admirer. He’s holding himself differently. He usually sprawls on the sofa after working, when he’s too tired to fully answer my questions and hold himself upright. Today, he’s ramrod stiff, and not at all in a good way.

After the phone call he’s even more upset, and, surprise, his goal is to leave. He does that, I’ve noticed. He tries to retreat. I get it. I do. I just don’t want him to leave until I know what the fuck is going on. I’m not thinking. I pull him to me. Shit. He’s scared. 

Pictures flash. The ones in his personnel file. The bruises. I let him go. He takes a step back, his breathing shallow. His hands shaking as he pushes against my chest. I let him. I take another step away from him.

“You have got to cut shit like that out. I am not some little rag doll who’s gonna melt into your arms every time you yank me there.”

I don’t know how to respond to that. I’ve never wanted to hold anyone the way I want to hold him. That thought alone makes me take another step backwards. He thinks I’m moving because he’s yelling. He moves forward, towards me. I want to take another step away from his angry glare and his tangible fear. I force myself to stand still, to let him get as close as he wants. I don’t move.

He’s almost touching me now. He looks up and I look down. Our eyes meet. He pulls my head down and kisses me. Then he turns and walks away. Fuck. I don’t want him to leave. He tastes too good.

“Justin.”

He turns, “what?”

 

“You’re little stalker…”

“He’s just a guy who wants to fuck me. No real threat.”

“Did he follow you?”

“No. I took off while he was still holding his balls and laying on the gravel.”

“You sure?”

“You want me to stay.”

It’s not a question. I nod. He shakes his head. “You know, someday, I’m going to say no to you.”

I nod again. I’m really not looking forward to that day.

He pulls his shirt over his head and moves towards the bedroom. “I’m taking a shower.”

I nod again.

“Join me.”

I am so fucked. I join him.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Once they were out of the shower Brian began to rub the towel over Justin’s hair. He swatted Brian’s hands away. “I can dry myself.”

He then stood on his toes and dried Brian’s hair. Brian almost protested but then the towel dropped behind him and Justin’s still damp, warm body was pressed against his and he didn’t really give a fuck how his hair got dry, or even _if_ it did. Justin pushed him back towards the bed and they fell together. Brian stretching his body over Justin’s covering every inch of his skin with his own. They continued an unbroken kiss for several minutes. Their hands moving, stroking each other’s cocks and then moving away. Brian kneading Justin’s ass, Justin wrapping his legs around Brian’s waist and thrusting his own cock against Brian’s. 

They continued kissing and petting for a long time. Brian realized he hadn’t spent this much time on foreplay since he was in high school. He pushed thoughts about how much this didn’t feel like foreplay to the back of his mind.

Justin was having similar thoughts. Sex was fun, but this wasn’t sex. This was something else, something more. They were enjoying the feelings, the feel of one another. The close contact, the… _intimacy_ and Justin almost laughed at that, but then Brian’s hands were running down his torso, moving back up to his nipples, rolling and tweaking them, tugging his nipple ring, making his back bow and his mouth open. He wanted Brian inside him but he didn’t want this to end. This feeling of being the only two people in the world with nowhere to go and nothing to do other than touch.

They both pulled back at times, so close to coming it was embarrassing. Finally Justin couldn’t take it anymore. He rolled over and pulled himself up to his knees. Spreading his legs, using every motion to let Brian know what he wanted.

Brian had other plans. His fingers stroked the inside of Justin’s thighs, feather light touches that moved to his balls. He pressed the spot behind them and then ghosted his fingers over the head of Justin's cock, his thumb sliding the precum over the head. His mouth followed his fingers. Stroking and licking, suckling and then finally his tongue was at Justin’s hole. 

Justin pushed his ass back into Brian’s face. Brian pressed his tongue inside him and Justin let out a low moan, pushing further back, clenching around Brian's tongue, trying to hold the slippery appendage inside him. He gasped in frustration when Brian went back to simply licking and stroking the outside of his hole. Justin felt himself wet with Brian’s saliva and wanted something of the man inside him, but as he seemed in no hurry to oblige Justin moved his own fingers back towards his ass.

Brian’s hands covered his own as he pushed one, then a second finger inside him. He grunted as he pushed them in almost too quickly. Justin grunted even louder when Brian’s fingers joined his, sliding into him, curling with his. Their fingers intertwined inside him. He felt full and when he stroked his own prostate, and Brian’s fingers followed immediately afterwards he bucked into Brian’s hands. One resting on his ass the other deep inside him. 

“Brian, fuck me. Please.”

Brian didn’t move his hands away. He slowly let his free hand curl around Justin’s waist until he was grasping his cock. Squeezing and releasing, but not stroking him off. Justin moved back, fucking himself on his own fingers and Brian's. Trying to thrust his cock into Brian’s hand. And when Brian mercilessly stroked his prostate moving Justin’s fingers with his own so that each movement was doubled, all sensations were intensified, Justin came.

Brian pulled out just as the warm flood filled his hand. He put on a condom and plunged deep into Justin, feeling the boy’s body convulse around him. Hearing him yell his name, “fuck Brian, oh my god. Yes.”

Hearing him hiss on the last word. He moved slowly, each time the head of his cock dragged over Justin’s prostate, Justin quivered and moaned. And when Brian came, Justin’s body tensed and released as if he’d had a second orgasm. 

Brian pulled out and rolled onto his back. Justin moved over top of him, fitting his hips between Brian’s thighs and kissed him. He nibbled on his tongue and ran his hands through Brian’s hair and a few moments later Brian kissed him back. Their hands once again finding and familiarizing themselves with each other’s bodies. They kissed and petted and eventually Justin’s mouth moved lower, to Brian’s nipples and then even lower to his cock, swallowing around him and humming as he took Brian over the brink.

Eventually, when they were too tired to do anything more than press their naked bodies against each other they fell asleep.

 

 

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Seven  


* * *

 

 

Justin woke up to the not uncomfortable feel of Brian’s arm across his back. He moaned and rolled over. Brian didn’t seem to move except to curl his hand more firmly around Justin’s waist. Justin closed his eyes and tried to ignore the thoughts swirling in his head that were getting louder by the minute. He slowly opened one eye and watched Brian sleep. He knew, _knew_ that this was not going to end well and yet he kept coming back here, kept having sex with this man. 

He wanted to sit up, to get dressed, to leave, but he’d done that, a lot, and that was probably why they were both still circling each other nervously and then pouncing one each other as if neither of them had gotten laid in months. He let the thoughts swirl until they were a cacophony of illogic and common sense so bound together he’d never be able to pull them apart. Then he gave up and closed his eyes. He needed more sleep before he dealt with any of this.

Two hours later he opened his eyes again. The urge to leave was still there. Brian was still asleep. Justin knew he’d been giving in to his urges more than usual. He decided to just work the case with Brian today and see where that got him. 

Justin was finishing making coffee, wearing a pair of Brian’s sweatpants that were too long in the leg, and no shirt. He handed Brian a cup as he staggered over to the kitchen counter. He poured a shitload of sugar into the mug and didn’t seem to want to talk. 

Justin took the file from the table and moved it, himself and his coffee to the chair in the living room to see if he could make sense of anything. A few minutes later, Brian, still bedheaded but slightly more awake picked up a few of the pages Justin had left on the coffee table. He stared at them and Justin wondered if Brian could even focus yet. Finally Brian spoke.

“We’re missing something.”

“You keep saying that.”

“I keep thinking we’re missing something.”

“Okay, let’s say we are. What are we missing?”

Brian flipped over one of the pages and grabbed a pen. He started to diagram what they knew. Justin watched fascinated and eventually pulled the pen and paper from Brian’s hand. “Here, let me.”

He drew carefully, and Brian raised an eyebrow. Justin shrugged. “I’ve always been good at drawing.”

He started with a quick sketch of The Sap at the top, connecting lines as he added the bartenders. “The Sap is supplying the E to your informants?”

Brian nodded and Justin added them to the growing group. He pulled another sheet of paper and overlapped it with the one he was using. He started at the top with a line sketch of Vinny’s pizza. “I think the rest of the shit is coming from whomever is running the operation at Vinny’s.”

Brian nodded. Justin filled in a few more boxes. “And Morrison works at Vinny’s and for The Sap.”

They looked at what they had. “Fuck.”

Justin nodded.

“Stay the hell away from Morrison.”

Justin laughed. “I’m trying to catch him. How do I do that while I stay away from him?”

“He’s…”

“He’s selling drugs for two major players or he’s selling drugs for one and not cutting the other in.”

“Or he _is_ the major player. We don’t know who’s controlling Vinny’s operations.”

“It might be Morrison.”

“That place has been around too long for it to be Morrison. Kid can’t be older than you.”

“Maybe it’s a family business.”

“You think he took over for someone?”

Justin bit the end of Brian’s pen. “I’m not sure what I think.”

“But you think The Sap and Vinny’s are connected.”

“I think if they’re not, Morrison is playing a dangerous game.”

Brian stood up. “I need a shower, I stink.”

“I’ll join you.”

Justin knew Brian was smiling although he could only see his back as he followed him to the bathroom.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian’s POV

Fucking Morrison. I have to get _that_ kid out of my head. Justin’s body is against mine. His ass is grinding against my cock. I pull away; he turns around and arches an eyebrow at me. I kiss him. His mouth is hot and wet, so is his body, the water sliding between us. I wash his hair and my own, I want to fuck him, but not here. In the bed, spread out underneath me. I want a long slow….

Fuck it. I turn him around and his fingers splay against the glass. His legs spread. I reach for a condom and I’m inside him. He’s tightening around me, moaning my name and I kiss his shoulder. I wrap my hand around his cock and jerk him off quickly. I’m not sure how long I can hold off. He’s so tight. We both come. My arm moves around his waist and his body leans back against me. I maneuver us back directly under the stream of water and as we rinse off I realize I still want to fuck him on the bed, his body spread beneath mine.

We’re out of the shower. He’s drying himself off. I’m not the jealous type but I’m feeling envious of that towel as he runs it over his body. He shakes his head at me and splatters me with water. I laugh… I shouldn’t. That’s not funny. He’s kissing me again. His hands running down my back and as I walk backwards he walks with me. When I’m laying on the bed his body is stretched over mine and I realize that once again, he’s exactly where I want to be. What the fuck? I wrap my arms around him and roll us both over. I wait a moment. He’s hard to read sometimes. This could go either way. He doesn’t bitch, he doesn’t try to roll us back. He moves further onto the bed and now my face is against his belly. I kiss him there, and feel his stomach muscles flutter. I smile and move lower, kissing his cock. He grunts and then sighs. I look up and he’s got a soft smile on his face. I like that. I lick him again and push gently on his thighs. He spreads them, and I’m kissing lightly against the smooth pale skin. 

He moves his hips, trying to get his cock closer to my mouth. I ignore his efforts, my hands sliding under his ass, my mouth tasting every clean soft warm inch of him. I move up a little, kissing his hipbone. I lick at the small almost invisible line of a scar. I keep meaning to ask him about that. I look up at him again, my tongue tracing ragged line. He looks down and sees where my tongue is. Fuck, his expression changes and he’s sitting up now. I move higher but he’s pulling away. Something inside me feels cold, and tight and I’m kneeling between his knees and trying to kiss his mouth but he turns his head. I sigh and sit next to him. Apparently no one’s getting laid right now.

“You have to cut that shit out.”

I wonder if I should pretend I don’t know what he’s talking about, and then realize I _don’t_ know what he’s talking about. 

“What are you talking about?”

“You. You find every imperfection and focus on it.”

I’m lost. “Huh?” I know, brilliant.

“You don’t have to kiss it better. I’m used to it.”

“I was just…”

“What?”

I have no fucking clue. I shrug and light a cigarette.

“I’m interested, Brian. What was it you thought you were doing?”

“I was going to blow you, then fuck you. I’m not sure what _you_ thought I was doing but I thought I was being pretty clear.”

“But…”

“So you have a scar? Who doesn’t?”

“But…”

“How’d you get it?” He pulls further away.

“You know how.”

I really don’t. “I really don’t.”

“I got it in Pitcairn.”

Images flash. The pictures in his personnel file. A cut, about that size. I didn’t realize it was on his hip, the camera was too close to get context. I feel sick. His expression changes, he looks… fuck, he looks scared and he’s moving further away. From me, or the memory? 

“What happened in Pitcairn?”

He runs his hand through his hair. “Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

“I know you got banged up. I know you filed charges of assault. I don’t know what happened.”

“I didn’t file any charges.”

“But…”

“I know, charges were filed. I didn’t file them.”

“Who?” I’m lost.

He shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter. A little harmless hazing and suddenly everything was out of control.”

I want to yell but I’m not sure at whom. “Harmless hazing?”

 

“New guy in the station…”

“So they beat the shit out of you?”

Something like that. He moves to get up and I touch his shoulder. I want to wrap my fingers around his arm, I think that might be the worst thing I can do right now. “Tell me.”

“I’ve told this story a hundred times.”

“Let’s make it a hundred and one.”

“You don’t want to know.”

“I asked didn’t I?”

He’s shaking. I reach out to touch him and he pulls away. I don’t. I’m still touching him and his body is tense and rigid, and I try to move closer to him. I do it slowly and he lets me. My arms are around him. He moves so he’s sitting between my legs, leaning back against me. I can’t see his face. I want to, but maybe this is easier for him if I can’t.

“They found out I was gay.”

“How?”

He shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter. They did. I wasn’t exactly in the closet. Not out either though.”

“But they found out.”

He nods against my chest. “Fucking assholes.”

“Didn’t take kindly to the idea?”

“I guess not. Dealt with the standards. Faggot jokes. Single entendres. Ugly assholes thinking I care if I see them in the shower.”

I nod. I remember. His hands are balled into fists and resting on his thighs. I run my hand down his arm and cover his hand with my own. I push my fingers between his. He lets me. His hand laying on my leg now, my fingers alternating with his. “They hurt you.”

It’s almost a whisper and I feel him nod. “They got together, a bunch of them, tied me up. Duct tape on my mouth. I’m not sure what their plan was. I think they were just trying to scare me. It worked. Kyle, another guy on the force, he walked in and stopped it. That’s when we started seeing each other. He pressed charges, I didn’t.”

“And the guys involved?”

“Slap on the wrist, took a diversity training and acceptance course. Most of them still work there.”

“Except Billy.”

“Except Billy.”

“And Kyle?”

 

“We were together for about six months. Lived together for three of them. He was the label whore.”

I nod. I’d figured.

“Then we broke up and I moved to Pittsburgh.”

“You still talk to him?”

“No, when it’s over, it’s over. Staying friends? When has that _ever_ worked?”

“That’s why they assigned you here. With me, and Horvath.”

“Probably. They told me that Horvath was infamous for being okay with alternative lifestyles.” The tone in his voice makes it clear what he thinks of the phrase.

“Can’t be married to Debbie and not be.”

“She’s…”

“One of a kind.”

“Yeah I guess. Plus you.”

“Me?”

 

“You’re gay.”

I laugh. “Yes.”

“And out.”

“Yes.”

“And you don’t, apparently, have issues with the other detectives.”

“I have issues but not because of who I fuck.”

“Well, they’re all idiots.”

“Yes, that’s the issue I have. But…”

“Yeah, I know, you’re not a role model. He’ll you’d be a crappy role model.”

“Good thing you don’t need one.”

“I think the Pittsburgh PD was trying to avoid getting sued like Pitcairn did.”

“You sued Pitcairn PD?”

“No, but Kyle did.”

“How the fuck did Kyle manage that?”

“Hostile work environment. Fear for his own safety due to homophobic hate crimes.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, he got a chunk of change.”

“And didn’t give you a dime?”

“I didn’t want a dime. For what? I got hazed and he made me the most hated cop on the force.”

“Why didn’t they hate him?”

“Because people are idiots.”

“They are.”

“Have you…”

“What?”

 

“Talked to someone, about this?”

“I had to see a shrink for evaluation, but she cleared me after three sessions.”

“And you’re so obviously over it.”

“For the most part.”

“Unless I touch you wrong.”

“It’s not just you. It’s anyone.”

“Well that makes it better.”

“Brian.”

“Yes?”

 

“I’m fine.”

“Okay.”

He twists in my arms 'til he’s on his knees facing me. His mouth is on mine and then he’s breathing into my ear. “Now, where were we?”

Something about this feels wrong. I’m aware he’s trying to prove just how okay he is. He’s also naked and his knee is moving gently against my cock, and I push him backwards until I’m covering his body, but I hold myself up on my arms. I don’t want him to feel trapped. “I think I was about to suck your cock.”

He rolls over under me. “Just fuck me.”

He pushes up on his knees, spreads them, and angles towards my cock. Find me a gay man who can resist the soft feel of his skin against his thighs, the heat of his ass against his hard cock and I’ll find you a man who’s _not_ gay.

I put the condom on quickly and as I slide into him I feel him tense against me. I move even more slowly and curse his sense of independence. I want to see his face. I’m not sure he’s fine. I also have a feeling if I stopped now he’d never forgive me. I don’t want to stop, now, or ever. I fuck him, gently, until he starts demanding it harder and faster and my arm drapes over his shoulder. I’m pulling on his nipple ring. He’s stroking his own cock and meeting me thrust for thrust as I pound into him.

We’re both sweaty when we come. He collapses under me and I fall on top of him. I roll off and can’t help running my fingers through his hair while he turns to look at me, neither of us having caught our breath yet. 

“That was amazing.”

I smile and tuck his hair behind his ear. “It was alright.”

He rolls on top of me and tickles me until I admit it was pretty fucking great. And then he’s lying on top of me fully, and we kiss again. I feel how narrow his waist is. I picture them tying him up. The panic in his eyes. Duct tape on his mouth so he can’t even scream. I wonder if they were trying to scare him, or worse. I’m not going to ask him now. I consider tracking down Kyle but then the image of Justin finding out about that stops the thought immediately. If I want to know I’m going to have to ask him.

Not now. Not today. 

Eventually he pulls away from me. I’m hard again, so is he. He moves until his knees are on the pillow, his cock angled temptingly towards my lips. He lowers himself towards me and takes me into his own mouth at the same time and I’m sucking him off while he’s doing something indescribably perfect to my cock. His hands are stroking my thighs while his hips are pumping into me. When he comes I swallow around him and he sucks hard on my shaft, humming. I come too.

He takes a moment to lick me and then pulls off. “I have to meet Morrison.”

“Be careful.”

He rolls his eyes and changes into a pair of jeans that accentuate his, quite honestly, perfect ass. He’s wearing that orange t-shirt again. I’m still lying in bed. I know I need to get up, go into the station, but he’s almost worn me out. He leans over to kiss me before he leaves. “Don’t fall back asleep. You need to go in and run a check on Morrison.” I know this and I’m about to tell him that when he wiggles his ass at me and leaves.

I smoke two cigarettes before I shower again and head towards the station.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*

Brian was doing a general background check on Morrison. His full given name was Jeffery Morrison Manicini. His uncle was Vincent Morrison Manicini, the owner of Vinny’s. Well, the CEO of Vincent’s food Purveyance, Inc. So Morrison was working for Vinny’s. For _Vinny_. What the fuck was he doing dancing for The Sap? Brian jotted the question down on his growing list of questions that were not being satisfactorily answered by his current inquiry. The kid had no priors and was not, as far as Brian could tell, under investigation. Well, he was now, but not officially. Brian didn’t trust anyone at the moment. Putting Morrison's name on any official documentation was a bad idea.

He jotted a few more notes, printed out a few more reports and then researched what Justin had told him about Pitcairn. The information was sketchy at best. These were the types of reports and settlements that were completed with a minimum of paperwork and a maximum of confidentiality clauses. He was on his way out when he ran into Horvath.

Carl walked into his office, motioning whith his coffee cup for Brian to follow. Brian did and Horvath shut the door behind him.

“More deaths.”

Brian nodded.

“So The Sap wasn’t the guy.”

Brian nodded again.

“And Taylor’s still working at Babylon.”

“The sky’s blue. Cars go fast. Anything else captain obvious?”

“Don’t fuck with me Kinney. The kid’s not getting jack shit accomplished in there. Get him out.”

“You’re his superior officer. You get him out.”

Carl sighed. “Debbie's upset.”

“You’re not?”

“You know I am. And they’re still breathing down my neck.”

“We’ve got a lead.”

“Who?”

“I can’t say.”

“Bullshit.”

“It’s too risky.”

“For who?”

“For Justin. He’s working on it though.”

“Brian…”

“Trust me.”

“I’m trusting you. You want me to tell Debbie to trust you? Three of the new deaths were ‘her boys’.”

“Fuck.”

“No shit.”

“We’re closing in.”

“And The Sap should give us everything we need by next week.”

“Good, by then, hopefully, I’ll have Justin out of there.”

“If he cracks this, he won’t have to walk a beat.”

“He’ll crack it.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Carl, give us the benefit of the doubt.”

Carl nodded and turned his attention to a stack of paperwork on his desk. “Oh and Brian.” Brian’s hand was on the door. He turned to face Horvath. “Careful with Morrison, I think he’s got an in with the department.” Brian nodded. “And if you go into personnel files again like that, I’ll have your ass.” Brian smiled. “You don’t want my ass.”

“Lucky for you.” 

Brian smirked and left. 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Justin’s POV

I hate this job…no, this detail. This is _not_ my job. I’m dancing, and the natives are getting restless. Thursday nights always suck. Not Friday, so they’re holding back, but gearing up. Someone’s whispering in my ear, telling me what he wants. Yeah, crystal and weed, I can get him that. I take his money and touch his shoulder. Then I run my hand down his chest and stop at his waistband. It looks like harmless flirtation. Morrison gets the signal. A couple minutes later the guy’s dancing with one of Morrison's boys, the trade is made and the deal is sealed. Another guy is whispering what he wants, and it’s not drugs. I shake my head but don’t stop smiling. He thinks I’m kidding. I want to stop smiling but Gary's yelled at me twice about that. Says he’s seen more seductive looks from loan sharks looking to break his kneecaps. So I smile.

Brian’s here. He just got here and he’s dancing with someone. He moves towards me and I want to shake him off but I can’t. Gary's watching. I can’t even stop smiling. He whispers in my ear. “We’ve got to get you out of here, soon.”

I really want to pull him closer, or push him away and I can’t do either. Fuck. I let him slide the twenty under my waistband and breathe into his ear. “No fucking way.”

He moves away but not before whispering “later” to me. Whatever. I really should go to my own place tonight. He knows too much about me. I can’t believe I told him about Pitcairn. The images flash and I close my eyes and dance. There’s a hand on my ass and I pull away but it’s just another customer. I grind my crotch into his face and he tells me what he wants. I touch him just right and Morison’s boy delivers. This is getting old fast.

On my break Gary pulls me into his office to tell me what a great job I’m doing. He wants to move me closer to the action. I still don’t want to dance on the bar, too close, and too many bartenders to observe my interactions. I can’t say no without Gary getting suspicious. I nod. He moves closer. He wants to blow me. I’m too tired to care, what’s one more guy touching me tonight? I close my eyes and let him and when he’s done I move to the bar. Morrison shoots me a look and I shrug. We’re getting nowhere with Gary, I’m really hoping I didn’t just lose my gig with Morrison.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian watched Justin dance. When Justin took a break Brian took a trip to the back room. He was leaning against the wall, his hands on the sides of a man’s face as he fucked his mouth. He came and moved out of the back room. he saw Justin, back from his break and dancing on the bar. He decided that Justin had apparently put in his time, (two weeks), and resolutely decided that after everything Justin had told him today, he would not even consider the possibility that he’d let The Sap blow him. Justin looked tired. Brian felt tired. He moved to the bar and ordered a shot of tequila. He downed it quickly and moved to tuck the change into Justin’s waistband. Justin moved towards him, crawling and took the money out of his hand with his teeth. Brian felt his cock twitch, and then was overcome by nausea. This kid should _not_ be doing that. Not today, not ever. He was a cop. Brian mumbled “by four” and saw Justin fight his own desire to refuse. He turned away to move towards another customer, his thumb tucked under his hand, four fingers on the bar. Brian went home.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin was wound up. Morrison had given him shit outside the club once they’d both changed. He’d told Morrison to fuck off. He was wired, and he wanted to fuck someone, and then go to sleep. He was really tired of the large number of controlling men in his life. 

He shouldered past Morrison to come face to face with annoying man. “Oh Jesus fuck, what do you want?’

The guy looked taken aback. “I was wondering…”

“No.”

“But you…”

“No.”

“Look, I just wanted to…”

“Fuck the fuck off. I can’t be more clear.” Justin pushed past him. He walked in long aggravated strides until he was behind Brian’s building. He walked up the steps and pulled open the door. Brian was standing at the kitchen counter with two beers. 

Justin took the beer and drained it quickly. He turned in a circle once, his face never losing its expression of aggravation. “Fine, see? Gotta go.”

“Justin.”

Justin turned to face him. “Yeah?”

“Where are you going?”

“To get laid.”

Brian raised an eyebrow. “That’s something you can’t do right here?”

“I’ve had a for shit day. I’m in the mood to fuck someone and you’re not the type to roll over. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

Justin was surprised by Brian’s response.

“What makes you think I won’t roll over?”

Justin turned. “History. Experience. I’m not functionally retarded.”

Brian seemed to be smirking. “You’re that sure?”

“From everything I’ve heard.”

“And everything you’ll ever hear.”

“So you don’t…”

“Not usually.”

Justin was stalking him now, challenging him. “But you will.”

Brian drained his beer. “Yeah.”

“Why?”

Brian shook his head. “Because geographically, it’s more convenient when you’re naked in my bed.”

“Doesn’t work for this one.”

“But it’ll still be true in the morning.”

“Not really in the mood to play head games.”

“Who says I’m playing.”

Justin was unbuttoning Brian’s shirt, not actually believing the man but once he’d gotten to Brian’s waistband he knew that Brian would have to, at this point, actually admit he didn’t want to do this for it to stop, and Brian would never admit that. The thought made him harder, made him feel powerful and also, oddly protective of the man standing in front of him, attempting to seem impervious. He wouldn’t say no at this point, even if he _wanted_ to. Justin’s movements slowed down. He pulled off his own shirt and jeans and laid back on the bed. Brian was watching him.

He crooked a finger and Brian moved closer. He pulled Brian on top of him and let out an oof as Brian’s body knocked the air out of his. They both laughed.

Justin touched Brian’s face. “You’re laughing.”

Brian nodded.

“In bed.”

Brian seemed to think about that and laughed again. “I guess I am.”

Justin smiled and Brian leaned down to kiss him.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

I’m watching him take of his clothes and realize I’ve lost control of my own mouth, and mind. I just gave him the go ahead to fuck me. Why? Because he looked harried, and hot, and the option was him, naked and in my ass or him not here at all, and that can’t be a good enough reason. 

He’s tugging on my arm a little and I fall on top of him. He laughs. I laugh. We’re laughing, in bed, together. I’m a little confused. He came in aggravated and demanding and sure of what he wanted and now he’s being tender and hesitant. What the fuck is up with that?

I lean in to kiss him, hard. I don’t want hesitant, the only reason I’d even consider letting him fuck me is that he’s pretty good at being in control. I may never admit that too him out loud, trust me, kid’s got ego enough for three twinks, he has proven that for the most part, yeah, he can walk it _and_ talk it.

He seems to hear what I’m not saying because he’s kissing me back, meeting my intensity. Have I talked about what he tastes like? This might be a good time because he’s a delicacy. When you look at him, you think bubblegum and honey and oranges or whatever stupid romantic twinkie little flavors pop into mind, but he tastes… like salt, and sweat, and man, and denim. His tongue is rough like cheap rum, wet like cold beer and hot like the first gulp of a good latte. His lips are full and soft and every time I kiss him I get hard because the thought of those lips around my cock, the image of them sliding up and down my shaft while his blonde hair tickles my thighs, that’s burned into my brain. His lips touch mine and I want to push him to his knees, or move down his body and suck _his_ cock, which is perfect and hard and currently pushing against my thigh. 

He pushes me back and looks into my eyes. Fuck, do I have to make it clear to him that this is still just fucking? He pulls a condom out of the drawer and the lube. He hands me the condom. “Put it on me.” 

I stroke his sheathed cock lightly with a palm full of lube and he smiles at me. “Ride me.”

I look at him like he might be insane. I’m twice his height, there’s… I’m about to say something and the look on his face changes to concern. _concern…over me_ what was it he said once… “I love it when you fuck me like I’m not some little china doll.” Yeah…fuck him. He thinks I’m so fucking delicate. I move, straddling his waist but he pulls me forward. “Not yet.” His fingers are slick and then they’re inside me and he’s right…not yet. He’s fucking me with his fingers. I open up for him, my eyes closed, lowering myself down onto his hand and him pushing one then two fingers inside me. I moan and bite my lip and he laughs again. I look down to yell at him but he’s not laughing at me… he’s just enjoying himself and really, how can I hold that against him?

I lean forward, one hand flat on the pillow on either side of his head. I dip my head and kiss him and he kisses me back, his fingers stroking my prostate, curling inside me. Then one of his hands is on my chest, pushing me backwards. His feet are planted on the mattress and I put one hand on his knee to steady myself. I hold his cock upright and press it against my hole. I don’t move yet; don’t let him in; just let him feel himself there.

He whimpers and I smile and lower myself the slightest bit. I grit my teeth as the wide head of his cock opens me up and I stay there, letting him stretch me. I feel it, and I let him feel it, want more. We both do. I move and he moans. I lower myself slowly, inch by inch until his hands are on my thighs, and I’m grinding my ass against his groin. I angle just right, feeling the electricity shoot through my body. I squeeze against him and realize I’m going to ache tomorrow and I don’t fucking care. His hands are squeezing my thighs now; he wants me to move, to ride him. He’s about to ask. I don’t give him the chance.

I raise myself up until I’m almost off of him completely and then slam down again. He grunts and I lean forward, pulling at his nipple ring while I move in a languid rhythm over his cock. He’s thrusting into me and I’m grinding back on him. He bites his lip and I shake my head. That’s my job. I lean forward, my chest pressed against his. His cock filling me and I push my tongue into his mouth. I pull back and nibble on his bottom lip. When I pull away completely his lips are bright red and his body is slick with sweat. He’s begging me to go faster and I reach back, using his knees for leverage as I speed things up. We’re both lost to all of it, the feel, the taste the scent. I feel him come, and see it. His body tenses. His stomach muscles ripple between my thighs, his face contorts and then softens in a look of abject bliss and my hand is on my cock. His joins mine and he’s stroking me, breathing ragged, heart racing. I come all over his chest and hand as well as my own.

He wraps his fingers around my wrist and sucks the come from my fingers, and his own. I swear I’m hard again, even while he’s softening inside me. His tongue swirling around both our fingers inside his mouth, wet and hot. His soft lips sucking on my finger like it’s my cock. He smiles up at me through his lashes and I realize that this kid may be fatal, and then realize that I can’t think of a better way to go. I collapse on top of him, and as I straighten my legs he falls out of me. I roll us over until he’s on top of me, and he moves down to lick the come off of my belly. I run my fingers through his hair and sigh. 

We still have a lot to figure out, but none of it matters right now. He crawls back up my body and we’re both sticky and should be sated, but we’re not. It’s a long time before we fall asleep, about a hundred kisses, two blowjobs and a rim job, but only approximately, it’s not like I was counting.


	8. Chapter 8

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Eight   


* * *

 

Four days later Justin was at his apartment.

“It’s… nice.”

“It’s fine. I’m hardly ever here.”

“Well, you’re working nights and…”

“I sleep at Brian’s a lot.”

“Why?”

Justin bit the side of his thumb. “Why?”

 

“You seem set up here. Why are you sleeping there?”

“Because I have to check in after work, so…”

“So you’re still sleeping with him?”

“Mom.”

“I’m just curious. It’s been, almost three weeks. I thought you’d be bored with him by now.”

Justin laughed. “He’s a lot of things, boring isn’t one of them.”

Jennifer nodded and Justin knew she wanted more information. She wasn’t going to get it. The truth was he didn’t _have_ more information. He had no fucking clue what was going on between himself and Brian. He watched her struggle to find the words to ask and breathed a little easier when she seemed to sigh and give up. 

“Lunch?”

She nodded. 

“C’mon, what are you in the mood for?”

“Whatever you’d like.”

Justin grabbed his jacket and opened the door to find Brian there about to knock. “What are you doing here?”

Brian looked over his shoulder and shook his head.

“My mother. It’s safe.”

Brian took a step back and Justin almost laughed. “She’s just a mom, not a demon. Come in.” He turned his attention to his mother. “Mom, Brian, Brian, Jennifer, my Mother.”

He watched his mother extend her hand and then watched as Brian turned on charm he saved for very very rare occasions. Justin had seen it exactly once, and it hadn’t been aimed at him then either. He sighed. “We were going to lunch…” 

“Join us.”

He heard his mother say it before he could stop her, and was about to rescind the offer when Brian’s smile became more dangerous and accepted. _Fuck._

“The diner?”

Justin glared at Brian. “I’m not dressed for it.”

“Sweetie, you look fine.”

Justin shook his head. “I’m undercover on Liberty Avenue, I’d have to dress like…”

Jennifer looked at him questioningly. “Like…?”

 

“Like I did when I was in high school.”

“Like a twink.”

“MOM!” then he sighed. “Yeah.”

“Well then what if we stay away from your job site today?”

They ended up having lunch at some place Brian knew of, south of the city, near the high-end malls and upscale suburbs. Justin tried to keep the conversation superficial but in the end both his mother and Brian were far too curious about the information the other had regarding his life. He sat and chewed a breadstick while the two of them politely, quietly, genteelly, grilled each other for information.

He watched them volley questions back and forth. Brian focusing on Kyle, occasionally switching topics to talk about Craig, and then back to Kyle and Justin’s dating habits. He made a mental note never to fuck Brian again… or at least today.

His mother, he noticed, seemed to focus entirely on Brian’s job, his friends, his son… on Brian. He wondered if Brian knew he was being fitted for a matching white suit. The look Brian gave him answered his question. He almost blushed. 

“Mom, leave Brian alone. We’re not dating. He doesn’t do dates.”

Brian nodded.

“And Brian, leave my mother alone, Kyle is none of your business and it’s possible she doesn’t want to spend this entire lunch talking about her shit of an ex-husband.”

Brian looked surprised but nodded. The conversation shifted to less controversial topics, like politics, religion, and PFLAG membership. Brian laughed “we should have introduced her to Debbie.”

“No, we shouldn’t have.”

“Debbie’s your boss’s wife?”

“Yeah, she’s the president of the Pittsburgh chapter.”

“Wait, Debbie Novotny?”

“Yes.”

“I thought your boss’s last name was Horvath.”

“She won’t get legally married 'til her son can so…”

“I was supposed to meet with her later today, she’s organizing a vigil among all the local chapters. A lot of gay men are dying you know.”

“I’m vaguely aware, oh, and working the case.”

“Well, I think a candlelight vigil would be nice, and make the public aware of what’s going on.”

Brian and Justin exchanged a look. “The less the public knows, the better. We’re trying to keep this low profile.”

“Which is easy when it’s just gay men who are dying.”

“It isn’t just gay men, but if the media turns this into a circus, it’s going to be that much harder to find out what we need.”

“Well I think it’s important that people know.”

“Mom, this is a terrible idea.”

“Did you tell Debbie that?”

Justin looked at Brian who shrugged. “I’m sure Horvath mentioned it.”

Justin laughed. “She doesn’t listen to him.”

“She doesn’t listen to anyone.”

“Well good for her.”

“Mom, I’m asking you. Don’t do this.”

Jennifer touched Justin's face and smiled at him. “Justin, I can’t just pretend this isn’t happening.”

“Try, for me.”

She shook her head and signed the bill. “Brian It was lovely to meet you. I’m off to meet this Mrs. Novotny, I’ll pass on your regards.”

Brian laughed and Justin ordered a drink from a passing waiter as his mother breezed by them both. “We’re fucked.”

“Mother’s are like that.”

“Is that why you don’t talk to yours?”

“There are a lot of reasons I don’t talk to mine. All valid.”

“Think we can get Debbie to call this off.”

“Not a chance.”

“Michael!”

“What about him?”

“You can get him to…”

“No, I can’t, and even if I could, she wouldn’t listen to him.”

“So….”

“So we pretend it’s not happening and keep working the case. What did you get from Morrison yesterday.”

“He’s pissed that I’m working on the bar.”

“How’d that happen?”

 

Justin looked down and considered his options. He shrugged. “Gary decided I’d paid my dues.”

“In two weeks.”

“I let him blow me.”

He watched Brian’s hands. His knuckles whitened as he pressed his fingertips against the table. He ordered a drink when the waiter brought Justin's. “Why?”

 

“I was too tired to keep putting off the inevitable. It’s just a blow job.”

“But you didn’t even want to be dancing on the bar, it was actually bad for the case.”

“I was exhausted. It had been a really long day, customer’s hands all over me, Morrison trying to convince me to expand my market, you being over protective and nosy.”

“Don’t lay this at my feet.”

“I’m not. I’m explaining that there were a lot of people asking for a lot that day. In the end, I gave in to the least annoying requests.”

“Morrison wants you to expand your market? What does that even mean?”

“It means I should blow any customers I’d like and keep half of the seventy five they’d pay for the service.”

“He’s trying to pimp you out?”

“He’s cracked.”

“Are a lot of his boys doing this?”

“I think the runners are, yeah.”

“Jesus.”

“I know.”

“Quit this job.”

“The gig at Babylon or the other one? Sadly working for Gary and Morrison is more lucrative.”

“I don’t fucking care. Do you?”

 

Justin shook his head. “You know I’m not in this for the money.”

“Clearly.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Brian shook his head. “Nothing. He dropped some cash on the table. “Let’s go. I’ll drive you home.”

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian parked in front of Justin’s building. “Brian it’s my day off.”

“You want me to go?”

Justin thought about it. “No, but absolutely no cleaning, redecorating, rearranging, or any other actions that might be construed as changing my domicile to appease your obsessive compulsive needs. Understood?”

“Far be it from me to try to alter your domicile.”

“Pfft.”

Justin walked towards the lobby, Brian followed. They took the elevator. Brian pulled him forward to kiss him. Justin pulled back. “We’re in an elevator.”

“Point?”

Justin shook his head and led Brian to his apartment. He unlocked the door while Brian ran his hands over his stomach under his shirt. “You’re close with your mother.”

“Could you please not talk about my mother while you’re trying to unzip my pants.”

“When would be a good time?”

“Never works for me.”

Justin turned around once the door was shut behind them. He pulled Brian’s head down for a kiss. Brian pulled Justin’s shirt over his head and then moved his hands lower to unzip his pants. Justin’s hands were working Brian’s belt. Eventually, mostly naked, they fell backwards together.

“See, told you this space needed an area rug.” 

“That’s why you wanted one?” Justin asked between kisses to Brian’s mouth and shoulders, “so that you could fuck me on it?”

Brian pulled back a little so Justin could see his expression. He smirked, “maybe.”

Justin shook his head. “You’re impossible. Fuck me.”

“Yes sir.”

Justin’s legs were wrapped around Brian’s waist and Brian reached out randomly trying to find his pants, or Justin's, any place a condom might be handy. Justin reached under the corner of the rug and pulled out a plastic square, he ripped it open with his teeth, and handed it to Brian. Brian raised an eyebrow. “Under the rug?”

Justin rolled his eyes. “I bought the rug for me, and it’s soft. Feel.”

Brian ran his hand over the surface of the wool, hand tied rug. “Nice.”

“Yeah, so…”

Brian shook his head. “You’re very smart. Now wasn’t I supposed to be fucking you?”

Justin nodded and curved his body into Brian’s as Brian slid his cock slowly into Justin. 

Almost an hour later they were both on their back. Brian was fiddling with a cigarette and Justin was shaking his head. “Not in the apartment. Go outside, there’s a balcony off the bedroom.”

“There is?”

“You know this.” 

Brian put the cigarette behind his ear. “I’ll wait.”

“Tell me you at least pretended we were going to work today and brought the information we’ve been waiting for on Morrison.”

Brian nodded again. “It’s over there somewhere.”

Justin rolled over and started looking through Brian’s pockets. He found the folded papers but dropped them again when he felt Brian’s mouth on the small of his back. 

Brian was swirling his tongue in the small of Justin’s back and felt him wriggle beneath him. He looked up. Justin was reading the full report on Morrison. Brian moved his mouth lower, his tongue teasing the spot where Justin’s back curved into his ass. He slid it between Justin’s crack. Justin rose up towards his tongue without his attention shifting from the paper in his hands. Brian more determined moved slightly, using his fingers to spread Justin’s ass apart. He began to trace his hole. Justin moaned and pushed back. When Brian chanced a look again, Justin was still reading the report.

“Justin.”

“Mmm?”

“Put the papers down.”

Justin rolled onto his back. “Vinny’s has seven locations.”

“I know.”

“Are they all fronts?”

“I have no idea.”

“Brian, look.” He pushed the papers back under Brian’s nose. Brian took them and sighed, Justin was single minded about all things, and if he’d decided they were going over the information… that’s what they’d be doing.

Justin rolled over again and stood up, he came back and sat Indian style on the floor. His laptop on the coffee table. He pulled up a file. Look, these are the non Liberty Avenue deaths. 

Brian glanced at the red dots and nodded. “Okay.”

Justin checked the page in front of them and then began marking blue dots on the map. “These are the other Vinny’s locations.”

“Means nothing.”

“They’re all close.”

“They’re in all close suburbs of Pittsburgh, at this point there’s been at least one death in each one.”

“So you don’t think…”

“I don’t think it’s time to come to conclusions.” 

Justin studied the map more closely. “I really think…” 

“Don’t that’s your first mistake.”

“Brian go home.”

Brian nodded. “I disagree with you. Excellent reason to decide I’m not worth listening to.”

“Shut up. That’s not what I’m doing. I’m trying to figure this out, and you shutting me down at every turn isn’t helping.”

“It is if you’re going off in the wrong direction.”

“And how are you so sure I’m going in the wrong direction.”

“Motive.”

“What about it?”

“What’s the motive? Why would Vinny, or whomever is running Vinny’s want to kill his customers?”

“I don’t know, I guess we’ll have to find out.”

“Good plan, make the case fit the prefab conclusion.”

“Seriously, Brian, go home.”

Brian moved the computer so he could see the screen more clearly. “They’re clustered.’

“I know.”

“But not around Vinny’s.”

“Yes they are.”

“Justin, do me a favor?”

“What?”

“Map the catholic schools.”

“What?”

“Map the private schools.”

Justin pulled up the information and then spent a few minutes transferring the information. “Shit. He’s targeting schools?”

“No. Look, there’s a Vinny’s near almost every private school in the western suburbs, now, are the deaths clustered around the schools or Vinny’s?”

“Or someplace else catering to the same clientele.”

“Aaaah, he can learn.”

“Fuck off. We need a list of stores in that area.”

“No, we need to find out where those kids get their drugs.”

“Should I go undercover in the schools?”

“And quit dancing in a cage?”

“I’m serious.”

“If we had that kind of time I might say yes, but we don’t. By the time you found someone willing to tell you where to score drugs, you could just as easily tell Morrison you want to branch out.”

“How would sucking some asshole’s cock help?”

“Branch out and sell in the suburbs.” Brian leaned closer and spoke slowly. Justin stood up and stormed off, unfortunately it was a small apartment and he was naked, so really, the bedroom was the only option. Brian followed him. 

Justin turned around. “Stop being an asshole, and stop fucking teasing me.”

“I’m not. I’m serious. See if you can hint about it to Morrison, find out who’s dealing out there…trust me, he knows.”

“You really think so?”

“The idiot twins are trying to find out from The Sap, but he’s stringing them along, I’ve read the transcript, I really don’t think he knows.”

“So we’re back to square one?”

“Not exactly. Brian wrapped his arms around Justin and kissed him. “Tomorrow, when you go back to work, you can work the high school angle with Morrison.”

Justin nodded against Brian’s chest. “Brian? I know you’re dying for that cigarette.”

Brian huffed out a laugh, “I am.”

“So could you go smoke it, and then chew some gum, and then, meet me back here?”

“Here?”

Justin moved out of Brian’s arms and positioned himself on the bed. His cock semi hard. He stroked it slowly. “Here.”

Brian shook his head. 

“No?”

“I don’t really need that cigarette.”

Justin laughed and Brian took the cigarette from behind his ear and placed it on the nightstand before stretching his body over Justin’s. 

Justin kissed him and then shifted his weight. Brian responded and rolled over until Justin was lying between his thighs and kissing his chest. “Do you have to go in today?”

Brian shook his head. “I’ve got the day off.”

Justin kissed him again. “Mmm, so we’ve got time to kill.”

Brian nodded and wrapped his arms around Justin’s waist. They were both lost in the feel of each other when a cough interrupted them.

Justin reached quickly for a blanket, pulling it over the both of them. “Jesus Christ! Knocking is good.”

Jennifer was leaning in the doorway amused Debbie was peering over her shoulder. “I knew it!”

Brian let his head fall back against the pillow in exasperation. “Any chance of the two of you getting out of here so we can get dressed?” 

Jennifer ushered Debbie towards the kitchen, closing the door behind her. Justin bounded out of bed and pulled on a pair of sweat pants. “Fuck, your pants are in the living room.”

Brian stood up. “I’ll get them.”

Justin shook his head and pulled on a shirt. He came back a moment later, tossing Brian’s pants at him. “Don’t even joke about walking around in front of my mother naked.”

“What’s left to see?”

“Brian…”

Brian laughed and pulled on his clothes. They both entered the main living area knowing that really, at this point, it was all just pretense.

Debbie started. “You have something against my candlelight vigil?”

Brian nodded and Justin crossed his arms. “It’s gonna make the media go insane.”

“That’s the point.”

“It’s going to make it harder for us to work the case.”

“Why? Something has to bring attention to what’s going on. The two of you aren’t doing anything to stop it.”

Brian sighed. “Debbie.”

Justin shook his head. “Don’t, Brian.” He looked into his mother’s eyes. “I know that look.”

Brian looked at Debbie and laughed. “Yeah, I know that one too. Do what you want. You always do.”

Justin made coffee and they were all sitting in a somewhat uncomfortable silence. Justin tried to break it by starting some small talk with his mother. It didn’t work.

“What are the two of you doing here?” Brian got straight to the point.

Jennifer looked surprised for a moment but hid it quickly. “I came to see my son, and Debbie said she had some lemon bars she’d been meaning to drop off.”

Debbie opened the Styrofoam box with a flourish. “Lemon bars.”

“Thanks.” Justin sipped his coffee and tried to figure out how to get all of them out of there. Brian solved the problem by standing up. “Well, we really should let the boy get some sleep. I know he didn’t get home until after the sun came up.

Both Debbie and Jennifer rose to leave. Justin saw them out and then turned towards Brian who, although he had put his shoes on, seemed to be making no progress towards the door. 

“Brian?”

 

“Oh, did you want me to leave?”

Justin pulled his shirt over his head. “Not really, we were in the middle of something.”

Brian took off his own shirt and followed Justin into the bedroom. “You know Debbie's sitting at the front of the building waiting to see if I leave.”

“I don’t care.”

Justin was on his knees; he looked back over his shoulder at Brian. “Why aren’t you inside me yet?”

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin’s POV

I shouldn’t be doing this. I think that almost every time we’re in bed together but nothing will crystallize the idea like your mother walking in on you. When you couple that with your boss’s wife… what am I doing?

I have no idea but as a slick finger finds its way inside me, I don’t care. I spread my legs wider and his finger is gone. His mouth is sucking hard on my balls and I think I whimper. 

No one has _ever_ had control of my body the way he does. It scares me. I try to hide that. One of the few things I’m sure of is that he hates when I seem scared. I’m not. Not usually. And now that he knows about the Pitcairn thing, well, he’s a lot more aware of what he does. That’s a good thing, and a curse.

I hate it when he’s this gentle. I hate it when he acts like I can’t take it. “Fuck me.”

I feel his cock, thick, hot, slick, sliding between my cheeks and I want him inside me, now. He pushes slightly, I bear down and rock back and he’s buried to the hilt. The pain makes me gasp. I feel the stretch and he’s stroking his hand through my hair. I rock onto him, fucking myself on him. He clasps my hip and moves with me. 

There’s nothing gentle about what we’re doing now. He’s slamming against me with full force and I want more. I’m groaning. His hand reaches for my cock and he’s stroking me off. Then he pulls out completely. I haven’t come, neither has he. I turn around and he pushes me back against the mattress. His hands almost cover my chest and then they move to my legs. He rests my calves against his shoulders and he’s inside me. Every time he moves it’s electric. My body stretched, inside and out. His covering mine and then his mouth is on mine, devouring me. He holds my legs up higher until it feels like his mouth on mine is the only thing keeping me on the bed. He rolls into me, deeper than anyone’s ever been and I grunt. Each thrust pushes the air out of my body and I’m close. So close. 

I reach for him and he takes my hands, our fingers sliding between each other’s. Curling around the others palm as he flattens my hands next to my head against the bed.

It would usually freak me out. I’m powerless. It doesn’t. He lifts his head so he can see my face. I raise my head up just a little. I want his tongue inside me again. He obliges and then I feel my orgasm building. 

It starts slow, almost unnoticeable against the onslaught of sensation, but then it becomes more insistent. My cock trapped between our bodies. Mine folded in half, his leaning into me, pressing me back down. I come between us and I tighten around him. He comes then too, sucking my tongue out of me, as I seem to be sucking the come out of him. And when we collapse we’re both sweaty and I sigh. 

I think I fall asleep because I don’t remember him pulling out. I don’t remember him moving beside me. I don’t remember him resting his head on my chest but when I wake up, that’s where it is. He’s asleep to.

I hear the sound that must have woken me. Someone’s knocking on my door. I dislodge him carefully and kiss the side of his face. He almost smiles and I’m just going to pretend that does nothing for me. I grab a pair of pants, pull them on and head towards the door. My mother really needs to learn to let go.

I pull the door open; ready to tell her to go home but it’s not her. I glare, he doesn’t move. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been trying to talk to you.”

“I’ve been tying _not_ to talk to you.”

I hear movement in the bedroom. Shit. “Stay here, I’ll be right back.”

I duck my head in to my room. Brian’s sitting up and seems to be contemplating that cigarette. “Stay in here okay?”

Brian looks up confused and I hope to Christ that for once, he listens to me.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Brian pulled on his pants and looked longingly at his cigarette, but in the end he tucked it behind his ear and moved towards the bedroom door. He listened.

“I’ve told you to fuck off.”

“Look, I’m not trying to…”

“I don’t care what you’re trying to do. How did you find me?”

“You’re not that hard to follow.”

“Fuck off before I call the cops.”

“I thought you were the cops.”

Brian froze. He inched the door open and saw the guy Justin had been trying to lose all week, annoying man, stalker boy, whatever. He was towering over Justin and he knew the kid was a cop. Brian opened the bedroom door. “Company?”

 

Brian was thankful that looks could not, in fact, kill. Justin’s eyes were shooting lethal, poison tipped daggers.

Brian extended his hand. “I’m Brian, and you are?”

“Daniel.”

“Daniel, and you’re here because?”

“That’s between us.” He gestured towards himself and Justin.

Brian nodded and settled himself on the sofa. He picked up the remote and started flipping through channels. “Don’t let me interrupt.”

Justin’s attention was torn between the two aggravating men. He ran a hand through his hair and refused to let Daniel into his apartment. “What do you want?”

“I wanted to warn you about Morrison.”

“Okay. And now you have.”

“What are you doing with him?”

“That’s none of your business.”

“Are you trying to bust him? It won’t work.”

“How is any of this your concern?”

Daniel put a hand on Justin’s shoulder and before Brian had a chance to move Justin had removed it, twisted his arm, and in fact Daniel’s entire body around until he was pressed against the door. He put a little more pressure on Daniel’s elbow. “Don’t touch me.”

Daniel’s face was smashed against the door. “I won’t. Fine, just let me go.”

Justin let the man go and took a step back. “Get lost. I mean it. I don’t care what you’re doing or why, just stay the fuck away from me.”

“Look, Morrison's a bigger fish than you know.”

“You don’t have any idea what I know, or don’t.”

“I know you think he’s a piece of the puzzle.”

Justin said nothing, his expression blank.

“He’s not. He _is_ the puzzle.”

“Thanks.” Justin moved to help Daniel out of the door. Daniel tried to push his way into the apartment. Brian stood up then. He positioned himself beside Justin, effectively blocking Daniel’s entrance and access to Justin. “We appreciate your help. Goodbye.”

Daniel looked up at Brian. “Your cover’s going to get blown soon.”

Brian made a move towards Daniel. “Are you threatening me?”

Daniel shook his head and took a step back. “No, nothing like that, but… people are starting to figure it out. I’ve seen you going in and out of his building.” His attention was on Justin now. “And if I found you here, how hard would it be for someone else to?”

Brian closed the door, moving forward as Daniel moved backwards. When the door was closed, everyone on the appropriate side as far as Brian was concerned he turned the lock. “Now will you get a deadbolt?”

“Fuck off.” Justin sat down visibly shaken.

Brian sat next to him. “He’s an idiot. Don’t let him get to you.”

“He found me. He’s right. We need to be more vigilant.”

Brian nodded. “So we’ll be more careful.”

“No more checking in, Brian.”

“Bullshit.”

“I mean it.”

“I don’t care.”

“I do.”

Justin looked up at him. “About what?”

Brian took his cigarette and wiggled it between his fingers as he walked onto the balcony. He stood on the tiny three foot by four-foot ledge, leaning against a railing that probably wouldn’t prevent anything from falling. He exhaled and hoped Justin forgot the question before he came back.

He cared. He did. He shouldn’t. Well, he should, about his partner, but not the way he felt when he thought about Justin getting hurt. And he realized Justin was right. They had to stay the fuck away from each other for a little bit. This was getting dangerous.

When he finished his cigarette he came back in. Justin was examining the scatter point plotting they’d done earlier in the day. 

“I’m going home.”

“Be careful.”

“I always am.”

“I mean about anyone seeing you leaving the building.”

“Justin.”

“Don’t. Brian, just… don’t. Okay?”

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t pretend you care, it’s creepy.”

“What if I’m not pretending?”

“That’s creepier.”

Brian nodded. He couldn’t disagree. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Justin shook his head. “I meant it. No more babysitting.”

“How am I going to know if something happens to you?”

“Nothing’s going to happen to me.”

“Famous last words.”

“I’ve been fine. I’ll be fine. I’ll talk to you later this week.”

Brian nodded and left. 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin made some microwave popcorn and settled back onto the sofa after Brian left. He picked up his phone to call someone and realized he really didn’t know whom to call.

He called Morrison, who sounded overly happy. The accepted the invitation to the party, and figured he may as well get started on the high school dealing angle sooner rather than later. 

He wanted to wrap this case up. Things were getting dangerous and complicated.

 

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Nine  


* * *

 

 

 

Justin was dancing. He was faking the high but that wasn’t difficult. Smooth rippled torsos and loud thumping music were enough to make him happy. He tried to remain alert. He was pretty sure that Morrison had not invited him here just for the drinks.

He turned to dance with someone when Morrison slid between them. His arms rested on Justin’s shoulders and Justin resisted the urge to push them off. He smiled up at him instead.

“Having a good time?”

Justin nodded.

The building was an old warehouse on the outskirts of the city. Not too far, actually, from Brian’s building, but far enough that all the buildings surrounding it were seedy, run down, and many closed down completely. 

Justin danced, watching and waiting for something to give him an opportunity. He eventually moved to get a bottle of water from a makeshift bar that had been set up in the corner. Morrison joined him. 

“Glad you could make it.”

Justin nodded and drank his water. Morrison offered him a bump but he shook his head. 

“You’ve got a lot of friends.”

Morrison shrugged. “More like acquaintances.”

“You’ve got a lot of acquaintances.”

“It’s a part of the business.”

“They’re all customers?”

Morrison smiled and Justin bit back the instinct to punch him. He’d had an odd day already and was feeling unsettled about the way he’d left things with Brian. Morrison being coy was not helping the situation. 

“A lot of them work for me.”

“Shit, you have runners in every club in town?”

“Something like that.”

“You know, I was thinking…”

Morrison kissed his temple, “you shouldn’t do that, you’ll get wrinkles” and walked away.

Justin decided that now would be a good time to leave. Punching the fucker seemed counterproductive and yet, he knew it would be gratifying. He started heading towards the door when a fat guy, easily three hundred pounds, grabbed his arm. Justin tried to pull away and realized the man wasn’t fat… he was a brick fucking wall. “What?”

 

“Someone wants to see you.”

“I’m leaving.”

The man just shook his head and Justin wished he’d brought his gun.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian didn’t go home. He went to the station to see if he could find out anything about Daniel, formerly known as Annoying Man.

He was pulling up information that was getting him nowhere when he felt a presence behind him. He turned. It was Billy. Brian glared at him and Billy looked nervous.

“What do you want?”

“I um…”

Brian quirked an eyebrow and waited a moment. When Billy didn’t seem ready to share anything else he turned his back to him and returned to his work.

“I wanted to get in touch with Justin.”

Brian didn’t turn around. “You two didn’t exchange addresses at summer camp?”

Silence. Brian continued scrolling down the page looking for anything that might help him. They had a lot of information but none of it seemed to be related. He knew they were missing a piece.

“Do you have his phone number?”

Brian sighed. “No. Fuck off.”

“I just…”

Brian did turn around now. “What? What is it you want to tell him? Write it down I’ll pass him the note in study hall.”

 

“Can you just…” Billy was holding out a piece of paper. “Just ask him to call me.”

Brian took the page and shoved it in his pocket. “I’ll make sure he gets it. Now could you scurry off? I have actual police work to do.”

Billy did indeed scurry and Brian almost laughed but then he came across some interesting information.

There was a Daniel Morrison Manicini. He scrolled further down the page, minor rap sheet, a bunch of juvenile stuff, sixty days in juvenile detention for joy riding, a couple of drug charges and then nothing. 

He ran a broader search and scowled at the screen. There was a picture of Annoying Man, identified as Daniel Morrison Manicini, apparently Morrison's cousin, Vinny’s brother’s son. 

Brian printed the information, including Daniel’s home address according to the DMV. He was staring at the screen, trying to make this make sense when Horvath called him.

Brian shut Horvath's office door, sat down and propped his feet up on the edge of the man’s desk. Horvath looked at Brian’s feet pointedly but Brian ignored him. “Can I help you?”

“What else have you found out?”

Brian gave him a rundown of what was already in his report; the connection between Morrison, Vinny’s and The Sap. He left out Billy’s desire to talk to Justin and Justin’s stalker being Morrison's cousin.

“You know that family is connected.”

Brian nodded. “Seems that way.”

Horvath was going over Brian’s report. “Not every kid that died went to one of the private schools near a Vinny’s pizza.”

“Did you only hang out with kids from your school? Well, maybe you did. It was before they’d invented the car right?”

Horvath flipped Brian off while he flipped through the pages of the report. “Did you file this officially yet?”

Brian shook his head. “Wanted you to see it first, and you told me to keep the Manicini name out of the records.”

“Where’s Justin?”

Brian shrugged. “It’s his day off. Mine too actually.”

Horvath looked up. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“Solving murders?”

“You think it’s murder now?”

“I’m not sure. I know it’s not The Sap.”

“The Sap is getting us nowhere, we’re either going to have to let him go or lock him up.”

“Let him go. He’s harmless.”

“He’s a drug dealer.”

“A harmless drug dealer.”

Horvath shook his head. “Let’s not have this argument again.”

“How’s Debbie holding up?”

“She’s been to two funerals in the past week. How do you think?”

Brian smirked. “How are you holding up?”

“Debbie thinks I can stop her boys from dying and I’m not. How do you think?”

Brian dropped the stress ball he’d been playing with back on Carl’s desk. “I’m going home. I’ll let you know if I find anything else out.”

“Brian, don’t…”

Brian looked back, “don’t what?”

Horvath shook his head. “Never mind, just be careful. Of all her boys, you and Michael, those are the ones she’d never recover from.”

Brian left, closing the door behind him.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin let “tiny” as he’d nicknamed him, lead him to a back door. He was pushed through it and it took a moment for his eyes to get used to the bright fluorescent glare after the dark, hazy green ambient light of the main area.

He blinked and then focused and again wished he had his gun with him. Several men, large, with less than friendly faces were sitting on an old orange sofa that had seen better days. Morrison was straddling a chair he’d turned backwards. He whispered something and they laughed. 

Then he turned his attention to Justin. “Wanna tell me what the fuck you’re trying to pull?”

Justin remained silent. 

“Gone silent? You’re usually so chatty.”

“What do you want?” Justin tried to sound menacing, or angry.

“I want to know why you’re playing the poor little college student when you’re not.”

Justin felt cold sweat run down his back. “Huh?”

“Don’t play dumb. Who are you working for?”

Justin’s stomach knotted. “You.”

“Gary called me. He knows what I’m doing. Did you tell him?”

Morrison stood up; there was a knife in his hand. Justin assessed the angle and his potential escape routes. The only door was blocked by “tiny” who was currently, literally, breathing down his neck. He swallowed and made sure his voice didn’t shake. “Why would I tell Gary?”

“You tell me.”

“I haven’t told anyone anything. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m getting the fuck out of here.” Justin tried to seem casual as he turned to squeeze between “tiny” and the door. The man moved and blocked his path completely.

Justin took a step backwards. Morrison wrapped his hand around Justin's wrist and pulled him forward. The knife was pressed between his shoulder blades. “Tell me who you work for.”

“You.” 

Morrison pushed him forward. “Don’t forget that.”

Justin nodded and “tiny” moved. He opened the door and took a deep breath of the smoky, warm air in the main dance area. He didn’t see much else until he was outside taking in gulps of cool evening air. It was almost midnight. He started walking back towards his apartment.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*

Brian was trying not to think about the way he and Justin had left things. It wasn’t working. He lit a joint, and gave up on the glass, drinking straight from the bottle while he replayed the last conversation in his head. Why had he admitted he cared?

He couldn’t fault Justin for his response. It _was_ creepy. They’d only known each other for a few weeks. He shouldn’t care this much. He was taking another draw when the door opened. Justin was sweaty and flushed. He moved towards Brian, taking the joint out of his hand, and inhaling deeply while unbuttoning the man’s shirt. 

He passed the joint back to Brian and concentrated on Brian’s pants. When the joint was out and they were both naked Justin pushed him back into a chair, his belt hanging over Brian’s shoulder, his mouth on Brian.

Brian wanted to process what was happening but copious amounts of Beam and really good chronic, combined with his partner, currently naked and hard, straddling his lap made focusing difficult. He moved a hand to the small of Justin's back, pulling him closer. Justin was fishing through their pants for a condom. He rolled it over Brian’s cock in record time and impaled himself. Grunting in what Brian had to assume was pleasure. His head higher than Brian's he leaned down for a kiss.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

 

I should have fucking gone home. Whatever, I need something solid and powerful and not scary. Something I can control. I need this. He’s amused, I can tell by his expression. He’s also stoned, and shit… this is _good_ shit. He’s pulling me forward and I find a condom. It hurts. I don’t care. I kiss him. He tastes good. He is good. He’s moving with me. I push my heels against the bar between the legs of the chair and ride him. He’s stroking my cock and oh god, pulling at my nipple ring and I know this was the right thing to do. I’m not sure what Morrison thought. I’m not sure what he thinks. I’ll figure that out when my head is clear. Right now, I just want to come. 

I’m moving faster, biting my bottom lip. I feel his lip trace where my teeth are probably leaving marks and I lean my head back. His mouth is on my neck, his teeth scraping my Adam’s apple. I lean almost all the way back, taking him deeper. His arms are around me and that’s the only reason I don’t fall to the ground. He leans forward, his lips skimming my torso. His tongue licking at my navel, and then moving up until he’s flicking my nipple ring again, pulling me forward with him.

His feet are planted on the floor as he pushes into me and I’m grinding down on him and when I come, it’s at the same moment he does, his head back, his face frozen in an expression that might be pain, but isn’t. 

We’re sweaty and his arms are wrapped tightly around me, his face pressed against my chest. His hands move and then stop. Fuck.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

I feel him come across my stomach and his own as I come. Then I’m holding him, catching my breath. We’re both sweaty. His back is slick. I pull my hand away and see red…literally. He’s bleeding. What the fuck? I pull away to look at him and then move to stand up, my arms still around him. He puts both hands on my chest to push me away. I hold him closer and look over his shoulder to assess the damage.

It’s a razor thin line, less than an inch long. I take a step back and he’s pulling his shirt back on… fuck that.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

“I’ve got to go.”

Brian shook his head and watched as the crimson bloomed on the back of Justin’s shirt. “What happened?”

Justin was pulling on his pants and sliding his belt through the loops. “Occupational hazard.”

“Which occupation? Last time I checked, being a go-go boy rarely leads to knife fights.”

“Knife fights? I scratched myself.”

“Between your own shoulder blades?”

“It was a misunderstanding.”

“Try again.”

Justin turned. He looked tired, and still a little shaky and Brian was almost certain that it wasn’t due to the power of his last orgasm. “Brian, it’s nothing. If you could stop treating me like an infant I might be more willing to tell you about shit like this.”

“I wasn’t aware showing concern that my partner might have been in a situation where someone was hoping to puncture his lung constituted infantilisation.”

“Yeah, well, it is.”

“Justin, I can’t help if I don’t know what we’re facing.”

“ _We’re_ not facing anything. I’m just working the case.”

“ _We’re_ working the case. Was it Daniel?”

“Who? Oh, right, him. No.”

“Was it his cousin, Morrison?”

Justin looked confused.

“If you had given me more than a second before you so brutally took advantage of my altered state, I would have been able to tell you what I found out about your little stalker.”

Justin sat down. “Daniel and Morrison are related?”

Brian nodded. “So who did this to you?”

Justin leaned forward, his head resting in his hands. Brian took the opportunity to sit next to him and push his shirt up, examining the wound. “It’s not deep, and it was cut clean. Let me get you a band-aid.”

Justin tried to swat his hand away but he was too tired. “Fine. So what else do we know about Morrison, or Daniel?”

“They’re connected.”

“Yeah, you said, they’re cousins.”

“No, not connected to each other.” Brian found the band-aids and antiseptic, he was walking back towards Justin. The bleeding seemed to have stopped. It had probably been reopened when they were fucking. Brian shook his head, trying to clear the image. 

“This might sting.”

Justin barely flinched and didn’t make a sound. “Connected.”

“Right, as in… organized crime.”

“I’m not sure how organized he is.”

“So tell me how this happened.”

Justin retold the story to Brian.

“So you went to a party, without even letting me know where you’d be.”

“You said you’d cut the babysitting shit out.”

“And the very day I did, you come in sporting a knife wound.”

“Oh my god, you are such a drama queen. It’s not a knife wound. It’s a scratch. You covered the whole thing with a band-aid. Tomorrow I’ll just put make up on it and no one will notice.”

“It’s time to stop working at Babylon.”

“No fucking way.”

“Justin, you can’t go back there. Morrison knows something is up.”

“No. Morrison _will_ know something is up if I disappear. He was testing me.”

“Some test.”

“Brian, I’m going home.”

Brian nodded. “I’ll drive you.”

“I’m…”

“A cop? Fine? Not a child? Capable of walking? You almost got stabbed an hour ago, I don’t think you can remember the last time you slept through the night, I know I sure as hell can’t and the busses have stopped running. You want to go home? Fine. I’ll drive.”

“I’ll stay here.”

“Don’t sound so excited.”

“You have a cleaning service.”

“So?”

“So if I bleed on my own sheets I have to clean them.”

Brian almost laughed. “C’mon princess. Bed time.”

Justin slid under the duvet. Brian’s hand rubbed down his back, feeling the bandage and gritting his teeth. Morrison, with a knife and a grudge. Not a happy combo. He tried to sleep but couldn’t. Justin was apparently having the same problem. He turned until he was facing Brian. “It’s not that big a deal.”

Brian tried to nod but knew even his non verbal affirmation was weak. 

Justin hand ran down Brian’s face. “It’s part of the job. We can’t do this if you’re going to get morose every time I get hurt.”

Brian closed his eyes. _Every time_ Justin knew the truth of it, there would be more incidents. Brian had a few small scars to show for his time on the force. He hated the idea of Justin having any. He froze. 

“What the fuck is going on?”

Justin looked confused. “You told me to sleep here. I’ve given you everything I have on the case.”

“It’s not the case.”

Justin nodded. “I know. This… thing…”

“Thing?”

“Heat, lust, whatever. It’s weird. I’m usually so finished with someone once I’ve spent as much time with them as I’ve spent with you.”

Brian grunted. “I don’t think I’ve ever spent as much time with anyone I fuck as I’ve spent with you.”

“Well, not with someone you’re not in a relationship with.”

“We’re not in a relationship.”

Justin closed his eyes and Brian knew it was not because he was tired, but because he _Knew_ Brian was missing the point on purpose. “I know _we’re_ not in a relationship, I mean, your last boyfriend.”

“I don’t do boyfriends.”

“They must get really frustrated if you never do them.”

Brian laughed. “Shut up, twat. You know what I mean.”

“Never?”

“What’s the point? Fucking, maximum pleasure, minimum bullshit.”

“Makes sense to me.”

Brian tried to ignore Justin’s hand which was currently running through his hair, caressing his face and now sliding down his arm, gently, erotically.

“So friends with benefits?”

“We’re not friends.” it came out more harshly than he’d intended. “Maybe we’re friends.”

Justin shook his head. “We’re not. We can’t be. This thing is not conducive to friendship.”

Brian wasn’t sure he agreed.

“Besides, if we’re friends, even fuck buddies, you’d still have to accept me as an adult. You have a problem with that.”

“I’m working on it.”

“No you’re not.”

“I am.”

“Really. So what the fuck would you do if you _were_ treating me like a child?”

“Not really sure. Probably outright forbid you to go playing with guys who play with knives.”

“You’re rhyming.”

“I’m tired.”

Justin moved further down under the duvet, his face against Brian’s chest. His legs tangled with Brian’s under the covers. Justin kissed his chest. “Sleep. Maybe things will make sense in the morning.”

Brian looked down at Justin who was working his way lower under the covers. His pink lips moving across his torso. He lost sight of him completely, but always knew where he was; his lips never seemed to lose complete contact with his body.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

It’s warm under the thick blanket and his body is softer than you’d imagine. He’s all hard edges when he talks. He can set up no trespassing signs with the way he holds his back straight and his arms to his sides but when he seems to melt against my lips, his stomach muscles fluttering, the signs say something very different.

It’s like a cave, dark, and hot, humid, dank, and pungent. The smell of his desire permeates. I can barely see, but by now I know my way around his body. He thinks he needs to protect me. The cut on my back really threw him. Threw me too at first, once I realized what it was. Now I know it’s just part of Morrison trying to scare me. Someone’s after him, he doesn’t know who. I know it’s me... but I wonder if I’m the only one… and then my ability to think about the case, the job, is gone. 

The only thing I can think of now is a blowjob. I want to taste him. I want to feel him come. I want to hear the soft whistle of his breathing while he sleeps peacefully. I don’t think I’m going to sleep tonight.

I put a hand on either of his cheeks and pull him towards my face. I lick the underside of his cock, and then move lower, sucking his balls and feeling his cock lying against my cheek. Soft and hot. When I take him in my mouth I do it all at once, opening my throat to him. I hear him grunt, and feel him stiffen, impossibly harder in my mouth. 

I taste the salty flavor of his pre-come. I’m hard too; I might come just from sucking him like this. He’s squirming a little. He wants to fuck my mouth, and I want him to. I move my hand off his hip and pull him even further into me. He gets the message and moves, slowly. I feel the muscles in his thighs flex and slide under the silk of his skin. I move my hand up his chest. His hand finds mine and he’s holding it like he needs it to survive. I know the feeling.

Whatever we’re dealing with here, the case and our dynamic, I’m just not ready to call it a relationship, whatever it is… it’s intense.

I’m enveloped by the smell, taste and feel of him. There’s no light filtering in, my other senses seem sharpened. I’m in a cocoon of desire and need and I don’t want to be anywhere else. I move my tongue around the sensitive spot under the head of his cock and then press hard on the slit. He groans and I open wide, letting him thrust deep. He does and I wrap my arms around his hips again and hold him there. Using my tongue and my throat to please him. I swallow and hum and his cock jumps in my mouth. I resist the urge to gag. He’s moving again, this time spreading his legs. I lick my fingers, stroking his cock with them, and then slide my hand between his thighs. He sighs and I slip my finger between the crack of his ass. He tenses for a moment but then pushes deeper into my throat, curling his body over mine, even while he’s on the blanket and I’m under it.

It’s darker and hotter now, his weight holding me down. My finger reaches his hole and stays there. He moves again, trying to angle for me to push it inside. I do, slowly. I feel the resistance. I’m careful but he’s pushing back on it. I slide it as deep as it will go. My other hand still in his.

I swallow around him again and feel it the moment I hit his prostate. His has my hand in a death grip, and he’s thrusting back against my finger, and then into my mouth. 

There is nothing but him. Under the covers, no light, little sound, just his cock, sliding against my tongue, touching the roof of my mouth and then pushing back. My finger buried deep into him. The tight heat on my finger and the warm dark heat around me. I fell like I’ve crawled inside him. I suck harder, hollowing my cheeks, moving my finger inside him while his body responds as if we’re connected. I’m going to come.

I moan against his pubes when my nose is buried in them and he’s fucking my throat. I press hard on his prostate and he makes a noise loud enough to penetrate the layer of thick duvet and beautiful man, both of which are keeping me safe and warm. I swallow around him as he comes and his body is shaking. His hand is still in mine, and his other arm is running along whatever part of me he can find under the blanket. I come a moment later and the warm spatter of come mixes with everything else, leaving me floating like an infant in the womb. Safe, secure, innocent, untouched by life. 

After he comes I stay there. My face resting on his belly, hearing his breathing slow. Feeling his body relax. I don’t want to move, and I don’t think he wants me to. He sleeps. I feel his body unclench in a way that I’ve only seen when he’s asleep.

I lay there; my head nestled on his belly, feeling safe.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin woke up struggling to move. Brian was half on top of him; the duvet was twisted over and around his body and Brian’s. He panicked. He was flailing, trying to move the sheets. He almost screamed. Then he was free. Brian moved off of him and pulled the duvet off of the bed entirely. The sudden chill drew goose bumps on Justin’s skin. He was shaking and he knew it.

He refused to meet Brian’s eyes, couldn’t take the concern he knew he’d see there. He walked towards the kitchen and poured himself some juice, downing it quickly. 

Once he had the coffee started he turned around, glaring, challenging Brian to say anything.

Brian was in bed, smoking a cigarette and watching him. “We’ve only been asleep for a couple of hours. Come back to bed.”

Justin closed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m fine. I need some coffee and then I have errands to run.”

Justin watched Brian carefully. He was tired of being treated like a child and he was tired of this little dance.

He sighed and launched himself off the kitchen counter where he’d been sitting. He moved towards the bed and took Brian’s cigarette out of his hand crushing it into the ashtray.

He stretched his body over Brian’s fitting himself against his lean torso. “Fuck me first?”

Brian pushed him back and shook his head. “Sleep first.”

“I’m not tired.”

“Yes you are.”

Justin stood up again. “Fuck you. I’m taking a shower.” He twisted his arms over his head and stretched his entire body, his back cracking. He moved his neck until it cracked a few times too. Then he smiled over his shoulder and headed towards the shower. 

By the time the water was at a comfortably hot temperature Brian was standing behind him. “You play dirty.”

“I’m in the shower, that’s clean. And who says I’m playing?”

Brian’s hands stroked down Justin’s body and Justin bit his lip. If he paid too much attention to his little scratch from last night he was going to lose it. Brian, apparently, realized this and moved his hands lower. Justin was surprised when Brian’s mouth followed.

He could do little more than brace himself, hands spread against the tile when Brian’s fingers moved to spread his cheeks. The hot water slid between his crack and over his hole and then Brian’s tongue was there. He felt him licking and probing, moving slowly until neither of them could stand slow anymore. Justin spread his legs wider and Brian’s tongue was inside him, his hand between his legs, stroking his cock, cradling his balls. Justin moaned, his head back. The hot water hit him directly in the face and he knew it was the only thing keeping his body from spontaneous combustion.

Brian’s tongue stopped fucking him. He almost whimpered. He was so close. Then strong hands on his shoulders turned him around and that tongue was in his mouth. He could taste himself. He sucked Brian’s tongue, the water running between them, their cocks pressed together as Brian bent his knees to ensure the perfect angle. They came like that, Brian's arms around Justin, Justin’s hands on Brian’s ass, pressing him closer. They never said a word. 

The silence continued while Brian washed Justin’s hair, and Justin washed Brian’s back. Brian tried to dry Justin off but he took the towel and moved away.

“We have to stop this.” Justin wanted to take the words back the moment he’d said them, but he knew he was right. “This is getting us nowhere.”

“It’s getting us off.”

“But we can do that with anyone.”

There was a long pause while both of them considered a fact neither really wanted to admit… they couldn’t do _this_ with just anyone. There was something more. Justin moved forward and took the towel from Brian’s hand. He stood on his toes and pulled Brian in for a kiss. “We have to stop this.”

Brian pulled his bottom lip into his mouth and nodded. “You’re right.”

Justin felt something inside stretch to almost breaking. He took a deep breath. He’d been waiting for Brian to admit he was right. This wasn’t what he wanted to be right about. “I’m going to go. I’m working tonight so I’ll talk to you in a couple of days.”

Brian shook his head. “We can stop this. Checking in is part of the job.”

“But…”

“Justin, why did you come here last night?”

“Huh?”

“Very eloquent.”

“What are you talking about?”

 

“Last night, you, here, why?”

“Because I wanted to tell you what I’d found out.”

Brian shook his head. “I don’t think so.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“The truth might be novel.”

“I was scared, okay? I got scared and I didn’t want to be alone.”

“That makes sense.”

“I guess.”

“Everyone is alone, Justin. Realizing that can be fucking terrifying.”

“So we just fuck someone we know?”

“Works for me.”

Justin laughed. “I’ll bet it does.”

“Pretty sure of yourself, huh?”

 

“Shouldn’t I be?”

“So tonight, after your shift, check in… or better yet… quit.”

“Not time to quit yet. Soon though.”

“Did you find _anything_ out about the high school angle?”

“That’s what I’m gonna work on tonight.”

“I’ll be there.”

“I can’t even imagine what I could say that would make you _not_ do that.”

“And here I thought you had such a vivid imagination.”

“Even I can’t imagine you taking the advice of your partner, or anyone else for that matter.”

“I don’t want you there alone.”

“Why not?”

Brian looked like he was about to scream. He didn’t. “I’ll be there.”

“I can’t even talk to you. What possible good can come of you being there?”

“I might find someone hot suck my dick.”

“Well, there is that.” Justin finished his coffee and rinsed out the mug, putting it in the dishwasher. “I’ve got a bunch of shit to do. I’ll see you later.”

“Later.”

Justin closed the door behind him and breathed. He recognized that they’d settled nothing at all. He wasn’t sure what to do. He dialed a familiar number. 

 


	10. Chapter 10

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Ten  


* * *

 

Justin walked towards his home while he talked. 

He was no closer to having any answers when he got off the phone and let himself into his apartment. He threw the phone onto the sofa in frustration and went to the kitchen staring at the inside of his refrigerator for a full five minutes before admitting to himself that there really wasn’t any food in his house unless he was in the mood for peanut butter on… fuck, he was out of bread. He sighed and turned on the television. Nothing appealed to him. He paced and laughed at himself when he startled at the sound of the phone ringing.

“Hi.”

“Honey, I’ve been thinking about it and I think…”

Justin cut his mother off. “I shouldn’t have called you. I’ll figure it out.”

He could hear his mother’s expression over the phone. He sighed. “What? What do you think?”

“I think maybe you’re just scared.”

“I’m not afraid of him.”

“I didn’t say you were scared of Brian. I think maybe you’re afraid what will happen if you admit that you care.”

“Nothing will happen, I’m not going to do that. Besides, it’s not like I’ve _never_ been in a relationship.”

“Well, you and Kyle were always more friends than anything.”

Justin sat down and rested his feet on the coffee table. “I know, that’s what was so great about it.”

“So, what’s great about this?”

Justin wasn’t sure exactly how much he wanted to share with his mother. “The sex.”

Jennifer laughed, “well, that’s _something_.”

“Yeah, but in this relationship, it’s _everything_ , which would be fine except he acts as if there’s more.”

“And you don’t?”

“No, I knew this wasn’t a long term thing.”

“Does that mean it can’t be?”

“I don’t fucking know.”

“Well, think about it. I’ve got to run. Will you be at the vigil tomorrow?”

“I don’t know, I have to check with…”

“Brian” they said in unison.

Justin laughed. “It’s about the case.”

“I’m sure.”

“Goodbye mom.”

“Take care, Justin.”

 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian tried to fall back asleep after Justin left. They were both beginning to run on empty. He pondered, briefly, if that might be why everything seemed surreal and more intense with Justin. He decided it was definitely sleep deprivation and closed his eyes. An hour later he was still trying to find a comfortable spot moving himself, his pillows, the blankets. Nothing worked. When he grabbed a pillow from the other side, _Justin’s side_ no no no _NOT_ Justin’s side, the _other_ side of the bed and draped his arm over it, the scent making his dick twitch a little he exhaled and let himself drift. Brian slept.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin didn’t manage to get much accomplished. He’d been determined to run some errands today, pick up a few things, get some groceries. In the end he’d laid in bed, tired, but not able to sleep. After tossing and turning for almost an hour he reached into his drawer and found what he was looking for. He lubed it well and closed his eyes, imagining it was Brian filling him, fucking him. When he came, moaning Brian’s name, he fell back onto his pillows and closed his eyes. Justin slept. 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin was late getting to Babylon. He’d overslept and then showered quickly, stubbing his toe on the way out the door. He missed the first bus and gritted his teeth while he waited for the next. When he got there Morrison was leering at him. He ignored it, changed into his costume and took his place in the cage at the corner of the bar. 

He smiled at the customers and wondered what it meant that Gary knew about Morrison. 

Did the other officers who were working the case know that Justin was running for him? Did they think he was on the take? His thoughts switched gears while he considered Brian’s living conditions. He never had found out where Brian’s seemingly endless supply of money came from. He filed that away. It would be a good thing to talk to him about tonight. It could keep them occupied. Justin refused to even consider the possibility of them falling back into bed together. The sex was getting in the way of the case, and if Debbie hadn’t already told Horvath, well, then there was still a chance that once this was over he could keep his job, work his way up to detective.

He smiled as a man whispered into his ear and pushed several hundred dollars under his waistband. He looked over the man’s shoulder and made sure Morrison was watching. He touched the guy’s shoulder, running his hand down to his elbow, then he moved against him, his hand cupping the customer’s ass. Morrison nodded; he’d gotten the message. Justin pushed him away gently and went back to dancing.

When he finally got a break Morrison was waiting for him in the small back area reserved for changing costumes and stashing dancers’ street clothes. Justin glared at him and then sat down with a beer, relishing the feeling of not being on his feet. 

Morrison stood over him, and Justin didn’t even care that he was trying to loom. “What?”

 

“I need you to do something for me when your shift is over.”

Justin looked up at him. “I told you I wasn’t into…”

“Not that kind of thing. I need you to make a delivery for me. Here’s the address.” He handed Justin a piece of paper. 

Justin nodded. “What do I need to deliver?”

“It’ll be in your locker when you finish tonight.”

“You have a key to my locker?”

Morrison Just cocked an eyebrow and smirked. Justin gritted his teeth against hitting him. “Hey, you know, if you’re looking for someone to…” 

Morrison turned his back and walked away before Justin could even mention the possibility of working the high school areas.

Justin dealt with the usual drooling patrons and a couple of Morrison's customers for the next couple of hours. When he got his next break Brian was standing near him. Nothing new there. He tucked his fingers into the waistband of Brian’s jeans and dragged him to the back room.

Brian was nuzzling his neck. “That desperate for me?”

Justin pushed him against the wall, leaning in until his mouth was next to Brian’s ear. “Morrison wants me to make a delivery after work.”

Brian growled and Justin pushed against his chest a little harder. “I’ll do it, I don’t see a way out, but I’m giving you the address.” Justin moved his hand towards Brian’s fly; pushing the paper Morrison had given him into the pocket of Brian’s black jeans before he pulled the buttons open. He heard Brian groan.

“Justin.”

“Shhhh, you’re not supposed to know my name, now fuck me, so no one suspects that we’re just talking.”

Brian kissed him and turned them until Justin was against the wall. 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian was surprised when Justin dragged him to the back room. His surprise was tempered with concern when he mentioned his post shift mission for Morrison. After that, there was nothing but a buzzing in his ears. The hot feel of Justin’s breath against his ear. He was promising him he’d be safe. 

“you can’t promise that.” he whispered back, then he sucked on Justin’s earlobe.

“trust me, for once, just trust me.”

“Justin…” Justin seemed about to say something else, so Brian moved his hands down Justin’s waist until they were grasping his hips and turned him around. Justin rested his forehead against the wall. 

“Brian…”

He lowered Justin’s red spandex shorts below his ass and worked a lubed finger into him. Justin’s body was riding Brian’s finger like it was his cock. “It’s too dangerous, don’t do it.”

“God, just fuck me.”

Brian slid into him and wrapped an arm around his torso. “I mean it. Don’t do this.”

Justin pushed back onto Brian’s cock. “This?”

“You know what I mean, it’s is a bad idea.”

“Just find out where I’m going.”

“I’m going with you.”

“No fucking way. Mmmmmm, god, Brian… I just want to know if I’m walking into a trap.”

“You are, _thrust_ , Trust me.” Justin’s head fell back against Brian’s shoulder. His arms were straight and his fingers spread against the wall, giving him the leverage to push against him, taking him fully inside. “For once, _thrust _,__ trust me. Christ, you’re tight.”

__

__“If it’s a__ major __, _thrust_ , __package we’ll call it in and , _thrust_ , bust Morrison for good.”

Brian bit at Justin’s ear. “Listen to me, twat. You’re never gonna get Morrison. He’s connected, seriously so. Maybe you, _thrust,_ should talk to stalker boy.” Brian’s movements were speeding up, his breathing becoming erratic.

Justin’s hand moved down to his own cock and Brian’s joined him. “Maybe I’ll talk to Daniel tomorrow, , _thrust_ , for now, just…god, don’t stop.”

Brian grunted and felt Justin’s ass convulse around him, almost pushing him out with the force of his orgasm. He pulled Justin closer, grunting as he came. Then he breathed across Justin’s ear, “I want you safe.”

Brian withdrew and Justin turned around, rearranging himself in his costume. He kissed Brian, their tongues sliding against one another. “I can take care of myself.” 

Brian stood watching him leave. In the low light he could barely see the mark between Justin’s shoulder blades from the previous evening, but he knew it was there, and it seemed to be staring at him accusingly. He wanted to stop him, stop this but Justin wasn’t ready to let it go. He considered calling Horvath but instead simply left, heading home to check out the address and see what he could find before Justin’s shift ended.

 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Justin got dressed and found a courier bag in his locker. He slung it over his shoulder, refusing to look inside until he was out of the club.

Morrison watched him, meaningfully. Justin nodded at him once and left. Brian was at the end of the alley and Justin could feel Morrison watching him as they got closer. He walked past Brian, not even acknowledging his existence. He continued walking feeling rather than seeing Brian follow him. Justin let himself into the back of Brian’s building and waited in front of the loft door. Brian was there moments later.

“Brian, did anyone see you?”

“See me what? Leave Babylon and stagger home?”

Justin relaxed a little. “Sorry, I’m getting a little paranoid.”

“Good.”

“Good?”

“I’d feel better if I thought you were taking this seriously.”

“You don’t think I am?”

“I’m not so sure.”

“Brian, just tell me what you found out about the address.”

“It’s zoned residential, under the last name Manicini.”

“What? Shit, why doesn’t he deliver it himself then?”

“Because this is a test.” Brian nodded towards the bag. “It in there?”

Justin nodded. Brian shut the loft door and set the alarm before opening it. He shook his head, “Justin, No.”

Justin swallowed hard. “I have to Brian.” 

“I’m sending backup.”

“You can’t. He’s going to be watching.”

“Justin, you can’t walk around with at least a thousand tabs of E. Brian grabbed a towel from the counter and used it to pick up the plastic wrapped package. “Shit.’

“What?” Justin leaned over Brian’s shoulder and almost threw up. “Is that?”

“Justin. Give it back and tell him you can’t.”

“Brian, I have to do this.” they looked at each other. Justin wondered if he looked as green as Brian did. In the plastic bag under the E was a bloody finger. “Maybe it’s not real.”

Brian turned the bag upside down 'til the digit in the plastic wrap fell to the table. They both looked at it carefully. “It’s real. And we have to turn it in. do you have any idea whose it is?”

Justin shook his head.

“Justin, go over there.”

“Why?”

“Because you probably don’t want to watch this.”

“Watch what?”

“I’m getting a fingerprint before you deliver it. We need to know who it belongs to.”

“I’m guessing they’re not missing it.”

“We don’t know they’re dead.”

“We don’t know anything.”

“Justin.”

“Fuck off. I can handle it.”

Brian dug around under his sink until he found what he was looking for. Then he went fishing in a drawer in the credenza. 

“Why do you have surgical gloves?”

Brian smiled and made a fist. Justin rolled his eyes.

Brian carefully rolled the bloody finger over a piece of packing tape and spread it carefully onto the printer paper he’d retrieved. He threw the finger back in the plastic, and then all of it back into the courier bag. “I’m following you, then I’m going to the station.”

“Go to the station, I’m going to have to go straight home after I do this.”

“Back here when you’re done, or you can meet me at the station.”

“Brian.”

“This isn’t babysitting, Justin.”

Justin shook his head. “If it feels safe.”

Brian sucked his lower lip into his mouth and Justin knew there was something more he wanted to say. “I’ll call you if I can’t make it here.”

“Make it here.”

Justin slung the bag over his shoulder. “So how do I get there?’

Brian gave him directions and Justin repeated them back, he was on his way out the door when Brian pulled him back. “Justin.”

“What?”

Brian lowered his mouth to Justin’s and kissed him. Justin responded in the exact way he’d promised himself he wouldn’t. They continued the kiss for a while. Clutching each other tightly, mouths fused. When they finally pulled away Justin reached up to peck Brian’s cheek. “I’ll see you later.”

“Later.”

He shut the door behind him.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian smoked, and paced, and waited. Two cigarettes and a shot of beam later he tucked the fingerprint into the inside pocket of his jacket and got into his car. Fifteen minutes later he was at the station. He ran the prints and cursed. It was almost four in the morning and Horvath was, he was sure, asleep, he considered calling him anyway, not sure what his next move should be.

He pulled up the information again, checked it a third time. Daniel. Why had Morrison had his cousin’s finger cut off, and to whom was Justin delivering it?

Brian did a more thourough search on the address, on Daniel, on anything he could think of. He wanted this case solved and he wanted it done now, before Justin got hurt… more seriously hurt he amended as he flashed on the image of the blood stained t-shirt currently in his trash can at home. 

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin was used to wearing his gun when he was in uniform, and equally comfortable not wearing it when he wasn’t. Right now…he wanted his gun. He found the address and left the bag on the front porch swing as the note requested. He knew it was almost four in the morning. The house was dark. He turned to leave and a porch light went on. Next door a dog barked. Justin ran.

He kept running. He wasn’t sure if anyone was following him, or if it was his own heartbeat in his ears, the echo of his own footsteps on the empty street. There was no time to slow down and find out. He didn’t stop until he was back on Liberty Avenue. The lights never turned off on Liberty. He stopped, leaning against a wall, bent forward, hands on his knees, trying to take in oxygen. He couldn’t. His hands shaking from the adrenaline he fumbled in his pockets. Shit, no inhaler. He hadn’t had an asthma attack in years. He tried to think where he’d last seen his inhaler. He thought it might have been in the drawer by his bed when he still lived at home.

He gasped again and heard the strangled sound. There weren’t many people on the street and none near him. He tried to call 911. He dropped the phone. When he bent to pick it up, the world went black.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian was driving home; it was a little after four. Justin still hadn’t called. He headed down Liberty considering breakfast at the diner. He stopped when he noticed several people gathering around a body. 

He pulled the jeep to the curb and got out, wondering if Morrison's special blend had claimed another life. People were bent over. Someone was calling 911. He looked and saw blond hair against the pavement and pushed everyone out of the way.

“Justin.”

Louder this time “Justin!” 

His heartbeat thundered in his ears. The light from the streetlamp was dull, but under it, Justin looked blue. Brian pulled him forward and checked for a pulse. There was one. He was breathing but Brian could hear the strain. The ambulance showed up just as Justin was regaining consciousness. The EMTs helped Justin to the ambulance. They asked him a million questions about his asthma and eventually, after listening to his heart and lungs, let him go. Brian watched Justin stand on shaky legs. He led him to the jeep and drove him back to the loft. 

“Shit.”

Brian looked at him. “You okay?”

“Yes. I got spooked, I guess.”

“By anything in particular?”

Justin shook his head. “I think it was the general, delivering a dismembered finger to the family kind of spooked.”

Brian almost smiled. “Why don’t you carry an inhaler?”

“Because, as I told the oh so helpful, EMTs, I haven’t had an attack in years.”

“Still.”

“Brian, can we not make this another ‘why Justin needs a pacifier and a crib’ speech?”

“I just think you need an inhaler.”

This time Justin almost laughed but Brian saw he was still shaking. He parked behind the building and they took the elevator together. When the got inside the loft Justin seemed confused. “What am I doing here?”

 

“Finding out what I learned about our mysterious bodiless finger.”

“Oh, right. Well?”

“It’s your little stalker’s.”

Justin sat down heavily and Brian moved towards him. Justin held his hand up, stopping him. “Just… just…give me a minute, okay?”

Brian nodded, hovering near the sofa, unwilling to move further away, following directions and not moving any closer. He picked at a fingernail, and waited. Justin was shaking visibly. Brian moved and got Justin a blanket. He came towards him slowly, and not from behind, draping it gently over his shoulders. Justin pulled it close. “Thanks.”

Brian moved carefully, sitting on the other end of the sofa, wanting to touch Justin, afraid to disturb the delicate equilibrium he seemed to be trying desperately to control. 

Justin didn’t look up. “Did you find out whose finger was… I mean, who…” 

Brian answered him mid sentence. “Daniel”

“Daniel?”

“Daniel.”

“Why?”

 

“You’d have to ask Morrison.”

“I think it might be time for me to quit dancing at Babylon.”

Brian nodded. “Yeah, I think it might.” He moved closer to Justin, still not touching him, waiting for a reaction. Justin didn’t move. Brian laid his hand on Justin’s knee over the blanket. Justin’s hand made it’s way out of the blanket and rested on Brian’s. 

“I’ll tell The Sap after my shift tomorrow.”

“After your shift?”

“We still don’t know why.”

“We’re not even sure we know who.”

“I’m pretty sure we know who.”

“You’re that sure it’s Morrison?”

“No, I think it’s Daniel.”

“The guy without a finger?”

“It makes sense.”

“Only in that twisted quagmire you call a brain.”

“Insult my intelligence, that’ll get you laid.”

“I’m not trying to get laid, and I was questioning your sanity, not your intelligence.”

“You’re not trying to get laid? Really? Justin opened his arms and straddled Brian’s lap, wrapping himself and the blanket around the both of them. He kissed Brian, grinding his ass against Brian’s lap.

Brian leaned his head back and smiled. Then he pushed Justin off of him. “Not this time.”

Justin looked confused. 

“You’re not distracting me. People are dying, we have no idea why and the person we think might be killing them is, quite possibly, on to you. Fucking is not going to convince me that you should still be working at Babylon.”

Justin shrugged. “True, but then again, nothing you say is going to convince me that I don’t need a little more time with Morrison. You’ll find Daniel tomorrow, and we can question him.”

“Or notify his family.”

Justin paused for a moment. “Or that.”

Brian turned to face Justin who still looked pale, and was shaking again. “Besides, I’m not really into watching you turn blue and pass out. Maybe you should just take it easy.”

“Christ, Brian, have you ever trusted anyone to make their own decisions?”

Brian stood up and poured himself a drink. “There are people I trust.”

“I’m not one of them?”

“That’s not what I said.”

“Then what?”

Brian sat down, bringing the bottle with him. “I trust people to look out for their own best interests. I also notice people have a tendency to lose sight of their own interests when they work too hard trying to make other people happy.”

“Is that what you think I’m doing?”

“I think you’re trying to impress Horvath, and me, and maybe your mother, or the other cops, or the assholes in Pitcairn. I think you think you have something to prove, and you’re willing to risk your own safety to prove it.”

“I’m trying to stop people from dying.”

“How’s that working out?”

 

“Fuck you.”

“Justin, the deaths haven’t stopped. All we know is that Morrison is involved somehow, and we’re not even sure of that.”

Justin opened his mouth to talk when Brian’s phone rang.

“Brian, two more deaths.”

“Fuck, when.”

“We just found them. They were both at Babylon tonight. Montgomery says they were both seen with Justin.” Brian froze. “Brian?”

“It’s Morrison. I’ll fill you in when we get to the station.”

“We have no proof.”

“We do. I’ll talk to you soon Carl.”

“Where’s Taylor now?”

“He’s here.”

“It’s five thirty in the morning.”

“We’ll be there soon.” Brian hung up the phone. “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going?”

“To the station, two of your customers died tonight.”

“Two?”

“Morrison's getting sloppy, or…”

“Or someone else is.”

Brian nodded and grabbed his keys Justin followed him. 

“My customers?”

“Both guys were seen ‘dancing’ with you tonight.”

“Oh fuck, Brian…”

“It’s not your fault.”

“Yes it is. I knew this shit was killing people and I sold it to them anyway.”

“Because you’re trying to stop more deaths.”

“Well, that’s working, isn’t it?”

“Justin, there was nothing you could do.”

“And what about Daniel, was there anything I could do for him?”

“We don’t know what happened to him. Don’t start worrying about it now.”

“Why not? Do you really think I’m not in some way responsible for two men dying?”

“I think you were trying to help.”

“Bullshit. You didn’t think I should be working for Morrison in the first place. And you just finished saying that I’m doing all of this to impress someone. Oh fuck…”

“Not working for Morrison was about your safety. These guys put themselves in danger, they knew the risks. It’s been in the papers, on the news, Christ, they’ve had assemblies about it in the schools. It’s not your fault.”

Justin stared straight ahead, his expression grim and Brian knew Justin wasn’t convinced. 

When they got to the station Brian parked and Justin glanced around suspiciously before he went in. Brian knew Justin was worried about blowing his cover but who the hell would be watching the police station at five in the morning? He ushered Justin inside.

They sat in Horvath's office, waiting for him and sipping stale coffee. “It might have been…”

“Don’t start speculating. Let’s see what we find out.”

They didn’t have to wait long. Horvath came storming in with a sheath of papers in his hand. He slammed them on the desk. “Two more deaths, both regulars at Babylon, neither known for overdoing it when it comes to shit like this.” Horvath sat down and stared at them. “Tell me what you know.”

Justin began to speak but Brian interrupted him. “Morrison's dealing the killer shit. I’m not sure what he’s stepping on it with but it’s not all of his stash. He’s doing it on purpose though. I think he’s got a turf war going on with his cousin.”

Brian saw Justin’s head turn to stare at him. He had wanted to share the theory with Justin earlier but it seemed more prudent to leave him out for a moment.

“I’ve got a couple of sources who say that they were getting their shit from either The Sap or Danny, who is Morrison's cousin. Now, Daniel can’t supply shit and we know The Sap's not selling them anything at the moment, so it’s all coming from Morrison, making that kid rich.”

“So, why’s he killing his customers?”

Brian shook his head. “I don’t think he is.”

“Then who?”

“Daniel, well he was, 'til…”

Justin’s full attention was on Brian now. “You think that’s why Morrison took his finger, as a warning?”

Brian nodded. “I do.”

“So it’s not Morrison, it’s not The Sap, it’s Annoying Man?”

Brian shrugged, “that’s my hunch.”

“It makes no sense.”

“Has anything about this case made sense?”

Justin stood up, pacing. “That’s not right. If Daniel were spiking the punch, so to speak, how? And with what?”

“Talk to the runners, I’m guessing they’re the ones who are changing the inventory at the last minute.”

“It’s a stretch.”

“Not really. Who’s gonna buy from you now? Who’s going to buy from any of Morrison's boys now?”

Horvath looked up. “When did you become one of Morrison's boys?”

“Long story. A while ago.” Justin was still pacing. He didn’t notice Carl’s face turning a shade just shy of the color of his wife’s hair. “Brian, if it’s Daniel… where is he?”

“I’ve got them running a check on hospitals in the area, a wound like that.”

“Wound like what?” 

Brian turned to Carl, “Daniel lost a finger last night, well, it’s not lost, we know where it is.”

“I think it was his father. This whole thing seems to be some sort of family bullshit.”

“Get me proof of everything, yesterday. And Taylor…” Justin looked towards Horvath, “the undercover thing is over. You’re out of there.”

“But I’m so close.”

“To what?”

 

“Morrison trusts me. He can help me find Daniel, we’ll…”

“We’re bringing him in. You won’t have a chance to talk to him.”

Justin shook his head. “He won’t admit shit to you. You’ve got nothing on him.”

“We’ve got your testimony.”

“Which will get him a couple of years for conspiracy to distribute. He’s bigger than that.”

“You’ve got one more day. If you can’t get me anything by this time tomorrow, you’re outta there and off the case.”

Justin nodded. Brian seemed about to say something and Justin glared at him.

“Find Daniel, he’s the key to all of this.” Brian told Horvath over his shoulder as he ushered Justin out of the office.

On the way towards the car they ran into Billy. He approached them. Justin glared. 

“I need to talk to you.”

“What?” Justin was clearly annoyed. Brian didn’t leave his side.

“Not here. Call me on the number I gave you.”

Justin looked confused. Billy looked at him, “you didn’t give it to him?”

Brian shrugged, “slipped my mind.”

Billy sighed and pulled a notepad out of his pocket. He scribbled a number down. “Call me in an hour.”

Justin took the paper and Brian noticed he seemed careful not to let Billy get too close, and even more careful that their fingers didn’t meet during the transfer. “It better be useful information.” 

Brian steered Justin away from Billy and into the jeep. “Well…”

“Don’t Brian. Just take me…”

“To the loft?”

Justin nodded. “Yeah, fine, whatever. The loft.”

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

I lean my head back and let the cool air blow through the open window. It feels good. I’m exhausted and confused. I try to sort through all of what I’ve just learned and it makes my head hurt. 

Daniel’s killing people so Morrison's reputation gets fucked over and at the end of it all, it’s to impress their fathers or uncles? All those people are dead so a couple of greasy pizza makers will be proud? It’s not fair, and it’s just… wrong. And if Daniel’s doing it then why did he try to warn me, or was he trying to recruit me. He wouldn’t, not if he knew I was a cop. Fuck. None of this makes any sense. Brian’s hand is on my knee. That feels good.

We get out of the car and my knees feel like Jell-O my back hurts, my head hurts, my chest still aches from trying to draw enough air during my little asthma thing and the only thing that feels right is Brian’s arm around my waist. His hand is sliding under the waistband of my shirt. I lean against him and let him guide me into the elevator, through the door and towards the bed. I kick off my shoes and drop my jeans, to tired and sore to take off my shirt. He does it for me. 

I crawl under the duvet, and I’m not sure if I want him to fuck me or just let me sleep for about a year. I guess he decides I need the sleep because he walks away. I miss him, and I know that’s insane because he’s on the other side of the loft, not the world. He sets the alarm and comes back up the steps. “Safer.”

I nod. It probably is. I’m pretty sure my cover is completely blown. There’s no way Daniel protected my secret in favor of his finger, so anything Morrison wanted to know, anything Daniel knew, I can now assume Morrison knows. The thought scares me but I still think we have a better chance of settling this if I talk to Morrison personally. Fuck, I’m supposed to call Billy. I sit up to get my phone but Brian’s in bed now and his hand is on my chest pushing me back down. “Justin.”

Great, now I’m hard because he said my name. What the fuck is wrong with me. His mouth is on my neck and I have neither the energy nor the desire to sit up, or move, or be anywhere but here, with his teeth gently pulling at my ear. His tongue sliding around the edge of it while his fingers stroke my nipples.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

He’s tired and I should let him sleep. Hell, I’m tired too but I can’t stop touching him. He scared the shit out of me. Fucking kid, fucking asthma. He tries to sit up but I push him back down. It doesn’t take a lot of effort. He’s in no hurry to leave this bed. I’m in no hurry for him to leave this bed.

My hands stroke his chest. I feel his nipples harden under my fingers. I run my tongue along the curve of his ear and he shudders. My hand is moving of it’s own volition. I swear it is. My fingers touch the head of his cock, already wet, leaking against his belly and I move the covers a little, working my mouth down his body to meet my fingers. He sighs again.

I revel in the feel of his soft smooth skin under my lips. My tongue sliding across the surface, my lips pulling at the skin. I want to nibble at the spot near his belly button but he’d kill me if I left marks because he’s planning on working tomorrow. The thought kills me.

I’ve been against him working at Babylon since he started but now… now we know the danger and he’s still set on doing it. He’s going to get hurt and I’m trying to tell myself that he’s my partner and I can protect him. I don’t believe the second part. I suck at lying to myself. He is my partner and it’s my job to protect him but I’ve failed every single time I’ve tried. 

My lips touch the head of his cock, my tongue relishing the salty taste of his pre-come and then I really can’t think about the case anymore. I lick along the base, swirl my tongue around the head, and it’s almost muscle memory. Trust me, I know how to suck a cock, but with him… my head’s a little more in the game. His body moves, he tries to get more of him inside my mouth and once again we’re on the same page. I take him inside, feeling his heartbeat as his cock throbs against my tongue, knowing when I’ve pleased him as he jerks into my mouth.

I deep throat him and he grunts, pushing up into me. I let him. He fucks my mouth, his hands in my hair. I listen as he gasps, straining my ears to see if I hear a wheeze, waiting for another asthma attack but that’s not where this is heading. He’s moving faster now. He spreads his legs and my fingers are stroking his thighs, tracing the curve of his balls. He’s moaning a little as I cup his balls and pull them away from his body, staving off his orgasm for a moment, but it’s just that, a moment. He’s coming and I pull my head back to taste him. He bends his knees, planting his feet on the mattress and bucking into my mouth. I move my hands to his hips, not stopping him but guiding him.

When his hips fall back to the bed I move up his body, kissing him, sharing the taste with him. He wraps his arms around me. “Brian, please, fuck me.”

I stretch my body over his. He wriggles under me and then turns over, his ass pressed against my cock. “Please.”

I don’t need him to beg, hell, I barely needed him to ask. I press a lubed finger into his ass and he’s stretching like a contented cat, squeezing himself against my finger, grinding his half hard cock against the mattress. I don’t even bother with a second finger. My cock is at his hole, pressing gently, he pushes up onto it. I wait, not fucking him, just letting him adjust. He doesn’t take much time to do so and then he’s pressing back against me, slowly. I’m afraid to move. I hold myself perfectly still while he eases against me until our bodies fit together like puzzle pieces.

He melts into me, and an arm reaches back to pull my head down to his shoulder. I kiss the spot where his shoulder curves into his neck. Tiny pecks all across his the back of his neck while he rocks under me, slowly, almost leisurely. He’s not in a hurry to get off, he just did. I can wait all night, or I tell myself I can. He lifts up again and I wrap my arms around his torso tightly, he can’t get away and he’s safe here… I want to stay here forever.

Loud sirens and alarms should be going off in my head, and I’m sure, if I weren’t sleep deprived and completely stymied but everything we’d just found out, they would… but they don’t. I think forever again and there’s nothing in my head screaming or flailing adding a hundred qualifiers. This is where I want to be, holding his body while his ass grasps my cock…forever. 

But the reality is there’s no such thing as forever, and he begins to move faster. I match his rhythm and now he’s begging me to fuck him. I do. I’m a sucker when he begs, or I’m just a sucker. Either way, I feel the fingers of electric fire spread through me and I can’t hold back. I come, pressed against him. He’s pressed against the sheets and he comes too. 

I roll us over, out of the wet spot, and he falls asleep while I’m still inside him.

My hand strokes his hair, feeling it’s softness, watching the contented smile on his face. I kiss the corner of his mouth and fall asleep with my fingers wrapped in blond silk.

__


	11. Chapter 11

 

  
  


* * *

## Blue Ecstasy

## Chapter Eleven   


* * *

 

 

 

Justin woke with a start. He pulled away from Brian. Brian’s arm moved as Justin sat up until his hand found Justin’s. He gave it a little squeeze. “You okay?”

Justin nodded. “Yeah, I was supposed to call Billy.”

“Good thing the nightmare woke you up so you could call him.”

“Who said anything about a nightmare?”

Brian was lying on his side, he looked up at Justin, “you didn’t have to.”

“Whatever.” Justin was digging through the pile of clothes beside the bed. He found his phone and Billy’s number.

“It’s Justin.”

“Justin, I need to talk to you.”

Justin tried not to roll his eyes. “So talk”

“We need to meet.”

“Why?”

“Not over the phone.”

“Christ, what’s with all the cloak and dagger shit?”

“Just meet me at Babylon.”

“When?”

“Now.”

“No.”

 

“Justin, it’s important.”

“Then give me something.”

“It’s about Daniel.”

“What about Daniel?”

“I can’t say more.”

Justin sighed. “Fine, I’ll be there in an hour.”

“Around back.”

“Of course.”

He hung up and knew Brian was waiting for an explanation. “Billy claims he has information about Daniel. I’m meeting him at Babylon in an hour.”

“Babylon’s not open at nine in the morning.”

“I’m meeting him _behind_ Babylon.”

“Okay, lets shower and then…”

Justin cut him off. “ _I’m_ meeting him, me, alone, not you, not us, me.”

“Bullshit.”

“Fuck, Brian, I am so very very tired of this argument.”

Brian was sitting up now; Justin’s legs were dangling of the edge of the bed. He ran his finger lightly over the “scratch” Morrison’s henchman had left with his knife. Justin turned to look at him… “It’s nothing.”

“I know.” Brian’s hand ran over Justin’s fingers. “You have ten of these.”

“So lots of spares if I lose one.”

Brian sat back. “Go, do this alone, talk to your little playmate from Pitcairn. You know this is dangerous and you won’t protect yourself? Fine. What if Billy’s working for Morrison, or Daniel, or The Sap, or just still hates the idea of a gay man on the force. You bulletproof?”

“You think he’s going to shoot me, in broad daylight?”

“I think if he does, you might feel a little silly, you know, bleeding all over the asphalt without having a chance to tell me you were wrong.”

“Yes, I’d hate to miss out on an opportunity for you to say ‘I told you so.’”

“That could ruin our work dynamic. So would you being dead.”

“You need to stop assuming the worst.”

“You need to stop ignoring the possibility that you could get hurt.”

“Fine, so under my red half shirt, I’ll wear a Kevlar vest.”

Brian seemed to consider it for a moment, then shook his head, “it would completely destroy the line of the shirt. Wear it under your jacket instead.”

“I’ll tell you what, I promise I’ll call you as soon as I’m free to do so.”

“Not good enough.”

“You want me to wear a wire?”

“Yes.”

“I was kidding.”

“I’m not. Wear a wire.”

Justin fell backwards on the bed. “Fine, I’ll wear a wire so you can hear the mind numbingly boring lack of information Billy has.”

Brian rolled over and Justin wrapped his legs around his waist. Brian kissed his neck.

“Where do you suggest I wear the wire?”

Brian’s hands ran down Justin’s body, circling his nipples. “Taped to your chest?”

Justin shook his head. My shirts are too tight for that. 

Brian's hands skimmed Justin’s waist and settled where the waistband of his jeans would be, if he weren’t naked. “Here?” Justin shook his again, wrinkling his nose. Brian laughed and moved his hands over Justin’s hips, curling his fingers around the curve of Justin’s ass. He gave him a questioning look. They both laughed when Justin shook his head. 

His hands moved between them, encircling Justin’s cock. He arched an eyebrow and Justin laughed. “Well, if we put it there, and they find it, I’ll already be in deep shit trouble.”

Brian’s fingers wrapped around Justin’s erection, he stroked slowly. “You’re already in deep shit trouble”

Justin tilted his head away from Brian’s kiss. “We have to stop now if we’re going to have time to get me wired before I go meet Billy.”

He watched as Brian stretched over him and reached for the phone. He tried to listen but Brian continued to stroke him while he talked and Justin’s ability to concentrate was severely compromised.

“I’ve got my tech wonk coming over in twenty minutes.”

“So we’ve got fifteen minutes to fuck and five minutes to shower.”

“We’ll save time if we fuck _in_ the shower.”

Brian stood up. Justin brushed past him and started adjusting the water temperature. Less than a minute later they were both inside the shower. Less than a minute after that, Brian was inside Justin.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin got dressed while Brian consulted with O’Malley, his personal technical guru. When Justin emerged O’Malley shook his head. “He’s twelve.”

Brian and Justin both laughed. “He’s on the force, trust me.”

O’Malley stood up and circled Justin. Brian glared at him and Justin smirked at Brian. Finally he turned to Brian, “I’ve got just the thing.” He rummaged through a bag of wires and cables until he pulled out a black cord interlaced with cowry shells and adjusted it around Justin’s neck. He tapped one of the shells. “The microphone’s in this one.”

“Where’s the camera?”

O’Malley tapped a shell in the middle. “But it’s broken, that’s why I have it. Supposed to be replacing it.”

Justin laughed. “I was kidding. There’s really a camera?”

“Not a functioning one, no, but the audio works.”

Brian took the speaker to the other side of the room. “Turn it on. Justin, walk away, I want to make sure this works.”

Brian watched Justin walk to the other side of the loft and disappear into the bathroom. “Good, now say something.”

The speaker hissed and then he clearly heard Justin’s voice. “Overprotective asshole”

Brian nodded. “I’ll have it back to you by this afternoon.”

“So I take it I’m not filling out paperwork or requisition forms on this.”

“I’ll see you later.” Brian ushered him out the door and closed it. He turned around. Justin was leaning against him. “Can O’Malley hear us?”

Brian shook his head and held up the speaker. “Just me.”

He kissed Brian, pushing him against the door. Brian wrapped his arms around him. “Just be careful.”

“I always am.”

He kissed the top of Justin’s head and Justin felt Brian’s hand slide under his shirt. He wiggled away. “My back is fine. Would you cut that out?”

“No.”

“Brian…”

“I’m just reminding you _why_ you need to be careful.”

“It’s almost nine. I’ll be ho… back here by eleven, scouts honor.”

“You were a scout?”

“No.”

Justin left and Brian waited almost five minutes before leaving to follow him. He was at the elevator when he saw Justin come up the last of the stairs, taking them two at a time.

“Where did you come from?”

“Second floor landing, I _knew_ you didn’t trust me. You’re going to get me hurt.”

“I thought you said Billy wasn’t a threat.”

“He’s probably not. But if you antagonize him, or make him think I don’t trust him…”

“Do you?”

“No. I’ve never trusted him. Now I’ve got to go. You stay here, O’Malley swears you’ll be able to hear me as long as I’m in a three mile radius.”

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin walked down Liberty Avenue, he ignored the men who were cruising him, and ducked down the alley to the back of Babylon. Billy was skulking near a dumpster but doing a lousy job of it. He was in uniform. Justin almost walked away.

“You’re in uniform.”

“I’m working.”

“I’m undercover. I can’t be seen here talking to you.”

“Undercover for who?”

“What?”

“Whom are you working for?”

Justin was confused and then he heard footsteps behind him. Fuck. He turned and tried to scream but a hand came over his mouth and nose. He saw Billy nod at whomever was holding him before he turned and walked away. He tried to kick but “Tiny” caught his feet. He assumed the man behind him; the one with his hand effectively blocking his airflow was one of the others he’d seen at Morrison's that night. He struggled again, hoping Brian heard something. He tried to twist his head and as he did, the choker caught on the button of a leather blazer. It fell and Justin saw it as if in slow motion. It disappeared into the bottom of a puddle, and then the world went black.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian heard Justin talk to Billy. The idiot was in his uniform. He listened as he unlocked the drawer where he kept his gun. There was silence. He waited. He heard a muffled sound. He couldn’t identify it. No more words. He took his shoulder holster off the hook in the closet and put it on. Dead silence, no sound at all. He loaded his gun quickly, shoved it into his holster, pulled a leather jacket over his black t-shirt made sure he had his badge and wallet and slammed the door behind him.

He drove quickly down the access street behind Liberty Avenue. When he got to the back door of Babylon he stopped. Deserted. He stood, his hands limp at his sides, looking for something, anything that would tell him what had happened, where Justin was. There were no signs of a struggle, but sneakers on asphalt wouldn’t really leave any. He kicked randomly at some loose gravel and tried to get his brain to stop buzzing. He knew he was panicking, he just couldn’t think of anything else to do.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin blinked a couple of times but the room was too dark. He felt nauseas and bit back the bile he could taste in his throat. He tried to remember anything after the necklace falling but he couldn’t. He moved his head and moaned. His neck hurt. He was sitting. He wanted to lie down. He moved his hand to assess the damage. He couldn’t. For a moment he thought he was paralyzed but as he calmed his breathing he realized he was just restrained. He tried to free his arm but it was tied, or…he moved it again experimentally, taped to the chair. His vision got a little better in the dim light. He could just see the outline of a door. There was no furniture that he could see other than the chair to which he was currently tied. He tried to move the chair. It didn’t budge. He rocked back and forth to no avail. His legs were strapped down as well. 

The panic increased exponentially with each moment. His arms and legs immobile, his neck hurting, his head throbbing. He began to breathe rapidly, images of Pitcairn flashing. He heard voices muffled, far away, he did the only thing he could think of. He screamed.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*

Brian called Horvath and gave him the information needed to put out an APB. Carl passed the information along quickly and demanded, in no uncertain terms, Brian’s presence at the station, immediately.

He drove there, distracted, going over everything they knew and looking for any sign of Justin. There was none. He knew every cop would be looking for him, but that didn’t help. Billy was working for Morrison, or Daniel, clearly, and one of them had Justin. His heart lurched. He parked in front of the station and took a deep breath. He carefully arranged his expression to one of bland disinterest and walked into Carl’s office ready to diffuse his wrath and move on to the important business of finding his partner.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

The light blinded Justin when the door opened. The figure in front of him was backlit and he couldn’t make out his features. The door shut before his eyes could adjust. He started to say something, hoping to reason with his captor but instead his mouth was covered. He began to struggle with more intensity. He felt the skin on his wrists and ankles become raw, and he didn’t care. He tried to move his mouth but the duct tape was wrapped all the way around his head now. He took deep breaths through his nose and willed himself not pass out. Now was not a time to show weakness.

His heart was jack hammering in his chest and he felt the cold sweat run down his back. A drop slid between his shoulder blades, the salt stinging the cut he’d been trying to get Brian to ignore. He knew he’d never hear the end of this if he got out of it alive… he tried to focus on what the man, who was now behind him, was saying, but all he knew was he’d give anything to hear Brian say “I told you so” right now.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*

Horvath glared as Brian told him what he knew of the situation. “You wired the kid without my knowledge or permission?”

Brian nodded glumly.

“And now he’s missing.”

“Yes, Justin’s missing, so reading me the riot act is not going to help the situation. We’ve got to fucking find him!”

Horvath picked up the phone. Brian was pacing. Horvath was talking to Billy’s sergeant. Brian looked towards Carl hopefully. He shook his head as he hung up the phone. “He didn’t show up for work last night. No one’s been able to find him.”

“Maybe they got him too.”

“Maybe.”

“We’ve got to find them.”

Horvath glared. “Really? And here I was going home and take a nap.”

Brian threw the paperweight he’d been tossing back and forth against the wall. “They know he’s a cop! They’re going to kill him.”

“Who?”

“I don’t fucking know.”

“So do we just break down every door in the city?”

Brian sat, defeated and tired and Horvath seemed to take pity on him. “I know, he’s your partner, and you care, but we can’t just run around like the keystone cops, looking under rocks. We have to think.”

Brian nodded and tried to reason the cold fear away. “Thinking is probably called for.”

Horvath almost smiled. “I’ve seen you do it before. I know you’re capable of it.”

Brian stood up and went to his desk. He spread every pieced of information he and Justin had gathered out on his desk and stared at it, trying to find some rhyme or reason to it all. He wanted something to jump out and declare Justin’s whereabouts. Nothing did. He shuffled the papers, rearranging them. Still nothing.

He couldn’t sit and stare any longer. He left, heading back the scene of the abduction.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

 

Justin tried to get his breathing under control. He inhaled deeply through his nose. He knew he was panicking, and he knew in the long run that it was against his best interest to do so. Didn’t matter, he couldn’t help it.

He bent his head forward, trying to feel the choker around his neck, wondering if maybe the vision of it falling had been a dream, a nightmare. He couldn’t feel it and he just _knew_ that it was gone. He tried to determine where he was.

No windows, a single door. The man with the duct tape had put it down behind him. Justin turned his head as far as he could. The pain in his neck made it more difficult but he could just make out the corner of a table, or desk. He thought there might be some shelving behind that, he couldn’t be sure. Something looked familiar. He tried to focus. It was dark, and even with his eyes adjusting to the light it was still almost impossible to make out any details. 

The light filtering through the edges of the door confused him. It didn’t seem like daylight, the color was too blue. He rocked in the chair again and it began to move. He looked down, but couldn’t see the legs of the chair from this angle. He struggled against the restraints on his arms and legs, trying to free even one hand. He twisted his wrist and felt some give. He did it again, it hurt, the skin was rubbed raw but it felt easier to move, he pulled hard.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian’s POV

Stupid little twat. I _told_ him he was going to get hurt. Fuck! I’m wandering around the area behind Babylon, so are two uniformed officers. They’re not going to find anything, there’s nothing to find. But they do. They hold it up and I move closer, it’s that choker, the one O’Malley gave him, the one I told him to wear. It’s broken… I think I’m going to heave. I nod, confirming it’s his. I hear us talking in my jacket pocket and realize I still have the receiver. I hand it over to them and they look at me like I’m an idiot. I am. He told me I was going to get him hurt…what if they found it? I shake my head. They couldn’t have, I heard… I heard nothing. I want to find Billy. 

I leave, driving towards his reported address. It’s not even a residence. I curse. It’s one of those places where you can rent a postal box that lets you have a real street address, great. Another dead end. I try to think, I can’t. Justin’s gone. I try to ignore the thought and figure out how to find him. Instead I keep flashing on images of his mother’s face when I have to tell her. 

There’s no good way to tell a cop’s family that their loved one is gone but this…this is my fault. I should have pulled him out of this sooner. I never should have let him get involved in the first place. Debbie’s going to kill me. Horvath's going to kill me. I may just save them the trouble and kill myself. I can’t…

Gary's, I call Horvath, he’s distracted, and assures me that they’re checking Gary's home, the address I gave him earlier where Justin ran his little errand. They’re checking inside Babylon, and at the known addresses of Daniel and Morrison. They won’t find him there… he’s long gone, I can feel it. I go to the diner. I need coffee.

I’m sitting in a booth, mentally going over everything we know for the hundredth time when Debbie sits across from me.

 

”They’ll find him.” 

I nod. _No they won’t._

She takes my hand. “Listen to me kiddo, I know you think this is all your fault but he was a tough kid, and he didn’t put up with any bullshit. If he wouldn’t even listen to Carl, what makes you think he’d listen to you?”

There’s nothing to say, so I say nothing.

“He’ll be okay. He only looks like a kid. He’s strong, I know.” I look up, and I guess she sees my confusion. “His mother told me what happened, in Pitcairn, if he could keep going, keep working there, move to a bigger tougher city, after that, then nothing’s gonna hold him back.”

They didn’t have guns. They didn’t cut people’s fingers off just for fun. I want to tell her all of this but there’s no reason to make her worry more, or doubt what she’s saying. I let her hold on to the fantasy that Justin is bulletproof. Only one of us needs to have the image of him bleeding to death alone, abandoned by his murderers and me. I drop a five on the table and walk out. She calls after me but I ignore her. She means well, but she’s not helping.

I go back to the loft, pacing and thinking and trying to retrace the steps, all of them, that led us here. How the fuck did this happen and why am I this rattled? This is what’s wrong with getting involved with your partner, something happens and you get rattled. If I’m shaken, I’ll make mistakes. I can’t afford to make a mistake. Justin can’t afford for me to make a mistake.

I call Horvath. “Gary has a wine cellar.”

“We checked. He’s not in there. He’s not in the storage room behind it.”

“Where else have you checked?”

“The delivery Justin made last night? It _was_ to Daniel’s father. He doesn’t have Justin. Neither does Morrison's father.”

“Which one of them is actually Vinny?”

“They both are, well, they used to co-own Vinny’s pizza. Now…”

Brian interrupted, “I don’t care. Carl, where the fuck is Justin?”

“We’re trying to find that out.”

Brian hung up and went back down to his car. He headed towards Justin’s apartment hoping to find something there. Maybe Justin was hiding something. Maybe Justin was home, and didn’t know he was scaring the shit out of everyone. Maybe he knew Billy’s address. 

~**~*~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin’s POV

I’m actually getting somewhere with the tape on my wrists. I can wriggle them around. I try to pull my hands out but they won’t fit. I move my thumb a little and it slides but not enough. It hurts and I realize that one of the reasons it’s gotten easier is that I’ve rubbed my wrists raw. They’re bleeding. I can feel it dripping off of my hand. I try to use the reduced friction to ease my arms out, but it’s not working. I pull harder, I feel more than hear the pop as my thumb dislocates but it’s enough and my hand is free. I’m about to start working the tape on my other hand when the door opens again.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian found Billy pacing in front of Justin’s apartment door. His reaction was swift and violent. He slammed Billy against the door, his hand around his throat. “Where is he?”

Billy seemed to be trying to answer but his face was turning deep purple. Brian lowered him to the ground and took a tiny step backwards, blocking Billy’s escape, but allowing him enough oxygen to answer the question. “Where is he?” He repeated slowly, carefully, menacingly.

“I don’t know.”

“Who has him?”

“I don’t know.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I… I wanted to make sure he was okay.”

“You know he’s not okay. Who asked you to arrange the meeting?”

“Morrison, but he said he just wanted to scare him.”

“And did he?”

“Morrison didn’t show up. It was two other guys. They told me to get lost once they had him.”

“Where’d they take him?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t see a car but…”

“So these guys, did you know them, would you recognize them if you saw them?”

“I…I… I think so. What do they want with Justin?”

“Well, you confirmed he’s a cop, so I’m guessing they’re going to kill him.”

Billy turned white and Brian couldn’t help feeling similarly. Did you hear them drive away or do you think they took him someplace close?” Billy shook his head and Brian pushed him to the side.

“What are you doing?”

“Breaking into Justin’s apartment. You have a moral issue with this suddenly?”

Billy shook his head and Brian kicked the knob twice. The wood of the doorjamb splintered after the second kick. He pushed with his shoulder and the door opened. Brian pushed it again. He was inside. He considered not letting Billy inside, but then considered the very real possibility of his only lead taking off. He dragged Billy in as well. “Stay there and don’t touch anything.” 

He didn’t wait for Billy to respond as he sorted through the papers sitting on top of the entertainment center. Bills, a couple of cards, nothing helpful. He moved to the coffee table and booted up Justin’s laptop. He searched the files, but still couldn’t find anything that would lead him to Justin. He stood in the middle of the living room and scanned the apartment. On a whim he kicked the area rug back. A few condoms. Nothing that would help. He moved to the bedroom, checking under the bed, between the mattress and the box spring, in the drawers. Toys. He almost smiled until he realized Justin might never have a chance to use them again. He may never have a chance to use them on Justin again.

He moved to the kitchen… nothing. He turned; Billy was cowering in a corner, not far from the door. “Tell me everything you know.”

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~*~**~**~*

The man crouched down in front of Justin. “Got your arm free?”

Justin didn’t respond.

“If I take the tape off, will you talk?”

Justin nodded. He didn’t promise to tell the truth, or get anyone in trouble but he needed the tape off his mouth.

He felt it pull his skin and hair as it was removed. “You’re a cop.”

Justin didn’t respond. “Who’s coming after Morrison?”

Justin shook his head. In truth, as far as he knew, at the moment, no one.”

“Everyone if you don’t release me.”

“They know where you are?”

“Of course.” Justin hoped Tiny’s buddy bought his bluff.

“So they should be here soon.”

Justin nodded.

“Then why are you so scared?”

“I like to be able to use my hands.”

The man glanced down at Justin’s free hand. He picked it up and put pressure on the pad of his dislocated thumb. Justin winced. “Seems to me you don’t have full use now.”

Justin tried harder to loosen his leg. He pulled his hand back. “Let me go, I’ll tell you whatever you need to know, but not like this. What’s gonna keep you from killing me if I’m still immobilized?”

“What do you think would keep me from killing you even if you weren’t?”

Justin’s blood ran cold. He clenched his fingers and although he couldn’t use his thumb tried for an uppercut into the man's jaw. Strong thick stubby fingers wrapped around his bleeding wrist, pressing into the raw flesh, causing Justin to wince. The man laughed. “If Morrison didn’t want to talk to you, you’d already be dead. And don’t try to hit me again, it’s embarrassing to watch.”

Justin struggled but it didn’t stop the man from re-taping his hand, this time behind his back where struggling out of the bonds would be even more difficult. He renewed the restraints on his legs and other arm as well, ensuring that Justin’s forearms were unable to move. He had no leverage. He was trapped.

“They will find you.”

“No, but they’ll find you. Well, they’ll find your body, bits of it, all over. Think your partner likes puzzle games.”

“I think he’s probably going to kill you.”

“I don’t think some fucking fag is going to be able to take me.”

“I think you’ll be surprised.”

“You talk to much.” And with that, he put a length of tape over Justin’s mouth and walked away, leaving him in the dark.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~

Brian was searching under the bathroom sink, having checked every other place he could think of when his phone rang.

“Kinney.”

“We got a call. They want to work something out.”

“Work what out?”

“They’re willing to give us Justin back, if we drop the charges.”

“That’s bullshit. They’re playing us. They know we can’t do that.”

“We’ve got a team on it but I think they’re trying to get us out of the way. They say they’ve got him in West Virginia.”

“So they’re adding kidnapping a police officer and taking him over state lines to their list of charges? Do they _want_ the FBI involved?”

“I’m not sure. We’re checking before we report it to them.”

“How much trouble is that going to make for you?”

“Don’t worry about me.”

“How much time does it buy us?”

“A couple of hours.”

“They want us gone. Why?”

“I don’t know.”

“I think he’s still close. Have we checked all business and residential locations registered under Manicini, or their dummy company?”

“We’re working on it. There are thirty of them, including, as it turns out, the building next to Babylon.”

“Have we checked that?”

“Yeah, it’s an old warehouse, full of crap they apparently import and export.”

“Did you bring the dogs in?”

“We’ve got them heading in now.”

“Carl, he’s not in West Virginia, they have no reason to take him there.”

“I know.”

Brian left Justin’s apartment. He turned to Billy, “get them to fix the lock and then leave.”

Billy nodded mutely and Brian wasn’t concerned he wouldn’t obey. The kid was scared. Brian wondered if he was hiding his fear any better. He hoped so but he doubted it. He headed back towards Babylon, a sock clutched in his fist.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin felt himself fading. He was having difficulty getting enough air. He couldn’t move. He wondered what time it was, how long he’d been here. He had a feeling he’d been slipping in and out of consciousness. He couldn’t be sure. The door opened again but this time it didn’t close behind the man in the doorway.

“Shut the door. He’ll be able to identify us.”

“He’s gonna be in a million little pieces along with everything in this building. Dead men make lousy witnesses.”

Justin panic as the door slammed. There were two men in the room with him. He tried to see what they were doing but when he turned his head, the world seemed to lurch and then spin. He thought he might vomit.

“Run that over there, around the room. Make sure the whole thing goes up.

“This won’t work, it’s got to be in the main area to…”

“It’ll work, I’ve got it rigged right. The kid’ll pass out from the smoke when the fire starts. He won’t feel a thing when it goes off.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, now set it.”

Justin smelled smoke. He closed his eyes and ducked his head, trying not to lose it. The flames were low, but the walls were beginning to catch fire.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Brian got to the building just as they were breaking down the door. He smelled the smoke and moved quickly. Wires were running around the building and across the floor. They all came from under wooden door. Smoke was beginning to spill out of that room. 

“J U S T I N!”

Brian thought he heard a cough. He moved towards the door, shoulder first. Carl pulled him back. “You open that the whole place goes up.”

“Justin’s in there.”

Four firemen were standing in full gear, yelling to one another. They battered down the door. The flames blazed and blew Brian backwards. 

Brian blacked out.

When he sat back up the fire was gone. Smoke hung heavy in the air and they were removing tape from Justin’s arms. Brian was a full ten feet from where he’d been standing and saw them carrying a lifeless form from the room. A lifeless form with blond hair. He moved quickly, pulling Justin away from the firefighter, cradling him in his arms. 

A tear slid slowly, taking a layer of soot and ash with him. He walked out of the building. He couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, just needed to get Justin to an ambulance. He couldn’t be dead. 

He put Justin’s limp body onto a stretcher. Taking his cold hand into his own, wanting to give him his warmth, his breath, his heartbeat. He saw the red raw marks on Justin’s wrists and let another tear fall unheeded. Justin’s lips were blue. His face was covered in soot. Brian just wanted to see his eyes.

He closed his own knowing he’d never see them again. “I love you.” He murmured to Justin’s lifeless form.

Justin coughed. Brian’s head shot up. “Justin?”

Justin laughed, “You love me? You’ve known me for less than a month. He shook his head wanly, drama queen.”

Brian laughed. He leaned in and kissed Justin. 

Justin tried kiss Brian but it turned into a coughing fit. The EMTs put a mask over Justin’s nose and mouth. Brian kissed his cheek. “I think you got a reprieve from your mother’s candlelight vigil.”

Justin nodded, never loosening his grip on Brian’s fingers.

They strapped Justin on to the gurney and loaded it into the back of the ambulance.

Carl approached Brian. “You were right. Everything we need to convict Daniel and Morrison is in there.”

Brian nodded, getting into the ambulance.

“I’m going to need you to help with this stuff.” Carl called after him.

“Monday.” Brian replied. And the ambulance doors closed, leaving the two of them alone… except for the EMTs.

Brian did his level best not to lose contact with Justin throughout the day. The only time Justin was out of his sight was during the CAT scan and X-rays and those times were under protest. Michael brought Brian’s jeep to him, Carl driving him back to the comic store. 

Five hours later Justin was released with a clean bill of health. They wheeled him to the door while he groused about being able to walk on his own. Brian had the jeep ready and waiting. He attempted to help Justin in but his hands were slapped away. Brian didn’t respond. The glaringly white bandages on his wrists were enough to remind Brian that a strong, independent, snarky Justin was better than the alternative.

They were driving down the road, Justin playing with the wind resistance his head back, his eyes closed. “Thanks.”

“For what?”

“Rescuing me?”

“It’s my job.”

Justin let out a long breath and then coughed again. “Are we going back to my place?”

Brian looked over at him. “Your place?”

“I need to sleep.”

“You sleep fine at the loft.”

 

“Oh Christ, is this going to make you _more_ protective?”

Brian shook his head. “I have to assume you learned something from all of this.”

Justin didn’t say another word, but Brian took his not arguing to adamantly about the loft issue as a good sign.

When they got there Justin looked around out of habit. “No one’s following. There’s no one to hide from anymore.”

Justin nodded quietly and then winced. “Let’s go upstairs and you can take something for that.”

Justin leaned heavily against Brian. When the got inside the loft Brian half walked half carried him to bed. “Rest, I’ll get you something to drink.”

“Scotch.”

“With vicoprofen? I don’t think so.”

“Make sure they gave me the right pills. I don’t have the energy to be sick all night.’

Brian brought Justin a glass of guava juice, a bottle of water and the pills. Justin took them and then moved to stand up.

“Where are you going?”

“Shower. I’m covered in grime and…

Brian nodded. “We have to cover the cast on your hand and all those bandages first.”

Justin sat back down on the bed heavily. “I really wish you had a tub.”

“To tired to stand?”

Justin nodded.

“I’ve got a cleaning service. Don’t worry about the sheets, just sleep.”

Justin seemed too tired to argue anything. He pulled his shirt over his head and Brian saw the bruises, some from the firemen pulling him free, some from his fight with whoever took him in the first place. He didn’t say anything. Justin’s pants, grimy and dark were off next. When he was naked he slid under the sheets and closed his eyes. Brian thought he might already be asleep. He took the juice glass back to the kitchen.

“Brian?”

Brian moved closer. “Can you just… stay… next to me? Just for a little bit?”

 

He’d been afraid to try, afraid Justin wasn’t ready, or was scared off by his proclamation, made in the heat of a moment of cold terror. He stripped off his own clothes and curled behind Justin. Justin turned around in his arms, burying his face into Brian’s chest. He kissed it lightly. “I know you don’t love me…yet, but it was still nice to hear.”

Brian nodded, his chin resting on Justin’s head. “I’m glad you don’t mind hearing it.”

“I don’t love you yet either, but I might someday.”

“You’ll let me know when that happens?’

“I promise.”

“Good. Now sleep.” Brian kissed the top of Justin’s head and waited 'til he was sure Justin was asleep before he let himself drift.

~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**

Justin’s POV

I wake up to the soft sound of Brian’s heartbeat against my ear. I’m still feeling fuzzy, and grimy. I’m trying to remember what the hell happened. I know I was fading. I saw Brian but he was blown backwards and then there were flames everywhere. Then… he said he loved me. I push away from him a little. He’s still asleep and I study the lines of his face. He said he loved me because he thought I was dead. He didn’t think I’d call him on it.

He doesn’t believe in love… unless the person is dead? This is one fucked up man I’m involved with. And yes, we _are_ involved. I don’t think we can deny it anymore. His eyes flutter open and he pulls me back against him. His body, warm and hard. He rolls on top of me… Christ, is that _all_ he can think about?

His lips are soft as they touch mine. His tongue presses against my lips, asking for entrance. I let him in and can’t hold back the soft moan as he presses his cock to mine while he plunders my mouth. Now it’s all I can think about. I want him. 

I spread my legs under him; he sinks further into me, resting his hips between my thighs. We’re both still a little grimy and I know we should shower but I don’t think that’ll make me feel half as clean as I will once he’s inside me. I wrap my legs around his waist. I can’t cross my ankles. One of them is still bandaged and sore. He moves, reaching for a condom and lube and then pulls back.

I’m lying on the bed watching him watch me. He’s studying my face. I know what he’s looking for. He wants to see if I’m scared. I am, but not of him. Maybe a little scared of what I feel for him, but that’s okay, you should have seen his face when I woke up and he realized I’d heard him. Terror. It’s the only word to describe it. 

Ramp up the emotions and the adrenaline this much and anyone is going to think it’s love…or hate. But it’s neither. It’s caring, it’s something, and it _could_ be love. I’d be willing to call it love, but not yet. I tried that once, loving too much, too soon just to make a point. We’ll take this slow.

Speaking of slow… his hands are stroking my thighs, light touches. Then they span them and his thumb presses, just a little, spreading me. I move with him, letting my legs fall open, letting him look, and he looks…hungry. His mouth is on me, everywhere. His hands moving over my ass while his tongue laves my balls and then moves up to my cock. He’s not sucking, just licking, tasting. I watch as a thread of pre come reaches from his tongue to the head of my cock when he pulls away. I moan. I can’t help it. He’s pulling my cheeks apart and I want to impale myself on the hot sharp tip of his tongue but he teases me instead. His hands slide up my chest. They stop when they can’t find my nipple ring. They took it off in the hospital. I probably won’t put it back on, except he’s almost pouting, like someone took away his favorite toy… someone almost did.

Maybe I _will_ put it back on. His hands continue to move over me, as if he’s trying to memorize the lines of my body. I think he’s scared this will be the last time we fuck. He thinks he scared me away. I thought he knew me better than that.

His tongue is back to licking my ass. I can feel myself opening and stretching for his persistent fingers. I’m wet and open and I want him to fuck me. I pull at his arm, which is stroking my hip. He holds my hand for a moment but when his thumb runs over my cast he pulls away. Repulsed or afraid he’s going to hurt me? I’m not sure which. I’d rather he be afraid. 

“Brian.”

He looks up.

“Brian, kiss me.”

He’s draped over my body again and I can tell he’s balancing his weight on the parts of him that aren’t on me. He’s treating me like a china doll… except his kiss is not gentle at all, it’s demanding and insistent and I can’t resist.

My hands move to the back of his head, holding him to me. I nibble his bottom lip as he pulls back a little. “Fuck me.”

He looks a little hesitant and I lift my chin, exposing my neck and pulling him against it. I say it again, demanding. “Fuck. Me.”

His teeth scrape my Adam’s apple and I know we’re back to the same page. He rolls the condom on. I feel him press against my hole and I know that the only thing that will make this all okay is if he does fuck me. I don’t want him to make love to me. I want him to fuck the shit out of me. I want to feel whole, and strong and right and that’s what I feel when we’re fucking. If he doesn’t do it soon I’m going to roll us over and take control of this whole thing.

He slides in, trying to go slow but I curl my body under his, wrap my legs around his waist and let him impale me.

He grunts and I smile. He smoothes the hair off my face and I repeat the command “fuck. Me.”

He’s moving hard and fast now. His hands on the pillow on either side of my head. His kisses claiming and satisfying. His hips slamming against my ass as he pounds into me. And when I come, I know I was right. I feel renewed, cleansed, and whole. He comes a moment later and collapses on top of me. He laughs and I kiss him. “I love it when you laugh in bed.”

“You’re fucking amazing.”

“You’re not so bad yourself.”

“Justin, I…”

I nod. “I need to shower too. Let’s go.”

He laughs again and we head for the shower. He kisses me between each bandage he has to cover and when we’re inside the shower, and the water is no longer gray but clear. When we’ve both cleaned every inch of one another I pull him down for another kiss. “I’ll definitely let you know.”

He nods and he makes me sit and take it easy while he changes the sheets on the bed. It may not take as long as I thought before I love him.”

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
